I really dislike when he doesn't text?

[MehMehMeh2013]

This is my 1st LDR, we haven't known each other for very long and just recently made it official. I have met him and we saw each other for a month before he moved away. Anyways we do text everyday, but his habit of dropping off the texts is kinda driving me up the wall. We do Skype (for an hour or more), but it is a struggle for me not having him here. Can I talk to him about this? I do not blow up his phone and occasionally send a 2nd text. He did this when I 1st met him as well, so I'm wondering if he just isn't a great texter. My concern is him losing interest because that happened previously and my ex didn't have the balls to admit that. by the way I trust him as he hasn't done anything to break that trust. Kinda funny tho, he sometimes does notice when I take quite a while to text back. Btw I do have my own life, a friend group, my job and just things that I do for myself. He says he truly cares for me and wants me, he was the one who wanted to be exclusive.

[aoitori]

How long have you been apart now? I remember very well the first months apart were hell for me, I couldn't sleep well, because I would constantly stare at my phone waiting for a text. All I can say is, it got better the longer we were apart (roughly 6 months now), because you realize there are other things you need to do and your partner wouldn't want you to become sick for them. We are giving each other freedom to do whatever we want. I think you should communicate it openly. I had the same thoughts, because my ex LDR boyfriend also became disinterested after a while (and found someone close-by, which is another story...). I trust my SO 100%, but what if he becomes bored and leaves me for this?! I told him what had happened with my ex and that I might sometimes say "I love you" once too often because I don't want to loose him. He understands and I felt very good talking about it. Normally we tell each other things like "I'm going out with friends tonight, sorry I won't reply as fast." or "I've been at the gym, now I have time for you." You just have to find a rythm you both feel comfortable with. We text a lot even after 6 months (overall 10 months of daily texting) and when we're out of words, we just send emoji. Maybe your partner is not the texting type, tell him about your insecurities and chances are he'll also open up to you how he feels about it. Good luck!

[MehMehMeh2013]

Its only been a couple of weeks, the thing is he doesn't let me know after taking hours to answer back, only sometimes. When we do skype we go for an hour or more and I can tell he cares abt me. As I said when I 1st met he wasn't a great texter, but always paid tons of attention to me when we were together. I just don't want to invest in a person who isn't going to invest and I will just be left picking up the pieces. My 1st relationship wasn't LD, but after a little while I felt the distance even though we saw each other everyday.

[C.C.]

What I hate the most is waiting for a while without knowing what's going on or when it's gonna end.
I just suck at waiting that way. I'd wait for days without talking if I knew I had to beforehand. But sometimes even an hour makes me feel awful if he disappears suddenly or something.

My SO has that habit as well, though it happens more rarely and involves shorter amounts of times, and I can assure you in his case it has nothing to do with caring/not caring. Sometimes life happens and he has to go, and generally he just sucks about finding a moment to tell me beforehand.

After it happens, my SO usually apologises and while hearing those circumstances I always realise once again that it's his own flaw not something related to me.

So, just go and talk to him, I don't think it's much to ask for someone to let you know when they are going/busy. Don't do it with accusatory tone, though. And while it might not even improve, at least you'll be able to understand it better and see where it's coming from, whether it's your SO's natural behaviour or something related to you specifically. I doubt the later one though, but being reassured is never bad :3

side note: I don't think anyone has to warn the other every time before going. In my case, hearing that's there's a situation that might require him to do so is enough (like him having guests, for example, etc) And you can't do anything about unexpected situations either. But it's noticeable when it becomes a habit.

[artemis]

If you feel irritated about it,I think the best way is to talk about it calmly....He will understand that there is already a distance between you and you have the need to feel him more closer to you.....I have the same problem,sometimes my boyfriend will only text me good night because of work but when i tell him that we shouldnt be like that he always fixes it

[differentcountries]

I cant remember a time where he has NOT dropped off texting. I usually dont set aside an evening or night to talk to him unless we arranged it. I will do my things and when his texts stops, I know he is buisy doing something. I mean, if he texts it means he is awake, and if he is awake, he is at work. So, we must always be prepared for him to take care of his guests. I come 2nd place to his job and that is how it has to be. Very seldom, I will get insecure and interpet him dropping off as him not caring. I will usually let him know that I really miss him, so that he gets a chance to reassure me. July is always hard for us, because mid season he really has very little spare time and we cant even Skype. Sometimes life is like that - not perfect. That doesn't mean that the love is not there.

[R&R]

I cant remember a time where he has NOT dropped off texting. I usually dont set aside an evening or night to talk to him unless we arranged it. I will do my things and when his texts stops, I know he is buisy doing something. I mean, if he texts it means he is awake, and if he is awake, he is at work. So, we must always be prepared for him to take care of his guests. I come 2nd place to his job and that is how it has to be. Very seldom, I will get insecure and interpet him dropping off as him not caring. I will usually let him know that I really miss him, so that he gets a chance to reassure me. July is always hard for us, because mid season he really has very little spare time and we cant even Skype. Sometimes life is like that - not perfect. That doesn't mean that the love is not there.

This is my experience too. He may send a text before he goes to start a job and won't be back by his phone for 3 or 4 hours or longer. It's not unusual to get a good morning text and then not hear from him until that night. The only time there is probably every a "good bye" is at night when we go to bed. I'll send him a good night (knowing he's probably fast asleep in his chair) and then he'll respond when he wakes up and moves from the chair to the bed.

[MehMehMeh2013]

He has apologized a couple times, but a lot of times I'm left w/a long response or none w/out any explanation. We do skype once a week for an hour or more, but his lack of texting makes me doubt how committed he is. He was the one who said he would be the one texting/calling/skyping. The funny thing is the one time I wasn't responding due to being busy he sent me a text wondering if I was busy.