Okay this is going to be a little bit of a long explanation...
The guy I am trying to get into an LDR with I've known since I was a freshman in high school. I am currently 24 yeas old. When in high school we dated but then about a year or so later he moved to IL.. Throughout the 10 years we've known each other we have stayed in contact. There would be months in between talking but we always made sure to check on each other.
Last summer, he broke up with his girlfriend and we really started talking again. Talking way more often than we did before. Before I knew it he was my date to my best friends wedding in November. Leading up to the wedding we would text everyday. Sometimes a phone a call would happen. After the wedding, we texted and called each other everyday. That following December he flew down to see me. It was an amazing couple of days where we acted as if we were together. After he visited we continued to talk and text everyday. We even planned a trip for me to go visit him in February.
A few weeks after he came to visit me he became very busy. He was helping opening up a restaurant which took up a ton of his time. I knew he was busy so I didn't expect for him to be able to talk as mush as we did before. Then about two weeks before my trip he felt the he couldn't handle an LDR and that I shouldn't come to visit him. So I cancelled my flight. I was heartbroken.
After a couple of weeks of talking every so often he started talking to me again as if we were together. I told him he needed to stop because it was messing with my head. I told him if he just wanted to be friends then he needed to talk to me just as a friend. So he backed off a little. We would text about once or twice a week for a few months.
This past June, I realized that I still have really strong feelings for him. We were texting one night and I just told him how I felt. He told me that he had feelings for me too and and that out situation was just super complicated. We texted for a while and suddenly it got brought up about me going to visit him.
I booked my flights and was going to go see him in July. Leading up to my trip we texted everyday. Then came the time to go visit. While I was there it was great. Again, we acted as if we were pretty much together while I was visiting him. We hung out with his friends and some of them told me that he talks about me and that they felt like they knew me already.
I just got home two days ago and find myself having quite a difficult time. I sent him some texts and told him how I was feeling. I told him how it confuses me that when we are together in the same place we act like a couple but when we are back in our home cities we talk every so often. He told me that he understood and appreciated my honesty. That seeing me was good for the both of us. But that he is a super distracted individual. He told me that its fair to say that he has feelings for me but its not something that he was prepared to maintain.
He is the type of guy who is super focused on his career right now. During my visit we had a serious conversation about his job. As he telling me about everything I realized that his career is super important to him.
I am just confused. I want to get into an LDR with him but he is so hesitant. If we were in an LDR I would seriously consider moving to where he lived next summer. I feel like he is being so negative about an LDR without even talking to me about it.
What do I do?
The guy I am trying to get into an LDR with I've known since I was a freshman in high school. I am currently 24 yeas old. When in high school we dated but then about a year or so later he moved to IL.. Throughout the 10 years we've known each other we have stayed in contact. There would be months in between talking but we always made sure to check on each other.
Last summer, he broke up with his girlfriend and we really started talking again. Talking way more often than we did before. Before I knew it he was my date to my best friends wedding in November. Leading up to the wedding we would text everyday. Sometimes a phone a call would happen. After the wedding, we texted and called each other everyday. That following December he flew down to see me. It was an amazing couple of days where we acted as if we were together. After he visited we continued to talk and text everyday. We even planned a trip for me to go visit him in February.
A few weeks after he came to visit me he became very busy. He was helping opening up a restaurant which took up a ton of his time. I knew he was busy so I didn't expect for him to be able to talk as mush as we did before. Then about two weeks before my trip he felt the he couldn't handle an LDR and that I shouldn't come to visit him. So I cancelled my flight. I was heartbroken.
After a couple of weeks of talking every so often he started talking to me again as if we were together. I told him he needed to stop because it was messing with my head. I told him if he just wanted to be friends then he needed to talk to me just as a friend. So he backed off a little. We would text about once or twice a week for a few months.
This past June, I realized that I still have really strong feelings for him. We were texting one night and I just told him how I felt. He told me that he had feelings for me too and and that out situation was just super complicated. We texted for a while and suddenly it got brought up about me going to visit him.
I booked my flights and was going to go see him in July. Leading up to my trip we texted everyday. Then came the time to go visit. While I was there it was great. Again, we acted as if we were pretty much together while I was visiting him. We hung out with his friends and some of them told me that he talks about me and that they felt like they knew me already.
I just got home two days ago and find myself having quite a difficult time. I sent him some texts and told him how I was feeling. I told him how it confuses me that when we are together in the same place we act like a couple but when we are back in our home cities we talk every so often. He told me that he understood and appreciated my honesty. That seeing me was good for the both of us. But that he is a super distracted individual. He told me that its fair to say that he has feelings for me but its not something that he was prepared to maintain.
He is the type of guy who is super focused on his career right now. During my visit we had a serious conversation about his job. As he telling me about everything I realized that his career is super important to him.
I am just confused. I want to get into an LDR with him but he is so hesitant. If we were in an LDR I would seriously consider moving to where he lived next summer. I feel like he is being so negative about an LDR without even talking to me about it.
What do I do?
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