Just a update. Not much going on, He still is distant but we are spending a little time together when "HE" wants us too. I don't want to overthink, but he did post a pic on face book and twitter yesterday showing of his body. Something he has never done before. Kind of mad me feel sick to see it, noticed a few of his exs liked it on face book and commented on how hot he was. I'm just trying to not rock the boat and see how this holiday plays out.
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A relationship is between two parties. Both sides have to be willing to give a little and compromise. You do that with friends so why wouldn't you with a romantic relationship?
Right now, he has all the control and he knows it. He knows you are afraid to lose him and for the relationship to end. He's using it to his every advantage. Trust me, I was in a relationship like this for a long time. It doesn't end well. This relationship between the two of you just doesn't sound healthy at all.To those who dream, nothing is ever far away.
Distance is to love as wind is to fire. It blows out the little ones and fans the big ones.
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Again, I am agreeing with R&R... Some of the things he has been doing may be ok if it was that thing only, but adding them all up........ He is in control and is pretty much controlling you and your emotions it seems. Doing things you don't like, asking a friend to come visit with him, etc. I think it is time to step back a bit. Keep your self respect and be true to yourself with how you feel. Relationships take two people and, in a ldr, tons of good communication.Comment
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O i have stepped back quit a bit. I am not texting him till he texts me first. I am not calling him till he calls me first. I have been going out with friends and having fun, even made some new friends because of all this. I'm making sure he knows i have my own life and that i'm not going to just wait around for him to give me his left over time. I think i lost my self in this relationship, and started to discover who i am again. I don't need him to be happy. I'm taking back control. And if he don't like it and ends it. O well... I will hurt and i'm sure i will cry for a few days, but life will go on, and in time i will be great.Comment
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I totally agree. Dont sit around to wait for him.
Sometimes it is as simple as not being too available. Get genuinely busy. Make them miss you.I made love to him only twice, she thought and looked at the man laying asleep beside her. And yet still it is as if we have been together forever, as if he has always known my life, my soul, my body, my light, my pain
- Paulo Coelho, "Eleven minutes"
"Bız yüzyılın aşkı vardır" - We have dated since Sept. 2013. To see our full story, click here https://members.lovingfromadistance....and-our-visitsComment
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I was very happy to read this. Good for you!!!Originally posted by Ripstar View PostTo those who dream, nothing is ever far away.
Distance is to love as wind is to fire. It blows out the little ones and fans the big ones.
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I love love love this. If you had said you were doing it to get back at him, or to make him see what it's like or try to make hi miss you, I would have had to smack youOriginally posted by Ripstar View Post
. That you are finding yourself again, is a great thing. Good for you !!
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Well we talked, he said he was just not feeling it any more. That's why he was never around. He said he grew apart from me and i said ya that happens if you give someone no time. Relationships need to grow and he just didn't want to try any more. His excuse was becasue we had arguments sometimes and could not let them go He also was upset about how eazy i got over them and he didnt at the time. I explained that was because of him pulling away and shutting me out when we needed to talk and fix us.
I kind of felt like i was a shell for him to help him grow and learn what love is, and he grew out of me... Like i said He was a introvert and now a extrovert. He said i made him feel better about him self. That before me, he just wanted to play video games and be alone. Now he even likes how he looks because i made him feel good about his looks he said.. So ya i feel a little used.
He was going to wait till after are Christmas visit to end US. I'm glad i called him and told him we ether need to work on us or end it. I would of spent so much money I'm glad i didn't make that mistake. I am Going to use that money on something nice for me
He said that he will always love me, and is worried he would someday regret letting me go. He asked if we could stay friends and i said OK but give me time so i can heal. He also said he would like to keep the option open to someday try again. I told him i don't know, ill be his friend and we would see what happens at that place and time. I told him if i have found someone before that, don't expect me to give that up for him.
So now I'm just going to rest and cry and get it all out and start to heal. I know it will take time he was someone i loved a lot and wanted to be my life mate, but it will get better. Just will take time.
Thanks everyone on hear for all the posts and love. made this a lot easier on me. Hope you all have amazing LDR and great lives.Comment
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As much as it sucks, I think you needed this. And, I'm honestly very happy that you know what you want and you know what you are and are not willing to settle for. The fact that you told him you would still be friends, but would like time to heal is superb. Even more so is you telling him that you don't know about keeping the door open for him for another try, and that if you meet someone else before he comes to his senses, that you're not going to give up what you have for what you had. I really love that you know yourself enough and are brave enough to say that to him. Too many times I see people who do the exact opposite and just end getting hurt.
I hope you do well, and you are more than welcome to still be a member here and join in on discussions. I feel like you'd be a great person to give advice because you are very realistic and logical, and honest. Also, we're always here to help give you advice or support when you need it. Take care of yourself. 
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I will stick around and gladly help anyone i can. This forum helped so much! I could never just vanish. Part of my online life now
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Be good to yourself, especially now, and remember your worth. I hope things work out for you in the future
~
It'll take a lot more than words and guns
A whole lot more than riches and muscle
The hands of the many must join as one
And together we'll cross the riverComment
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