When your Dad doesn't trust your LDR..

[MTK]

Have you tried telling your dad that you will visit your SO no matter what and it would mean a lot to you if he would set aside his preconcieved notions and talk with this guy so he can see what kind of guy you are going to be spending you time with. Also it might help diminish whatever worries he might have.

[Sav88]

Oh yes and he's not budging a bit. He just doesn't trust my SO because he's from the internet and it's terrible! I tried asking my Dad to consider talking to him on skype and he was still like,"No! I won't trust him still," I'm going through some family heartache right now, with my Mum dying in hospital and so maybe it's just a bit too much for my Dad to handle right now- with losing his wife and thinking he'd lose me. So I'm going to give him a few months to settle.

[LadyMarchHare]

I'm sorry about your mom.

That definitely could be the major factor. A lot of fathers are protective of their daughters, more so when the wife is gone/has passed. It's just the desire to protect and to love and so when girls get to an age where they "leave the nest" and see boys this sort of thing happens. That it's taking place so soon after a tragedy (even a few months is soon, some people can grieve openly for years) it's not a surprise he's acting a tad irrational.

[Yei&Jon]

Well if your dad refuses to take that step, then that's his own fault. There's a line between the atypical parental concern and this level of, well, ignorance. People who are firmly grounded in their beliefs, whatever they may be, will either take an act of congress to change their mind or will never budge. Honestly, this isn't disobeying your parents. Yes it's going against what your dad believes you should do, but technically he can't order you to stay or take your passport or anything and I think that's half his problem. You're 22, not 12, and he doesn't have the final say on you anymore. You can still be his little girl at times but gone are the days when he says "no" and you have to obey. As for your aunt, well, if she thinks a photograph is a voice she needs her head checked.

Honestly, we never know someone completely, even if we're with them in person. I know that from personal experience. Does it mean don't take the chance? No. You're trusting what you know about him and this trip will give you an opportunity to see more such as how he acts every day, and you come away more in love with them and trusting them more. It's a learning experience. But really in this case, do what you need to do regardless of the toes you step on to do it. You deserve this bit of happiness as much as anyone and a few naysayers shouldn't tear the sail on your ship.

Wow, just, wow. This right here almost made me cry as well for the fact that I'm going through the exact same thing as the OP even after meeting my SO before. My dad still has a problem with me visitng again in September. So, Sav, I know exactly how it is.

[Sav88]

Well I haven't discussed it further as my Mum passed away today. I think it'll be best to just let things cool off. Thankyou all for the support

[Čternity]

Oh Sav, I'm so sorry about your Mum. Take care of yourself.

[JoMarie]

Im so sorry to hear about your mom. You are in my thoughts.

[Yei&Jon]

I am so sorry for your loss, Sav.

[Silviar]

Well I haven't discussed it further as my Mum passed away today. I think it'll be best to just let things cool off. Thankyou all for the support

Sav, my condolences to you and your family. I'm sorry for your loss.

[Sav88]

Thankyou all so much. I am okay, I'm pretty much like a on and off tap. My SO has been really supportive and lovely over the last few months of my Mum being sick. I will miss her alot, because she was my best friend. But seeing her struggling throughout, I'm happy she's now not in any discomfort anymore. I told her as she was laying there that I'd be with her until the very end, and I was.