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    It''s over... Officially.

    The title is pretty straight forward and to the point.

    My SO and I have been having issues for several months now. We began to grow apart and began arguing a LOT. At the time I decided that I would try to work through the issues we were having. We struggled over the next several weeks and again, got to the point where although we were starting to patch things up and be a semi normal somewhat happy LDR couple again, We ended up falling right back into our old patterns. I got to the point where I was fed up. I quit calling her and I quit texting her. If she texted me, I wouldn't answer back for several hours or sometimes even a day later, if I answered back at all. When she would call, again I ignored her and only talked to her occasionally when I actually had the strength to put on a happy face and talk to her. Just for the record, so we're all clear I understand that I shouldn't of played the "quiet" game or the "I'm mad at you, so I'm going to intentionally ignore your texts and phone calls" game but it's the only way I was able to get through to her that things aren't working, put in the effort or this is it. Our nightly and daily phone calls stopped and our texting became a rarity. Anyway.. Back on point. We're officially done. I would be lying to everybody here if I told you I wasn't hurt or upset, because I am. I wish we could of worked things out and fixed the issues we were having, but we just couldn't. At the end of the day I think it came down to us being in 2 different places in our lives and having 2 different sets of needs. Which resulted in a lot of frustration and added tension for both parties. It sucks and it hurts... I really wish and hope for the best for her and her future adventures and relationships. I hope she finds happiness and I'm sorry I couldn't give her what she was looking for.
    Last edited by BigMatt93; February 4, 2014, 08:05 AM.

    #2
    I'm sorry to hear that, Matt. Be kind to yourself, and take the time you need to heal.
    Our separation of each other is an optical illusion of consciousness. ~Albert Einstein

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      #3
      I'm sorry to hear Take care of yourself.

      Comment


        #4
        It's better to break up with somebody that you are no longer happy with then stay in completely dead relationship. I hope you will take a good care of yourself now and that you'll stay on this forum, because I really liked your posts. Wish you the best!

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          #5
          I'm sorry to hear that. Take care of yourself, okay!

          Comment


            #6
            I'm sorry to hear about this
            I second what talim said, though. It's better to get out of a relationship you're unhappy with rather than stay in an unhappy relationship and be miserable.
            Hang in there

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              #7
              I'm sorry to hear this. I hope you will take time to take care of yourself and heal. Do something that makes you happy and smile and know that everything will work out in the end
              Our love story:
              Attended the same high school 2004-2007
              Dated CD: June 2009-July 2010
              Reconnected: August 2012
              Began dating LD: November 2012
              Engaged! March 2014
              Closing the distance: December 2015

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                #8
                Moon - Thank you so much. I have a lot getting ready to start going on with school and I find out next week if I get voted on to the Volunteer Fire Department to start my year long probationary period. I'm hoping between all the stuff going on with my field training for my class and if I get voted on for the Fire Department, I'm hoping they both keep me busy enough to keep my mind occupied and away from thinking about everything.

                Mellif - Thank you. I will make sure I set aside some good r&r time to take a breather and destress from it.

                Talim - I definitely plan on sticking around the forum. I've enjoyed my time here even though when I posted it wasn't under the most cheerful circumstances most times, But I enjoy it here so I don't plan on going anywhere.

                Squeeker - I will!

                Emsimes - I'm hanging in there

                Heavenly_Love12 - I most definitely will. I know I said this already.. But I have my first ride along shift with the local EMS squad tomorrow and then I have a lot going on in the next few weeks with a Saturday class this weekend and CPR renewal next week, and I also find out next week if I get to start my probationary period with the Volunteer Fire Department and then a couple weeks from now I have a 12 hour shift at the local hospital in the ER department where i'll be shadowing somebody and observing/helping out.

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                  #9
                  I'm so sorry this happened to you. I hope your heart heals soon. Good luck on the fire department. It's awesome you are willing to do that.

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                    #10
                    Matt, I sort of know what you went through. I have been going through some of the same stuff for some time.

                    First Visit: September 2016
                    Second Visit: January 2017 (Her birthday)
                    Third Visit: June 2018 (medical conference near her home)

                    John 3:16
                    For God so loved the world. That he gave his only begotten son. For whosoever believeth in him. Shall not perish but have eternal life
                    John 4:12
                    I am the way, the truth, and the life. No one comes to the Father except through me.

                    Comment


                      #11
                      It hurts every time I hear about a broken LDR but then again, if it was not meant to be, that is what you need to do. I wish you peaceful evenings of pizza, beer and sports, if you like that type of stuff. Or maybe you prefer some really good cheese and a great class of wine with a cool marathon of Elementary. Bones or Top Chef. My point is take the time and enjoy your life and whatever it is you love about it. Relish in that. When you are ready, you will find the right person to share that with. One that will enjoy your downs as well as your ups and be willing and able to take the journey with you, be it CD or LDR.
                      "Remember not only to say the right thing in the right place, but far more difficult still, to leave unsaid the wrong thing at the tempting moment. "
                      Benjamin Franklin

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                        #12
                        Piratemama - Thank you for the kind words! It'll take time but the wounds will heal. Thank you for the good luck wishes, it really means a lot! Honestly this has been one of my biggest dreams i've ever had was to be a firefighter growing up, and right now, I'm getting to live it, which I never thought I would on top of being in school for a career I'm really passionate about.

                        Chris516 - I'm sorry to hear that your going through some of the issues I was struggling with in my LDR with my SO. If you ever need anything, Feel free to inbox me. I'd be happy to help out in any possible way I can. Even if it's just somebody to talk too or lean on for some advice. I might not have an answer for everything for you, but I don't mind trying my best to help out.

                        Hollandia - Thank you so much for the support and peaceful wishes. It means a lot to me.

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                          #13
                          I don't know what to say to this, basically that this really sucks. Just the way it started to fall apart.
                          I always root for the happy ending for LDRs, but hopefully this new story of yours will have an even better one than you had planned.
                          I hope you will heal quickly from this, but of course everything takes time.
                          I wish the best for you.
                          sigpic
                          Met August 2012
                          Official Nov. 18 2012
                          Visited him in Italy August 8 2013
                          He's visiting April 7-28 2014
                          I visited: Aug. 26-Sept. 25 2014

                          Comment


                            #14
                            Originally posted by BigMatt93 View Post
                            Chris516 - I'm sorry to hear that your going through some of the issues I was struggling with in my LDR with my SO. If you ever need anything, Feel free to inbox me. I'd be happy to help out in any possible way I can. Even if it's just somebody to talk too or lean on for some advice. I might not have an answer for everything for you, but I don't mind trying my best to help out.
                            Matt, Thank you. Definitely.

                            First Visit: September 2016
                            Second Visit: January 2017 (Her birthday)
                            Third Visit: June 2018 (medical conference near her home)

                            John 3:16
                            For God so loved the world. That he gave his only begotten son. For whosoever believeth in him. Shall not perish but have eternal life
                            John 4:12
                            I am the way, the truth, and the life. No one comes to the Father except through me.

                            Comment


                              #15
                              be strong and cry if u need to.. I really dont have the best words to say. Me and my SO are going through a lot right now.

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