Girlfriend doesn't talk to me/engage in conversation

[snow]

ill talk to her directly and ask her whats wrong and why she isnt very talkative and doesn't really ask questions. She is not depressed as much any more and is rather happy over the last week or so. idk im just annoyed that she isn't as eager to talk to me as much as I am. like everyday when I see her online I jump right away to talk to her . im not sure maybe im expecting to much from her. I have never been in a relationship before which may have an impact

Exactly. Here we go. Instead of waiting and THEN talking to her, talk to her now!

[Spazzo246]

Ok so i just spoke to her, and she said she is just really busy, she has to manage a barn now because of her previous owner left and she has to do it all by herself. i then asked her if talking to her to much is annoying and she responded with "No no no nono", so im just gonna take it easy for now and relax

[differentcountries]

There is no such thing as "a" relationship. There is no right and wrong ammount of talking. Just tell her what you prefer and ask her how she feels and see if you can find some way of doing it that works for the both of you.

[snow]

Ok so i just spoke to her, and she said she is just really busy, she has to manage a barn now because of her previous owner left and she has to do it all by herself. i then asked her if talking to her to much is annoying and she responded with "No no no nono", so im just gonna take it easy for now and relax

I'm glad you talked to her
Sometimes you have to sit back a little and relax. I had to learn myself that sometimes my man is busy and I can't expect him to reply to everything I type to him :P
Good luck to you both!

[differentcountries]

well I understand that, but you would think that if you love someone so much as she has told me, you would at least message me asking me how my day was, i mean even when i do speak to her, she never is very talkative, over the past few days the only question she has asked me is how was my day, im not sure maybe im expecting to much from her. (we have never met in person btw and we are planning to over the next few months)

Sounds like she and maybe you ned to experiment with asking each other couple ' s questions. And perhaps meet...

[differentcountries]

[QUOTE=snow;327227]I hope that was hidden sarcasm, if not, I concur.
I don't think it's "normal" to wait for the guy to start the conversation everytime. You start the conversation when you feel like it. [/QUOTE
No it is not meant as sarcasm. I believe that it is common for there to be gender differences when it comes to initiative , especially in the start of a relationship. However it is easier if both feel comfortable initiating.

[Spazzo246]

Ok so I understand that she is busy with stuff, I leave her offline messages on facebook and she makes status updates and comments on things yet she never responses to my inboxes, the only way i can get her to respond is when she is available I send her something and she sees it. The last message is sent to her was on friday. She says she is busy with stuff yet has time to interact with her tumblr followers rather than respond to my messages, I even send her messages on tumblr right after she has reblogged something/posted just to something and still get no response. Oh and one more thing. When i send her messages on skype ahe only responds sometimes an the only way i can get a response is if i actually call her to get her attention to check if she is actually there or not. I'm just abit confused by all this and I'm not sure if she is really committed to making this work. Maybe it's because we have passed the liking/crush stage and are now bf/gf and feels secure enough to not be so interactive I'm not sure.

[rubydissolution]

She only responds when available? Meaning when she's home on her computer? That makes a lot of sense. Updating your status, commenting and checking up on tumbler, always easy to do on your phone. Fb msger isn't the most reliable via phone. If fact it glitches. If she's busy she may also not want to start a conversation over messenger. Could be another reason she only responds when available.

You are also coming off a bit clingy to me. As someone who is used to being independent, all these messages in an attempt to get her to respond would be a tid bit annoying. Back off is my advice. Give her time to breath.

[Spazzo246]

Ok, on second thought I have come to the realization that I am expecting to much from her and i coming across as very clingy/needy I think it's because I miss all the attention we gave each other just when we were getting to know each other and how we use to say sweet things all the time, just need to rethink things and apologies to her for bieng so naggy. I feel better just thinking about this. Thanks everyone for you help

[differentcountries]

My bf does not always answer to texting in Skype either. Sometimes i too have to call him, or text him on phone or Facebook, to let him know i am there even if he is logged on. I don't see the problem with that. Especially if one is on several places at a time it is not so easy to spot a message right away. You may tell her you wish for her to initiate texting more, but then you have to back off taking initiative yourself.

[silvermoonfairy3]

I think you're taking it too personally that she responds to tumblr people, or updates her status or whatever. Every free internet moment she has doesn't have to go to you. I know you understand that, but it's coming across as if you don't. "She was online, so she should have talked to me" kind of thing. Sometimes she might have a few minutes online where she wants to talk to someone else, her friends, whoever. That's okay, too. If you're upset about that because there's *no* real communication from her to you, that's a bigger problem, and maybe one to talk to her about.

I do agree with the other poster who said you're coming off a bit clingy.. it might be a good idea to just try to relax and back off a bit. Good luck!

[yeahzero]

Ok, on second thought I have come to the realization that I am expecting to much from her and i coming across as very clingy/needy I think it's because I miss all the attention we gave each other just when we were getting to know each other and how we use to say sweet things all the time, just need to rethink things and apologies to her for bieng so naggy. I feel better just thinking about this. Thanks everyone for you help

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