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    #1

    Fights, Jealousy And Arguments

    Hi there! Im Dianne, 25 years old. I am currently working in Hong Kong and I met a guy thru facebook about over a year ago. He is from the United States and is only 19. We've been together for over a year and things are just so different now. Things are really hard to handle already. We have been constantly arguing and fighting about so many things. Even the little things we argue. I dont remember the last time but Im sure we werent like this before. He is so cold to me and I felt the need to do the same thing. We both freak out even to an extent where we are already shouting to each other. We have never met yet and I honestly dont know if we will be able to finally meet up nextyear. i am leaving for Canada ina few months and he said he will come and see me. Altho I feel a little doubtful because he's been to jail so many times in the past months and have pending tickets he needs to settle. He did some violations and went to jail several times. He works right now but I am not even sure if he is saving. He lives with his dad or sometimes goes to.his aunts place. Basically he doesnt have his own space yet. I feel so confused now. I feel like I have no future with him. I asked
    for a breakup so many times but I always end up staying because he promise me this and that and I jist couldnt leave amymore. I fell in love with him but then I have this doubt in my heart about how my life could be if I ever stay with him. Ive been constantlyhurting and crying because we are always fighting. Please help me. I dont know what else to do. He changed so bad now. He yells at me just message and calls me if he wqnts to. but when i wanna break up he doesnt want to and say its not the best thing tk do if i wanna fix things with him. my desire to change the situation is there but then its just not happening. Also i saw him ln facebook always searching for a particular girl kn a daily basis. he said im his one and only and he loves me only but thats not what i feel. i domt feel him anymore. i feel so
    alone. please helpme. He said he changed the lastime because i am nagger demanding and always breaking up everytime.is it really me?
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    #2
    I am not sure I understand what the disagreements are about. Is it that your 19 year old jailbird can't prove to you he could make the time /money to see you in Canada?
    I made love to him only twice, she thought and looked at the man laying asleep beside her. And yet still it is as if we have been together forever, as if he has always known my life, my soul, my body, my light, my pain
    - Paulo Coelho, "Eleven minutes"



    "Bız yüzyılın aşkı vardır" - We have dated since Sept. 2013. To see our full story, click here https://members.lovingfromadistance....and-our-visits

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      #3
      I read until "he has been in jail so many times". Dump him. Find someone more responsible who is willing to do the right thing and be with you.

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        #4
        If you are not happy in the relationship, he can't force you to stay. You are obviously not getting what you need and he is not trying. Going to jail "a couple times" should be a red flag for you, especially when it was for violence. Who says he won't hit you in the future, if he is already yelling at you?

        Relationship began: 05/22/2012
        First Met: 03/21/2013 - 03/30/2013
        Second Visit: 06/06/2013 - 08/21/2013 ~ Proposal: 07/06/2013 ♥
        Third Visit: 10/09/2013 - 01/08/2013
        Closed the distance: 11/20/2014 ♥
        Married: 1/24/2015
        Became Resident: 9/14/2015

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          #5
          Why are you wasting your time with this guy?
          If you are fighting all the time when you haven't even met, I can't understand the point of the relationship.

          Comment

            #6
            You fight ! He's been to jail, what's the point of staying ? Sounds like he has growing up to do. Just dump him.

            Comment

              #7
              Going to jail doesn't mean somone's an irredeemably terrible person. However, it does mean that something in their life has to change drastically. It seems like he's not willing or able to make that change, if this is the way he treats you already. He is in no place to lead a relationship if he can't take care of himself and his issues. Leave him to his problems and look for someone who can treat you the way you deserve!

              ~
              It'll take a lot more than words and guns
              A whole lot more than riches and muscle
              The hands of the many must join as one
              And together we'll cross the river

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                #8
                You don't need this hassle in your life. It's bad for your health and stresses you out for no reason. If he's going to keep this up, which to me looks frankly like emotional blackmail in a sense, then it's going to ruin you. Get yourself out, before it gets even worse. Trust me, this won't end well, but at least with a break up you'll be better off being single than with this guy.

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                  #9
                  Get out if this. Run away. You deserve a lot better than this.

                  Defriend him, block him, delete his number, email etc. He sounds like a heap of trouble. He should not be talking to you like this or yelling at you and calling you a nagger.

                  It going to be hard and painful for a while, but please just cut this guy off. You deserve better.

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                    #10
                    yup agree with other people - just move on...

                    many ways to block his communication so he can't stalk you either - but do not allow yourself to be persuaded. tell him it is over, and block him there and then

                    Comment

                      #11
                      ok i would break up. he's obviously on a different page then you if he's looking for a girl, going to jail verbally abusing you and making you feel bad. it's time to go honey. i'm sorry. this is going to be better once you see it for what it is

                      Comment

                        #12
                        We argue so much about almost everything. He's always finding something wrong in what I do. Sometimes he even twist the argument and make it seem like it's my fault. For example, he is with his friends drinking and he would not message me when I'm online or that he would not pick up the phone while I'm calling him. the moment I would leave my phone he wud call and i fi fail to answer he wud say so many things like im ignoring him. etc etc.. for almost two months now I dont remember going to bed and waking up feeling happy. i wud lways go to bed crying then wake up to an argument again. but when i feel so exhausted amd wants to break up he wud cry and tell me he loves me so much that he dont want me to go that giving up is never a solution. then i end up staying again but not even 24 hours passed we were arguing again. its like a routine alredy.

                        Comment

                          #13
                          Originally posted by DianneBetsy18 View Post
                          We argue so much about almost everything. He's always finding something wrong in what I do. Sometimes he even twist the argument and make it seem like it's my fault. For example, he is with his friends drinking and he would not message me when I'm online or that he would not pick up the phone while I'm calling him. the moment I would leave my phone he wud call and i fi fail to answer he wud say so many things like im ignoring him. etc etc.. for almost two months now I dont remember going to bed and waking up feeling happy. i wud lways go to bed crying then wake up to an argument again. but when i feel so exhausted amd wants to break up he wud cry and tell me he loves me so much that he dont want me to go that giving up is never a solution. then i end up staying again but not even 24 hours passed we were arguing again. its like a routine alredy.
                          read that back to yourself, if a friend said what you just wrote, what would you tell them to do?

                          Leave, block him, and do not look back - or just block him and ignore him if you don't want to tell him outright. but this relationship is toxic for you, and you need to get out of it, now!

                          Comment

                            #14
                            What is with all the blocking? Sounds to me like an unhealthy relationship, but you can also just not pick up the phone.
                            I made love to him only twice, she thought and looked at the man laying asleep beside her. And yet still it is as if we have been together forever, as if he has always known my life, my soul, my body, my light, my pain
                            - Paulo Coelho, "Eleven minutes"



                            "Bız yüzyılın aşkı vardır" - We have dated since Sept. 2013. To see our full story, click here https://members.lovingfromadistance....and-our-visits

                            Comment

                              #15
                              i was in a relationship like this. it's a control issue and you need to get out fast

                              Comment

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