Hello.
I have returned with a new problem.
I've met a wonderful girl who lives in Spain. She's quite the fascinating person whos got a Swedish name yet known no Swedish and speaks Italian, French, Spanish and English fluently.
After having spoken to eachother for more or less two months I went to Madrid and visited her. There we spent the most wonderful 5 nights of my life. Every single second I spent in Madrid I spent with her and we never left eachothers side.
It goes without saying that the goodbye was heartwrenching and we're both dealing with the post-meeting problems. All my negative flaws has showed themselves with constant worrying about the next time we'll see eachother, where she stands on those issues and so on. We're for various reasons not officially bf/gf or officially in a relationship. We have different ways of dealing with these problems of missing eachother. I end up crying a lot and has had overall problems with readjusting to normal life. She's been trying her absolutely best to be strong for me and herself and not tried to bother me with her issues. I on the other hand has not shown the same kindness and been stupid enough to bring up some of my worries with her.
Yesterday evening and night she talked a lot about how she missed me. Saying that she wish she was in my arms, that I was there with her and that she was sad. When I asked her why she said that she just missed me.
Then today was the exact week since we last saw eachother irl. It had a huge impact on me who just moped around all day. Once again she asked me why this was so hard and that she felt sad. I then for some reason (insecurity) asked her what made her sad. She said she couldn't say that. When I then asked her if that was because it wasn't because of me that she was sad she made me really worried.
She responded saying that "I just can't deal with this. My head is about to explode. I'm trying and you...just make me feel even worse".
That was of course a major wake-up call on my part and I was appalled with myself for making her feel worse. I want to make her feel better but due to my issues I make her feel worse.
I also don't know how to interpret this. If I should take it that she can't handle it so she's not gonna continue anything with me? Or that she just wants some space right now and for me to back off for a bit. Either way with just some small talk we haven't talked more and I've left her alone.
Any thoughts on the situation? I have already called the psychiatrist and booked in a meeting with him for some help with my insecurity and worrying issues.
I should mention that she's never really had deep feelings for anyone. One of the first things she told me is that she's been like a stone that way. That is until I came and messed that up for her. Thus supposedly I'm the first one she's ever really have had deep feelings for. In other words she's new to all of this and she's never felt the way she's doing now.
I have returned with a new problem.
I've met a wonderful girl who lives in Spain. She's quite the fascinating person whos got a Swedish name yet known no Swedish and speaks Italian, French, Spanish and English fluently.
After having spoken to eachother for more or less two months I went to Madrid and visited her. There we spent the most wonderful 5 nights of my life. Every single second I spent in Madrid I spent with her and we never left eachothers side.
It goes without saying that the goodbye was heartwrenching and we're both dealing with the post-meeting problems. All my negative flaws has showed themselves with constant worrying about the next time we'll see eachother, where she stands on those issues and so on. We're for various reasons not officially bf/gf or officially in a relationship. We have different ways of dealing with these problems of missing eachother. I end up crying a lot and has had overall problems with readjusting to normal life. She's been trying her absolutely best to be strong for me and herself and not tried to bother me with her issues. I on the other hand has not shown the same kindness and been stupid enough to bring up some of my worries with her.
Yesterday evening and night she talked a lot about how she missed me. Saying that she wish she was in my arms, that I was there with her and that she was sad. When I asked her why she said that she just missed me.
Then today was the exact week since we last saw eachother irl. It had a huge impact on me who just moped around all day. Once again she asked me why this was so hard and that she felt sad. I then for some reason (insecurity) asked her what made her sad. She said she couldn't say that. When I then asked her if that was because it wasn't because of me that she was sad she made me really worried.
She responded saying that "I just can't deal with this. My head is about to explode. I'm trying and you...just make me feel even worse".
That was of course a major wake-up call on my part and I was appalled with myself for making her feel worse. I want to make her feel better but due to my issues I make her feel worse.
I also don't know how to interpret this. If I should take it that she can't handle it so she's not gonna continue anything with me? Or that she just wants some space right now and for me to back off for a bit. Either way with just some small talk we haven't talked more and I've left her alone.
Any thoughts on the situation? I have already called the psychiatrist and booked in a meeting with him for some help with my insecurity and worrying issues.
I should mention that she's never really had deep feelings for anyone. One of the first things she told me is that she's been like a stone that way. That is until I came and messed that up for her. Thus supposedly I'm the first one she's ever really have had deep feelings for. In other words she's new to all of this and she's never felt the way she's doing now.
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