Glad you found your voice. Figure out what is acceptable and unacceptable for you and make those your ground rules. When unacceptable behavior pops up, don't accept unacceptable behavior.
What I mean by this is that I spent nearly a year in a relationship with a woman who insisted on keeping me a secret. Her keeping me a secret enabled me to feel small, not important, and not a priority. I allowed that mindset to seep from our relationship into my concept of my own self worth. A friend told me that I prostituted my self worth (by allowing the woman to define me - by keeping me a secret.) That was the beginning of the end of us. When I saw that I had tolerated unacceptable behavior and that I would no longer tolerate unacceptable behavior is when I finally broke up with her.
Hell, I've had plenty of girlfriends who were proud to call me their partner, proud to introduce me to family and friends, proud to take me out. Plenty! Who in the hell is this person that I was sticking around who wanted to keep me a secret? When I finally saw that perspective and reminded myself that PLENTY of people would be (had been) proud to call me their girlfriend, it reminded me that there were so many folks out there worthy of my time.
Make yourself a priority and remember your self worth.
What I mean by this is that I spent nearly a year in a relationship with a woman who insisted on keeping me a secret. Her keeping me a secret enabled me to feel small, not important, and not a priority. I allowed that mindset to seep from our relationship into my concept of my own self worth. A friend told me that I prostituted my self worth (by allowing the woman to define me - by keeping me a secret.) That was the beginning of the end of us. When I saw that I had tolerated unacceptable behavior and that I would no longer tolerate unacceptable behavior is when I finally broke up with her.
Hell, I've had plenty of girlfriends who were proud to call me their partner, proud to introduce me to family and friends, proud to take me out. Plenty! Who in the hell is this person that I was sticking around who wanted to keep me a secret? When I finally saw that perspective and reminded myself that PLENTY of people would be (had been) proud to call me their girlfriend, it reminded me that there were so many folks out there worthy of my time.
Make yourself a priority and remember your self worth.
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