jealousy

[angeldi]

Long story short.. Coworker of mine met her now husband online two years ago. She came to me for advice with everything because I was already in a ldr. Now she hardly speaks to me. I have been now for seven years. So after she met him a year later he proposed, and they got married in Dec she is now moving to be with him in july. Why cant I just be happy for her? She is acting like she has the best relationship
she walks around like her s*** dont stink - yanno? Let me ask you guys, she saw him maybe 5 times, before they got engaged. is that too soon? Anyway. Im not a mean person but how do I overcome this stupid jealousy? I have a wonderful man in my life whom I love . Thanks for any input.

ugh

[Chris516]

Long story short.. Coworker of mine met her now husband online two years ago. She came to me for advice with everything because I was already in a ldr. Now she hardly speaks to me. I have been now for seven years. So after she met him a year later he proposed, and they got married in Dec she is now moving to be with him in july. Why cant I just be happy for her? She is acting like she has the best relationship
she walks around like her s*** dont stink - yanno? Let me ask you guys, she saw him maybe 5 times, before they got engaged. is that too soon? Anyway. Im not a mean person but how do I overcome this stupid jealousy? I have a wonderful man in my life whom I love . Thanks for any input.

ugh

You are trying to temper, your jealousy with disgust for how little time they have spent together.

Also, Let me try to put in perspective, and this is not a complaint about my SO, but an illustration of love. Apart from 2012(not yet in 2013), we have seen for a week each year (2008-2011). Yet, There have been countless phone, e-mail, and IM conversations in between. Also, She has given me more, than my (ex)wife n' (ex)fiance combined. So our love is exists, not only because of visible means'(spending time together). But also non-visual means'(phone, e-mail, IM). It is those non-visual means', that may have allowed their relationship to flourish.

[lyonsgirl]

I know it's hard, but can't compare your relationship to anyone else's - no matter how similar your situations seem to be. If she doesn't speak to you, I'd let it go. "Too soon" for one person may "not be soon enough" for another. Of course she's walking around like she has the best relationship ever - I know I do. I mean, mine is better than yours because it's mine. Because I have the perfect SO, right? (In reality, I know he's not perfect, and by no means is our relationship perfect, but it's pretty darn awesome because he makes me happy.)

Anyway. Overcoming jealousy differs per person. For me, it helps me to talk it through with someone. Sometimes it's a face-to-face with a girlfriend, sometimes it's via text/video chat with my SO, other times it's a blog on here. If It's really bothering you, think about it this way: she's leaving your place of work soon and you won't have to see her again. Out of sight, out of mind.

[srtd35]

Two years and 5 visits I don't think that is too soon. I met mine a year ago and we have had 5 visits a week long each time. I am ready to marry him and I said I would never get married again. I knew after the first few months and things have only gotten better.

I think it is normal to get jealous as long as you don't treat her differently. Just because things are different in her relationship than yours doesn't make her worse or better just different. Jealousy is normal as long as it doesn't control your life.

[princessmaria]

I know people that have gotten married after 2-3 years and some that still aren't married after being together for 9 years.
Every relationship is different and every relationship works at a different pace. Do you want to be married to your SO?
Is it an issue for you that you are not married with him? Instead of being angry at your co-worker for being happy, you should try to figure out why it makes you unhappy in the first place.

[Swederica]

Long story short.. Coworker of mine met her now husband online two years ago. She came to me for advice with everything because I was already in a ldr. Now she hardly speaks to me. I have been now for seven years. So after she met him a year later he proposed, and they got married in Dec she is now moving to be with him in july. Why cant I just be happy for her? She is acting like she has the best relationship
she walks around like her s*** dont stink - yanno? Let me ask you guys, she saw him maybe 5 times, before they got engaged. is that too soon? Anyway. Im not a mean person but how do I overcome this stupid jealousy? I have a wonderful man in my life whom I love . Thanks for any input.

ugh

I have a similar feeling everytime I see any two people together. It's unfair but such is life.

Just look to them and say "That will be us, and it will be worth it"

[LadyDaemon]

I know it's hard, but can't compare your relationship to anyone else's - no matter how similar your situations seem to be. If she doesn't speak to you, I'd let it go. "Too soon" for one person may "not be soon enough" for another. Of course she's walking around like she has the best relationship ever - I know I do. I mean, mine is better than yours because it's mine. Because I have the perfect SO, right? (In reality, I know he's not perfect, and by no means is our relationship perfect, but it's pretty darn awesome because he makes me happy.)

Anyway. Overcoming jealousy differs per person. For me, it helps me to talk it through with someone. Sometimes it's a face-to-face with a girlfriend, sometimes it's via text/video chat with my SO, other times it's a blog on here. If It's really bothering you, think about it this way: she's leaving your place of work soon and you won't have to see her again. Out of sight, out of mind.

This..

[angeldi]

Thank You all so much =) opened my eyes more. Stupid me. Yes me and my SO will marry one day. I thought I was crazy and being ridiculous.