This isn't really a question or advice post, it's just a ramble. 
M is set to submit his PhD thesis at the end of December.*
So, being October, and the final phase of revising and preparing for defense, he's quite stressed and occasionally gets panicky that he won't be done in time.
* HALLELUJAH. I feel like there are so many things that are just kind of "on hold" until that point, and I know he does, too. PhD be doonnnne please, so we can see what's up next as far as visits and new chapters of lives.
He's still being really awesome about us, making sure he carves out a bit of time for Skype and texts, so while it's maybe not as much time as it has been or as much as I'd like, I don't feel neglected or anything. I think it'll take a bit more patience and trust in the actual month of December, but that's a bridge to cross when we get there. But we spend most of our time having good conversation or watching movies together, it's not too much dwelling on stresses or anything, so if we can keep that up, even if it's less often because he's crazy busy, I think we'll be okay.
I'm just not sure how to continue supporting him without it seeming redundant. I feel like I'm constantly saying the same things to him, about believing in him, being proud of his work, etc.
I've read most of his thesis at this point, so I've had chances to help him out with pieces that I can, like if he just needs a sounding board or is trying to rewrite a particular paragraph or whatnot, and I know he appreciates that.
But yeah. It gets frustrating to not be there to help him with the little simple things (like making dinner because although he's a good cook, I know he doesn't always take the time to make actual meals) and to just be around without necessarily having to interact, to just be there when he does finally go to bed, etc.
Gah. Stupid PhD.
But. I'm probably just overthinking the redundancy of saying the supporting things, he may not even notice the redundancy, being just focused on work and freaking out about it, lol.
I did recently put together a little relaxation care package.. sent him some hot chocolate sticks, chocolate-chip-cookie-in-a-jar mix, a silly card, and a gift certificate for a massage at a not-girly massage place near his work. He was so appreciative and I love seeing the big grin it put on his face.
So. 3 more months of the particular brand of patience and supportiveness that comes with being a PhD partner. Ayiyi. He's lucky he's cute. :P (And sweet.... and funny... and interesting...)
M is set to submit his PhD thesis at the end of December.*
So, being October, and the final phase of revising and preparing for defense, he's quite stressed and occasionally gets panicky that he won't be done in time.
* HALLELUJAH. I feel like there are so many things that are just kind of "on hold" until that point, and I know he does, too. PhD be doonnnne please, so we can see what's up next as far as visits and new chapters of lives.
He's still being really awesome about us, making sure he carves out a bit of time for Skype and texts, so while it's maybe not as much time as it has been or as much as I'd like, I don't feel neglected or anything. I think it'll take a bit more patience and trust in the actual month of December, but that's a bridge to cross when we get there. But we spend most of our time having good conversation or watching movies together, it's not too much dwelling on stresses or anything, so if we can keep that up, even if it's less often because he's crazy busy, I think we'll be okay.
I'm just not sure how to continue supporting him without it seeming redundant. I feel like I'm constantly saying the same things to him, about believing in him, being proud of his work, etc.
I've read most of his thesis at this point, so I've had chances to help him out with pieces that I can, like if he just needs a sounding board or is trying to rewrite a particular paragraph or whatnot, and I know he appreciates that.
But yeah. It gets frustrating to not be there to help him with the little simple things (like making dinner because although he's a good cook, I know he doesn't always take the time to make actual meals) and to just be around without necessarily having to interact, to just be there when he does finally go to bed, etc.
Gah. Stupid PhD.
But. I'm probably just overthinking the redundancy of saying the supporting things, he may not even notice the redundancy, being just focused on work and freaking out about it, lol.
I did recently put together a little relaxation care package.. sent him some hot chocolate sticks, chocolate-chip-cookie-in-a-jar mix, a silly card, and a gift certificate for a massage at a not-girly massage place near his work. He was so appreciative and I love seeing the big grin it put on his face.
So. 3 more months of the particular brand of patience and supportiveness that comes with being a PhD partner. Ayiyi. He's lucky he's cute. :P (And sweet.... and funny... and interesting...)
What is your SO getting his Ph.D. in?
) sub-forum! My SO is also submitting (hopefully) in January and I just started my PhD, so the things you talk about ring bells. I wonder, is it the mentality of people that choose to do PhDs that make them focus on one thing and ignore the world for periods of time or is it the other way around? 
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