closing the distance dilemas

[ali-lhar]

So we are closing the distance in October and I'm so excited.
I am moving to his

but it's just a few little bits

he's doesn't want me to join the gym and that was going to be my thing
like normally you have a evening out with friends and obviously he will still have that, i just thought it would be my go to instead of putting myself in a situation where i feel stuck or isolated

i just refuse to let this not work it's all i've wanted, now i'm jumping

has anyone got any other ideas on what i can do instead?


we're getting a puppy so i think he'll help loads as i can just escape with him when i'm home on my own...he's going to be the cutest

[R&R]

So we are closing the distance in October and I'm so excited.
I am moving to his

but it's just a few little bits

he's doesn't want me to join the gym and that was going to be my thing
like normally you have a evening out with friends and obviously he will still have that, i just thought it would be my go to instead of putting myself in a situation where i feel stuck or isolated

i just refuse to let this not work it's all i've wanted, now i'm jumping

has anyone got any other ideas on what i can do instead?


we're getting a puppy so i think he'll help loads as i can just escape with him when i'm home on my own...he's going to be the cutest

Why doesn't he want you to go go the gym? It's good for you, it gets you out and about and exercise is good. You're moving to a new place and he should be happy that you are already getting out and doing things.

[ali-lhar]

he thinks they're quite pervy

[sasad]

Umm. That's silly tbh. I understand if the area is bad or something, but to tell me I couldn't go because He doesn't want it is just not right. That's a little bit of a control freak imho.

[ali-lhar]

he really isn't controlling

[R&R]

Umm. That's silly tbh. I understand if the area is bad or something, but to tell me I couldn't go because He doesn't want it is just not right. That's a little bit of a control freak imho.

I have to agree with sasad on this. Telling you where you can and can't go due to his impressions or comfort level is controlling. If you are comfortable there and have no issues, he needs to trust you.

[C.C.]

The ladies are right.
And the key factor is your own comfort.
I wanted to go to a concert this year over here, but my best friend told me that the people going there weren't the best kind of bunch and the place wasn't too best either. So I decided not to go.
Maybe not the best example, but what I described above is an ok behaviour, giving someone and advice that it's not a good idea to do something AND giving them a choice to decide what to do. If he didn't do that then it really is controlling.

[Moon]

After reading your post a few times, am I right in thinking the gym was where you were planning to find friends and start a social life? If so, that's probably not the best place for that, honestly. Something like Meetup would be a better place to find people you have things in common with in your new area. That said, I wouldn't be OK with anyone telling me I couldn't join a gym, in fact it might even be a deal-breaker for me. Do not let yourself get isolated when you move, get out and about, and should your bf have issues with that, it's a huge red flag. Keep in mind we're only looking out for you here.