His Parents...

[nemolove_22]

Your welcome.

As a parent, it is hard to let go sometimes, but when your child needs to fly the coop, you need to learn to accept this. They must also learn to allow him to "make his own mistakes", in order for him to grow into the person that he is meant to be. They cannot take care of him for the rest of his life so they need to allow him to be self sufficient to stand on his own two feet. I would try mentioning these things to them in a calm matter and explain that is is willing to pay his own way to continue the communication if needed to show he is being adult and responsible about it in a mature way. I hope this helps and they see the light, even if they feel an LDR is doomed that should his decision and they cannot prevent him from going through heartache throughout his life, no parents can, nor should they.

If the laptop is his, it is also theft for them to take it. Something that they should be ashamed of themselves for doing. That is not a good example to set for your child and ironically somewhat juvenile.

He is working on getting a better job that pays much better than the one that he has now, but he's in the beginnings of finding that job. It is something he is willing to fight for and to show that he's serious about this. Neither of us is happy about what's happened, but it's just a matter of finding a way of at least getting his parents to

I don't know if the laptop is his though - I'm assuming (bad me). I can ask him.

They may feel it's doomed - both him and I don't. We're so willing to try. And you're right, they need to let us try instead of controlling us. We'll get through to them. In a calm, adult like manner that's not immature or childish.
I may also be moving not necessarily to him but I'll be WAY closer in a couple years - only a couple of hours by train away, instead of across the country. Sure it's a couple years and he knows it may not happen, but it's out there as a possibility.

[Hollandia]

He is working on getting a better job that pays much better than the one that he has now, but he's in the beginnings of finding that job. It is something he is willing to fight for and to show that he's serious about this. Neither of us is happy about what's happened, but it's just a matter of finding a way of at least getting his parents to

I don't know if the laptop is his though - I'm assuming (bad me). I can ask him.

They may feel it's doomed - both him and I don't. We're so willing to try. And you're right, they need to let us try instead of controlling us. We'll get through to them. In a calm, adult like manner that's not immature or childish.
I may also be moving not necessarily to him but I'll be WAY closer in a couple years - only a couple of hours by train away, instead of across the country. Sure it's a couple years and he knows it may not happen, but it's out there as a possibility.

You might even ask him to suggest his parents take a look at this forum and see how so many of us have made the LDR work. Many get married, move in together and have babies. Also, you two are in the same country with no visas or immigration to worry about so really in this day of age, it is quite doable.

[nemolove_22]

You might even ask him to suggest his parents take a look at this forum and see how so many of us have made the LDR work. Many get married, move in together and have babies. Also, you two are in the same country with no visas or immigration to worry about so really in this day of age, it is quite doable.

Oh, yeah another good idea! Find a way to show them that it is doable. ^_^ It won't be easy, but it's doable.

[Hollandia]

Oh, yeah another good idea! Find a way to show them that it is doable. ^_^ It won't be easy, but it's doable.

It is indeed. I was 3800 miles apart, with a different country and a different language and we made it work.

[nemolove_22]

It is indeed. I was 3800 miles apart, with a different country and a different language and we made it work.

That's great!
I'm bilingual myself - but we do have English as a common language.

[Hollandia]

That's great!
I'm bilingual myself - but we do have English as a common language.

Yes, sorry, I said that wrong. He speaks English too, I was more referring to when I am here in Holland. Many speak English but going to the grocery store alone I have run into plenty that don't. I studied Dutch for over a year and feel I have hit a wall, but in the end, totally worth it.

[nemolove_22]

Yes, sorry, I said that wrong. He speaks English too, I was more referring to when I am here in Holland. Many speak English but going to the grocery store alone I have run into plenty that don't. I studied Dutch for over a year and feel I have hit a wall, but in the end, totally worth it.

Ah, got ya! That's good that it's worked out. ^_^
Any little bit helps even if it is just the basics, I've realized. ^_^ And you can only go up from there.
I know that my boy is interested in learning American sign language, which is my other language I know.
It'll be slow going, but I find it awesome that he wants to learn.

[Hollandia]

Ah, got ya! That's good that it's worked out. ^_^
Any little bit helps even if it is just the basics, I've realized. ^_^ And you can only go up from there.
I know that my boy is interested in learning American sign language, which is my other language I know.
It'll be slow going, but I find it awesome that he wants to learn.

Perhaps this will help his parents see how committed he is in this relationship too.

[nemolove_22]

Perhaps this will help his parents see how committed he is in this relationship too.

Perhaps. Although he wants me to teach him and we need Skype for that - now to get him off to that internet cafe so I can start to slowly teach him bit by bit. ^_^

[nemolove_22]

So apparently his parents realized that what they had done wasn't right, and have decided to back off a bit.

[JaneEmily]

So apparently his parents realized that what they had done wasn't right, and have decided to back off a bit.

Glad to hear. I hope they give you a chance with getting to know you.

[Hollandia]

So apparently his parents realized that what they had done wasn't right, and have decided to back off a bit.

That is great news and can only help him keep a healthy relationship with his parents and hopefully at some point, you with them. You might also ask to see if they would like to "meet" you and/or your parents via Skype. It makes things feel so much more real once you have face time with someone and also makes it seem much more doable.

[nemolove_22]

Glad to hear. I hope they give you a chance with getting to know you.

Yeah, I hope so too!

That is great news and can only help him keep a healthy relationship with his parents and hopefully at some point, you with them. You might also ask to see if they would like to "meet" you and/or your parents via Skype. It makes things feel so much more real once you have face time with someone and also makes it seem much more doable.

Because of my internet at the moment (I live in the middle of nowhere and the internet is kinda iffy at times), Skype doesn't totally work with me. But as soon as I can find a connection that I don't have to worry about dropping on me, I'm totally going to see if he feels like that would help any.

[Hollandia]

There are not super cheap but perhaps you could find one of these on sale through Amazon.

https://wi-fi-booster-review.toptenreviews.com/

https://www.amazon.com/s/ref=nb_sb_s...wifi%20booster

Good Luck!

[nemolove_22]

There are not super cheap but perhaps you could find one of these on sale through Amazon.

https://wi-fi-booster-review.toptenreviews.com/

https://www.amazon.com/s/ref=nb_sb_s...wifi%20booster

Good Luck!

If my parents had a router those would work. My mom has issues, but it's ok.
We'll find a way around it.
At least we're not being rail roaded by his parents anymore.

Thank you!