Need some advice

[p_b82]

I use 'Vanishes' when my GF does it, and she does it a lot typically over weekends. Never anything to red flag thing, but it can be annoying - but I have learnt to just let it go. (with her kids and dog and everything else, sometimes she just needs to focus on them or herself for a while)

Don't send a message 'offline' that you want an immediate response to, wait til they are around always helps, and don't let the mind wander.

My worry is that she is ok, not that she is doing something I would not wish her to, but she got to her 30's, with her kids all fine before I came along, and I know she is perfectly capable of looking after herself, even if I want to wrap her in a layer of cotton wool and send her out again, just to be on the safe side lol

[Petals]

I agree. I pretty much know his routine. And maybe I shouldn't react so strongly. I am a trusting person but my mind gets away from me sometimes. His excuses aren't giving any red flags. It's just hard to deal with when I feel like I always try to take and respond to his calls.

Thanks for your advice! It has helped me a bunch!

Well, if you know his routine, then you should definitely find ways to distract yourself when this happens. You can also try sending him a cute pic or something he would like when he's unresponsive, rather than saying something like "hey, where are you" "are you ok" "I tried calling you." When my fiancé doesn't contact me at his normal times - I just send him cute pics of something I'm doing or a pic of us when we were doing something fun, goofy or romantic just as a little nudge.

It is not confrontational and gives you guys something to start a conversation about.

[Erzolisae]

I freak out about this stuff all the time.
Especially when I just got back from visiting him.
I send him messages and he doesn't respond or he responds in a weird way (which I interpret the wrong way)
Then I spend the whole time being sad thinking off all kinds of doom scenarios.
When he finally replies to my messages, there's a perfectly explainable reason for everything and I have been overreacting waaaay to much.

If you find out how to handle that stuff, let me know. Because I'm struggling with it as well

Jaac, this is exactly what happens to me. I am trying to not let my mind go to the negative. This forum has helped me put those weird feelings into perspective! Thank goodness!

[Erzolisae]

This helps so much! I feel the same as you, I guess I need to try and let it go. Glad you have been able to be ok with it. I spoke with my SO and he explained that life sometimes just happens. I do understand. Thanks again! It is so helpful!

[Erzolisae]

I use 'Vanishes' when my GF does it, and she does it a lot typically over weekends. Never anything to red flag thing, but it can be annoying - but I have learnt to just let it go. (with her kids and dog and everything else, sometimes she just needs to focus on them or herself for a while)

Don't send a message 'offline' that you want an immediate response to, wait til they are around always helps, and don't let the mind wander.

My worry is that she is ok, not that she is doing something I would not wish her to, but she got to her 30's, with her kids all fine before I came along, and I know she is perfectly capable of looking after herself, even if I want to wrap her in a layer of cotton wool and send her out again, just to be on the safe side lol

This helps so much! I feel the same as you, I guess I need to try and let it go. Glad you have been able to be ok with it. I spoke with my SO and he explained that life sometimes just happens. I do understand. Thanks again! It is so helpful!