But its in NY! I am so happy for him, but devastated for me. This is the begining of the end.
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He got the job
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NY is where he currently lives. But he was planning to move here for the last year as soon as he found a job. Now he found an AMAZING job....but it's there (even though he applied for a position HERE).
He knows I can't continue with this. There is NO future. He won't leave this job and I can never move back to NY. SO...That's it I guess.
This has been one of the worst days of my life. Second only to when my sister died.sigpic
I love him. Forever. And every day after that.
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You will leave him because he got his dreamjob? What does he say about taking the job/waiting for another option/the future? Have you discussed your different options? If he has an amazing job already I would rather think he would have had the uppertunity to get another great job elsewhere within a few years, perhaps as a transfer within the firm if they got positions in different cities.I made love to him only twice, she thought and looked at the man laying asleep beside her. And yet still it is as if we have been together forever, as if he has always known my life, my soul, my body, my light, my pain
- Paulo Coelho, "Eleven minutes"
"Bız yüzyılın aşkı vardır" - We have dated since Sept. 2013. To see our full story, click here https://members.lovingfromadistance....and-our-visits
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I'm happy he got the job but it stinks that it's in New York! Why can't you move there? Is it possible for him to transfer to Georgia at a later time? I wouldn't give up! You've been at this for more than a year and a half and you have a good thing going! You're able to coordinate visits pretty well and able to communicate each day without problems on one end or both. I think that you should give it some more time! Nothing is set in stone and who's to say he can't negotiate to be accepted in Georgia?
I'm sorry it didn't work to where he was accepted in Georgia right away but I really think you can both make this work for awhile longer. At some point, someone will have to move or both of you move to a neutral location unless you're planning on permanently being in an LDR. It CAN and WILL happen but when it is the right time. I hope you won't give up on your relationship, you're both strong people and went through horrible events that led to meeting each other...I think you could do it!Our love story:
Attended the same high school 2004-2007
Dated CD: June 2009-July 2010
Reconnected: August 2012
Began dating LD: November 2012
Engaged! March 2014
Closing the distance: December 2015
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I'm so sorry to hear that. I'm sure you have a good reason for not being able to move out to him, and I get where you are coming from... sometimes in the situations we are in, the whole future of the relationship can hinge on that one thing that could've brought them closer to you. :/
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TaraMarie - calm down. I know LDR is not preferable, and yes this means you would be LDR for longer than you both planned. But is there really no way you can continue to make this work?
Your children are in their teens? I want to say one is 12 or so? So is it that you are looking at another 6 years....and there's absolutely no way to relocate the children? Feel free to PM me, I've been there done that. And I'm gearing up for a battle to move mine out of the country.
When we love, it isn't because the person's perfect, it's because we learn to see an imperfect person perfectly.
True love does not worry about the distance between, for the heart and soul travels through one's words
When two people are meant for each other, no time is too long, no distance is too far, and no one can ever tear them apart.
1 universe, 9 planets, 7 continents, 194 countries, 50 states and 10 provinces...and I had the privilege to meet you.
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There is NO WAY I can relocate. Nor do I want to. I left NY BECAUSE I didn't want to be there anymore. My work is here. and my youngest is 11. I will NEVER take my children from their father. And I have a BEAUTIFUL five bedroom home I will loose. He has a small three bedroom home in a terrible part of Long Island that I never want to live in. MY MOther AND SISTER MOVED HERE because I did. The PLAN was for HIM to come HERE. I am devastated.sigpic
I love him. Forever. And every day after that.
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Originally posted by Heavenly_Love12 View PostI'm happy he got the job but it stinks that it's in New York! Why can't you move there? Is it possible for him to transfer to Georgia at a later time? I wouldn't give up! You've been at this for more than a year and a half and you have a good thing going! You're able to coordinate visits pretty well and able to communicate each day without problems on one end or both. I think that you should give it some more time! Nothing is set in stone and who's to say he can't negotiate to be accepted in Georgia?
I'm sorry it didn't work to where he was accepted in Georgia right away but I really think you can both make this work for awhile longer. At some point, someone will have to move or both of you move to a neutral location unless you're planning on permanently being in an LDR. It CAN and WILL happen but when it is the right time. I hope you won't give up on your relationship, you're both strong people and went through horrible events that led to meeting each other...I think you could do it!
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Originally posted by TaraMarie View PostThere is NO WAY I can relocate. Nor do I want to. I left NY BECAUSE I didn't want to be there anymore. My work is here. and my youngest is 11. I will NEVER take my children from their father. And I have a BEAUTIFUL five bedroom home I will loose. He has a small three bedroom home in a terrible part of Long Island that I never want to live in. MY MOther AND SISTER MOVED HERE because I did. The PLAN was for HIM to come HERE. I am devastated.Our love story:
Attended the same high school 2004-2007
Dated CD: June 2009-July 2010
Reconnected: August 2012
Began dating LD: November 2012
Engaged! March 2014
Closing the distance: December 2015
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While the other posters are trying to be helpful (and nobody wants to see a breakup) I think you're making a good decision. You can't rely on hope that MAYBE one day he'll be able to move to you and uprooting children at that age, IMO, is a selfish act; not to mention your family moved to be close to you. Plus he doesn't live in a safe area.....too many negatives to be honest. I'm so sorry that this happened to you but you will find somebody one day
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