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    Look what I found!

    Finally! A positive article about LDRs!!!

    https://www.today.com/health/long-di...udy-6C10660702

    Hooooorayyyy!


    2016 Goal: Buy a house.
    Progress: Complete!

    2017 Goal: Pay off credit card debt
    Progress: Working on it.

    #2
    We do need some allies!!!!

    Comment


      #3
      Awesome article! Thanks for sharing!

      "True love isn't about being inseparable; it’s about two people being true to each other even when they are separated."
      Married April 18th, 2015!!
      Distance Closed October 4th, 2015!!

      Comment


        #4
        I'll admit I just skimmed the article, but it's nice to see something positive for once.

        Comment


          #5
          Nice! Appreciate the share
          Our separation of each other is an optical illusion of consciousness. ~Albert Einstein

          Comment


            #6
            Woo! Makes a change

            Comment


              #7
              Awesome article! Read it while I'm waiting to board my plane actually. Thanks for sharing!



              Comment


                #8
                Thank you for sharing ! It's great to read something positive for a change and not how we're all doomed

                Comment


                  #9
                  Shared this with my SO.
                  It's funny, I used to think about the ole stigma that "LDRs are doomed to fail." But since being in one, I have to say I haven't thought about it once until this article! ^_^;

                  Comment


                    #10
                    The only thing I don't like is that they called it a "trend", what the f*** is trendy about living apart from somebody you love? and what, "computer marriages"?

                    Also, I hate the fact that "This new study, and others before it, have shown that long distance partners tend to idealize each other, or see them in unrealistically positive terms." what in the efff?! Unrealistic?

                    It seems really offensive to me, as much as I want to praise something positive I just can't, sorry :/
                    Made it official: 12-01-10
                    First visit: 3-29-13/4-09-13
                    Closed the distance: 07-31-13

                    Comment


                      #11
                      Originally posted by Black_Halloween View Post
                      The only thing I don't like is that they called it a "trend", what the f*** is trendy about living apart from somebody you love? and what, "computer marriages"?

                      Also, I hate the fact that "This new study, and others before it, have shown that long distance partners tend to idealize each other, or see them in unrealistically positive terms." what in the efff?! Unrealistic?

                      It seems really offensive to me, as much as I want to praise something positive I just can't, sorry :/
                      I don't know if "trend" in this case meant... a fad. It's more popular because more people are finding themselves in situations where they are living apart, not that "it's the new cool thing to do". At least, that's the impression I got from it.

                      As for the idealized thing.... I think you might be (not saying you absolutely are, just saying it's a possibility) taking it out of context. "He's been gone for eight months; he's not going to remember I like the dishwasher loaded a certain way." - I think the idealizing of your partner is inevitable. It's not "oh he's so wonderful and perfect and amazing" but more of a "When we're living together it will be no different than before" or, in some cases if you have been able to be CD prior to LD and then when you are CD again, "nothing will have changed since the last time we were CD". But it does.

                      I'm sorry you were offended by this article, though. I thought it was generally positive, and shed good light on LDRs, rather than all of the negative side that the media tends to focus on, which is why I shared it.


                      2016 Goal: Buy a house.
                      Progress: Complete!

                      2017 Goal: Pay off credit card debt
                      Progress: Working on it.

                      Comment


                        #12
                        I think i'm just looking at this differently than everybody else is. Sure, there are some good points but there was this one part that got me too:

                        The couples in long-distance relationships reported interacting with each other a little less often every day than the couples who lived close by. But the separated couples reported “experiencing greater intimacy” – or, feeling closer to their partners, as intimacy is defined here – than the couples who were geographically closer.

                        This is basically saying that LDRs are better than close distance relationships, I feel, which is false. Who is this person to say that LDRs have better relationships than CDRs? We all have our own issues wither or not we're close or not. Trying to prove a point while bringing somebody else down is not commendable. That's like when plus size women say "men dont like bones, they like meat plus size ftw", its just wrong in my eyes.

                        When somebody says word "trend" they mean fad. Its just how the media works. I'm sorry i'm being so negative about this article because it did start out alright but then it just got worse as i was reading it. I'm still shocked at the term "computer marriages"...ugh!
                        Made it official: 12-01-10
                        First visit: 3-29-13/4-09-13
                        Closed the distance: 07-31-13

                        Comment


                          #13
                          Originally posted by Black_Halloween View Post
                          When somebody says word "trend" they mean fad. Its just how the media works. I'm sorry i'm being so negative about this article because it did start out alright but then it just got worse as i was reading it. I'm still shocked at the term "computer marriages"...ugh!
                          It actually says "commuter marriages", not "computer", though, I can see how commuter and computer can be misread, especially if you're reading quickly. (I admit I had to read the article again to find where marriage was even mentioned.)

                          ETA: As for the rest, I can't say how anyone else's relationship is. But for me personally, I know my relationship has benefited from being LD. I'm not saying that my relationship is better than anyone else's because of this fact, not by any means. For all I know, my relationship could be doomed to failure - but not because we're LD, but because of reasons that are unknown to me at the current time.
                          Last edited by lyonsgirl; July 19, 2013, 01:15 PM.


                          2016 Goal: Buy a house.
                          Progress: Complete!

                          2017 Goal: Pay off credit card debt
                          Progress: Working on it.

                          Comment


                            #14
                            O_o I swear it said computer when I read it. Either i'm losing it or she changed it on me
                            Made it official: 12-01-10
                            First visit: 3-29-13/4-09-13
                            Closed the distance: 07-31-13

                            Comment


                              #15
                              Originally posted by lyonsgirl View Post
                              I don't know if "trend" in this case meant... a fad. It's more popular because more people are finding themselves in situations where they are living apart, not that "it's the new cool thing to do". At least, that's the impression I got from it.

                              As for the idealized thing.... I think you might be (not saying you absolutely are, just saying it's a possibility) taking it out of context. "He's been gone for eight months; he's not going to remember I like the dishwasher loaded a certain way." - I think the idealizing of your partner is inevitable. It's not "oh he's so wonderful and perfect and amazing" but more of a "When we're living together it will be no different than before" or, in some cases if you have been able to be CD prior to LD and then when you are CD again, "nothing will have changed since the last time we were CD". But it does.

                              I'm sorry you were offended by this article, though. I thought it was generally positive, and shed good light on LDRs, rather than all of the negative side that the media tends to focus on, which is why I shared it.
                              It reminds me of the internet in the early-mid 2000's. Back then, only 'nerds' used it, but now we all live and integrate our daily functions into it, especially LDR's. With the nature of particular jobs and the rise of the internet, it's not impossible to maintain a relationship over a large distance (as we also show ourselves) when you're forced to be apart.

                              I dare say that a couple that started as CD would have a different experience to those who started as LD.

                              Comment

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