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    #1

    jealousy

    Long story short.. Coworker of mine met her now husband online two years ago. She came to me for advice with everything because I was already in a ldr. Now she hardly speaks to me. I have been now for seven years. So after she met him a year later he proposed, and they got married in Dec she is now moving to be with him in july. Why cant I just be happy for her? She is acting like she has the best relationship
    she walks around like her s*** dont stink - yanno? Let me ask you guys, she saw him maybe 5 times, before they got engaged. is that too soon? Anyway. Im not a mean person but how do I overcome this stupid jealousy? I have a wonderful man in my life whom I love . Thanks for any input.

    ugh
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    #2
    Originally posted by angeldi View Post
    Long story short.. Coworker of mine met her now husband online two years ago. She came to me for advice with everything because I was already in a ldr. Now she hardly speaks to me. I have been now for seven years. So after she met him a year later he proposed, and they got married in Dec she is now moving to be with him in july. Why cant I just be happy for her? She is acting like she has the best relationship
    she walks around like her s*** dont stink - yanno? Let me ask you guys, she saw him maybe 5 times, before they got engaged. is that too soon? Anyway. Im not a mean person but how do I overcome this stupid jealousy? I have a wonderful man in my life whom I love . Thanks for any input.

    ugh
    You are trying to temper, your jealousy with disgust for how little time they have spent together.

    Also, Let me try to put in perspective, and this is not a complaint about my SO, but an illustration of love. Apart from 2012(not yet in 2013), we have seen for a week each year (2008-2011). Yet, There have been countless phone, e-mail, and IM conversations in between. Also, She has given me more, than my (ex)wife n' (ex)fiance combined. So our love is exists, not only because of visible means'(spending time together). But also non-visual means'(phone, e-mail, IM). It is those non-visual means', that may have allowed their relationship to flourish.

    First Visit: September 2016
    Second Visit: January 2017 (Her birthday)
    Third Visit: June 2018 (medical conference near her home)

    John 3:16
    For God so loved the world. That he gave his only begotten son. For whosoever believeth in him. Shall not perish but have eternal life
    John 4:12
    I am the way, the truth, and the life. No one comes to the Father except through me.

    Comment

      #3
      I know it's hard, but can't compare your relationship to anyone else's - no matter how similar your situations seem to be. If she doesn't speak to you, I'd let it go. "Too soon" for one person may "not be soon enough" for another. Of course she's walking around like she has the best relationship ever - I know I do. I mean, mine is better than yours because it's mine. Because I have the perfect SO, right? (In reality, I know he's not perfect, and by no means is our relationship perfect, but it's pretty darn awesome because he makes me happy.)

      Anyway. Overcoming jealousy differs per person. For me, it helps me to talk it through with someone. Sometimes it's a face-to-face with a girlfriend, sometimes it's via text/video chat with my SO, other times it's a blog on here. If It's really bothering you, think about it this way: she's leaving your place of work soon and you won't have to see her again. Out of sight, out of mind.


      2016 Goal: Buy a house.
      Progress: Complete!

      2017 Goal: Pay off credit card debt
      Progress: Working on it.

      Comment

        #4
        Two years and 5 visits I don't think that is too soon. I met mine a year ago and we have had 5 visits a week long each time. I am ready to marry him and I said I would never get married again. I knew after the first few months and things have only gotten better.

        I think it is normal to get jealous as long as you don't treat her differently. Just because things are different in her relationship than yours doesn't make her worse or better just different. Jealousy is normal as long as it doesn't control your life.

        Comment

          #5
          I know people that have gotten married after 2-3 years and some that still aren't married after being together for 9 years.
          Every relationship is different and every relationship works at a different pace. Do you want to be married to your SO?
          Is it an issue for you that you are not married with him? Instead of being angry at your co-worker for being happy, you should try to figure out why it makes you unhappy in the first place.

          Comment

            #6
            Originally posted by angeldi View Post
            Long story short.. Coworker of mine met her now husband online two years ago. She came to me for advice with everything because I was already in a ldr. Now she hardly speaks to me. I have been now for seven years. So after she met him a year later he proposed, and they got married in Dec she is now moving to be with him in july. Why cant I just be happy for her? She is acting like she has the best relationship
            she walks around like her s*** dont stink - yanno? Let me ask you guys, she saw him maybe 5 times, before they got engaged. is that too soon? Anyway. Im not a mean person but how do I overcome this stupid jealousy? I have a wonderful man in my life whom I love . Thanks for any input.

            ugh
            I have a similar feeling everytime I see any two people together. It's unfair but such is life.

            Just look to them and say "That will be us, and it will be worth it"

            Comment

              #7
              Originally posted by lyonsgirl View Post
              I know it's hard, but can't compare your relationship to anyone else's - no matter how similar your situations seem to be. If she doesn't speak to you, I'd let it go. "Too soon" for one person may "not be soon enough" for another. Of course she's walking around like she has the best relationship ever - I know I do. I mean, mine is better than yours because it's mine. Because I have the perfect SO, right? (In reality, I know he's not perfect, and by no means is our relationship perfect, but it's pretty darn awesome because he makes me happy.)

              Anyway. Overcoming jealousy differs per person. For me, it helps me to talk it through with someone. Sometimes it's a face-to-face with a girlfriend, sometimes it's via text/video chat with my SO, other times it's a blog on here. If It's really bothering you, think about it this way: she's leaving your place of work soon and you won't have to see her again. Out of sight, out of mind.
              This..

              ♥ In 666 Ways I Love You & My Heaven Is Wherever You Are. I'm For You. ♥

              We Met: June 9,2010
              Back Together: August 1,2012
              First Visit: September 21,2012 - September 29,2012
              Second Visit: January 13,2013 - February 24,2013
              Engaged: January 17,2013
              Closed The Distance-MS - AZ: June 15th,2013
              Moved To FL Together: November 14,2013
              We Got Married! - July 3,2014
              SO Graduated College - August 7,2015
              Moved to Ky - August 10, 2015

              Comment

                #8
                Thank You all so much =) opened my eyes more. Stupid me. Yes me and my SO will marry one day. I thought I was crazy and being ridiculous.

                Comment

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