Building/increasing attraction online

[Moon]

Moon .. respectfully .. that WAS very negative and that's NOT what I came here for. It's not your place to judge the nature of our relationship from a few posts on a site compared to years of experiences that she and I have shared that I can't even begin to get into on here. If you could, "hear" your words from my perspective, knowing what I know about the two of us, you would realize how completely off base you are .. again, making assumptions without knowing NEARLY the whole story. And I'm not interested in wasting my time and space on this site to explain how everything you said is wrong. I came here for suggestions on how to move forward, not for reasons why I should give up. But I will say this:

About your comment:



please re-read what I said:

Okay? Okay.

And just to clarify, I was just using the Hachiko analogy as to show that I am in this 100% .. even if she is not at that place yet. I'm not prepared to give up on her .. not yet. I didn't post here and ask, "Do you think this relationship is worth pursuing?" I've asked and answered that question myself so until she says so herself in no uncertain terms that she feels otherwise .. I'm not interested in anyone's negative opinions made with extremely limited information. Not trying to sound mean .. just letting you know.

Edited: You know .. I was having a bad enough week, dealing with being so far from her and after joining here, I started to feel a little better about things. But this post of yours completely ruined that and I'm feeling like crap again. Thanks ..

Quite frankly, I don't care what you came here to hear, you get what you get on a public forum, buddy. I don't go for the guilt thing either, so your little edit means nothing to me. If you wanna live in a fantasy, feel free, I don't know you, and it's not my problem. I'll give you whatever opinion *I* feel is appropriate, if you don't like it and can't handle reality from a non-biased third party you chose to seek advice from, please feel free to block and report me, seriously, please do

You are too sensitive for the internet if you thought my post was even 1/4 as negative as you try portraying it. I assure you that I won't be bothering to read any other threads you create, you illogical, ungrateful man.

[alizee]

Methos, that*s so nice of you to say that women from Romania are very beautiful! That*s a lot of promoting for us I saw that you went to Sinaia, have you visited the Peles Castle???? It*s breath taking!!!!
What is attraction???? To me, attraction is far more than the physical. The physical is important, yes, but when there*s no connection with somebody than the physical attraction will eventually die.
It seems to me that you have a great connection, that for sure led to attraction, because why did you 2 talked for 4 years???? I mean it*s 4 years and that*s got to mean something!!!! I mean you can*t connect to somebody that long without feeling something for him/ her.
And you also visited her - met her friends/ family, and that*s another important thing. Did she invite you if you were just a friend? I don*t think so ... I mean I wouldn*t invite somebody to meet my family/ friends from the other corner of the world, if he was just a friend. And she cares about you, because you wrote that she was worried about you many times ...
How old is she???? Maybe is is a little imature and doesn*t know what she wants ... you see, I think that LDRs can be confusing for both parts, because the distance is hard to take and takes its toll menthally ...
Haven*t you 2 discussed about a future face to face meeting or even better about closing the distance???

[ThePiedPiper]

Quite frankly, I don't care what you came here to hear, you get what you get on a public forum, buddy. I don't go for the guilt thing either, so your little edit means nothing to me. If you wanna live in a fantasy, feel free, I don't know you, and it's not my problem. I'll give you whatever opinion *I* feel is appropriate, if you don't like it and can't handle reality from a non-biased third party you chose to seek advice from, please feel free to block and report me, seriously, please do

You are too sensitive for the internet if you thought my post was even 1/4 as negative as you try portraying it. I assure you that I won't be bothering to read any other threads you create, you illogical, ungrateful man.

Moon, I love you.

[kikidee]

Quite frankly, I don't care what you came here to hear, you get what you get on a public forum, buddy. I don't go for the guilt thing either, so your little edit means nothing to me. If you wanna live in a fantasy, feel free, I don't know you, and it's not my problem. I'll give you whatever opinion *I* feel is appropriate, if you don't like it and can't handle reality from a non-biased third party you chose to seek advice from, please feel free to block and report me, seriously, please do
You are too sensitive for the internet if you thought my post was even 1/4 as negative as you try portraying it. I assure you that I won't be bothering to read any other threads you create, you illogical, ungrateful man.

You go moon.
I also thought it was odd that he said soon would be their 3rd year anniversary, yet they're just friends? I feel like someone was playing pretend here. Anywho, I feel that everyone who said something he didnt like was simply trying to help him. I mean, this forum IS to talk to others who have expirience about LDR, so we should know. Maybe not me but others xD

[Black_Halloween]

Im getting the creepy ,stalker friend who cant move on from his feelings so he lives in a fantisy world vibe. Move on before she gets a restraining order against you.

[ThePiedPiper]

You go moon.
I also thought it was odd that he said soon would be their 3rd year anniversary, yet they're just friends? I feel like someone was playing pretend here. Anywho, I feel that everyone who said something he didnt like was simply trying to help him. I mean, this forum IS to talk to others who have expirience about LDR, so we should know. Maybe not me but others xD

Well when a girl tells you she sees you as a friend and you're convinced it's because you've only treated her "as a friend" regardless of what she says (one saying they don't love you in "THAT way" is pretty explicit, however), yes, we were only trying to be helpful, but apparently we're supposed to make people hope, not think. Haha.

[LadyDaemon]

Dude,you came to us on a PUBLIC forum to ask for advice. You posted your story and people gave their opinions on what you asked for,they were just making additional points based upon what YOU said. You don't get to pick and choose which parts we answer to and which ones we don't. On this site,we don't pull punches. We tell it like it is and I'm sorry your little feelings got hurt because you can't handle the reality of things like a man but it is what it is. You see things one way and anyone who won't tell you what you want to hear is a bad person. The reality of it is this,the woman is very obviously not attracted to you as more then a friend. I know you wish that she was,but she's clearly not. It doesn't matter if you build a fricken throne for her and treat her like a princess and act like her king or not,if she's not attracted to you then she's not and it's time to move on. Time talking and a couple visits doesn't always mean there's something there. Friends visit,get to know each others parents and talk all of the time,doesn't make it anymore then what it is. Also,there's a difference between giving up and knowing when it's just simply not going to work and moving on. Believe it or not,love doesn't conquer all. If you can't handle a dose of reality on here,I'd hate to see how you deal with it in the real world.

[Mairja]

Chances are you will never read this since you said you weren't coming back to this forum. However, I feel compelled to offer my opinion on the whole thing. And I too, agree with Moon and the others that have expressed similar opinions. You have known this woman for four years and she still sees you as a friend only - chances are that will never change, not after such a long time. You cannot force, coax or charm someone into having romantic feelings for you.

It could also very well be true that she has decided to not get romantically involved because of the distance between you two. Maybe she sees the distance and cultural differences as too difficult/impossible to overcome. In that case, I'm afraid you're just going to have to respect that, because that is her decision. Trying to force her to change her opinion will not work. Guilting her into changing her opinion will end in disaster. If she does have a change of heart, it will have to be because she wants to give the romantic relationship a chance, not because you want her to.

Lastly, I too think you are being overly sensitive in regards to the replies you have gotten in this thread. Moon was being very respectful towards you, and wishing you luck. It is a public forum, and if you cannot handle people being of a different opinion than you, or offering advice you disagree with - when it's all being done in a respectful manner - well, then you shouldn't be posting. I'm sorry, but that's the harsh truth.