For those of you who have been following up with the up and downs and the drama of our relationship, we are on a break now. We are going non-communication until October 1st. I think this will lead up to a permanent break but we've tried breaking up so often and the heightened emotions just lead us back to each other each time... I thought this may be a more calm and subdued way to deal with it. I told him he's free to date other people, but he says he won't... he'll just concentrate on his life and figuring out if we can make things work... I have no hope anymore... He took it all away from me, again. There is just so often that he can tell me he doesn't know what he wants before I have to stand up for myself and say that I DO know what I want...
Who knows, maybe the time apart will do us good, but I doubt it... I am feeling more and more detached with every passing day... I think we finally found a way to leave each other without drama or theatrics... just in a calm, gradual process...
I know the hurt will hit me later, but that is part of breaking up... I know a part of me will always love me, but I think I'll manage to not be in love with him anymore... When I think back on us, I won't idealize the relationship or concentrate on the negative. I'll see it for what it was: One of my life's big love stories that helped me define who I am. This relationship made me a better person, but I think it has reached it's end point...
I just wish I was excited to embark on the next adventure, but I'm not. I think I'll need to be alone for a while...
Who knows, maybe the time apart will do us good, but I doubt it... I am feeling more and more detached with every passing day... I think we finally found a way to leave each other without drama or theatrics... just in a calm, gradual process...
I know the hurt will hit me later, but that is part of breaking up... I know a part of me will always love me, but I think I'll manage to not be in love with him anymore... When I think back on us, I won't idealize the relationship or concentrate on the negative. I'll see it for what it was: One of my life's big love stories that helped me define who I am. This relationship made me a better person, but I think it has reached it's end point...
I just wish I was excited to embark on the next adventure, but I'm not. I think I'll need to be alone for a while...
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