Hi, I'm 21 and my boyfriend and I have been together for 8 months and known each for 9. I moved in with him when we got together, we are in college and he just graduated so he's moving back home to start work tomorrow. I'll be staying 6 hours away from him in his apt for two months until I graduate.. Then when I do I'll move back in with him.. I'm really scared the distance is going to break us up. And I'm scared he's going to cheat with his ex since a little over a month ago I cought him sexting her and saying he can't wait to see her after graduation. He promised he wouldn't talk to her anymore after I threatened to leave him and as far as I know he hasn't but also his family is really close to her and his sister is her best friend... I'm so upset because of this, I hope he doesn't cheat on me with her or anything like that.. It's really bothering me and keeping me down. Any advice?!
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He's moving away for two months
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I think that since you caught him sexting with his ex, you have bigger problems than the distance. A relationship where the only reason you trust someone not to cheat on you is because you can keep physical tabs on them is not based on trust. In fact, if it were me the sexting would already be cheating and I wouldn't put up with that.
I am so sorry to tell you this, but maybe in the two months you will be apart you should think about a "Plan B" where you don't move in with him after you graduate. I know it's not what you want to hear, but the way I see it he's already breached your trust and started making plans to meet up with his ex.So, here you are
too foreign for home
too foreign for here.
Never enough for both.
Ijeoma Umebinyuo, Diaspora Blues
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He wants to have his cake and eat it too. Sexing is cheating. If you doubt his faithfulness, I would not move there with him. I would also be thinking about a Plan B and make sure he understands if he wants a life with you, this type of stuff is not acceptable and never will be.
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Originally posted by Stacciii View PostHe and I have talked about it a lot but I'm really paranoid about her, he knows how I feel and he knows I'm scared he's gunna cheat.. He also says he scared I'm going to cheat bc I go to an all guy's school
You have to think about yourself and your future.
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I'm sorry, but you're in a pretty unhealthy relationship right now Nobody should have to be so worried over two little months of being away from each other. He sexted his ex, he told her he can't wait to see her, and then puts guilt on you for the school you go to. Do you see the problem here? You have to think about what's best for you and what makes you happy, and I don't think that the answer is your relationship. Maybe it can be saved with A LOT of communication and commitment, but there's no guarantee, and you have to ask yourself if it's worth it.
Two months is nothing, it shouldn't be much more than a blip on your radar, but the amount of stress and worry it's giving you says everything. Please think about that, good luck.Our separation of each other is an optical illusion of consciousness. ~Albert Einstein
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When it comes to long distance, I believe that there are two types of people: the ones who are in it for the long-hall and the ones who don't love their partner enough for the sacrifices. That may be harsh and not everyone may fall into one of those two categories, but I hate when people say that they aren't cut out for long distance. No one thinks they are until they don't have a choice and then they make it work because they love their SO enough to make it work.
Here's where the harsh part comes in: if your SO can't make LD work for two months without cheating on you, then he doesn't love you enough. As Moon said, two months is nothing. If he can't go two months apart from you without hooking up with his ex, then what does that say about your relationship and his respect and love for you? It means that you don't mean enough to him. I'm sorry to tell you that, but there are a ton of us on here that go months and years at a time without seeing our SO's and we manage to keep it in our pants because we choose to because we love our SO's.
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Originally posted by MissingMyDutchLove View PostWhen it comes to long distance, I believe that there are two types of people: the ones who are in it for the long-hall and the ones who don't love their partner enough for the sacrifices.
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