Hi all
I have/had been in a LDR for 5 months and things seemed perfect, despite the distance. Then in the 6th month he suddenly changed - became less attentive, stood me up on phone calls became less responsive to texts. I do believe he had been very busy at work not sure if that was the reason for the change in behaviour or something else. As far as I'm aware my behaviour has not changed.
In essence last time I got him on the call I asked what was going on and if (a) his feelings have changed and (b) he wants relationship to continue, and he answers "I don't know" to both. Then he says he needed time to sort out some stuff and hangs up. To make matters worse I asked him these questions while we were both in the same town (we both come from the same home town and happened to be there at the same time). I wanted to meet him in person but he wasn't setting a date with me. However he knew I was coming and knew I was there.
We never met up after that call. I've heard nothing from him since but nor have I contacted him due to his request for time. It's now been a month. My friends are saying to take his silence and the fact that he didn't catch up with me while I was in town as closure and to move on but I'm finding it very difficult to do so, especially when the change seemed to happen overnight.
So I'm told the reasons why this happens is that (a) he met someone else (b) the relationship got serious and he realises he's just not that into me or (c) something happened at work / life that caused him to cut me off (unrelated to me). He's not used to expressing his feelings and but is a good guy.
While I'm hurt and confused, deep down I'm still hoping the reason is (c) and that he was just (and still is) overwhelmed. For those more experienced than I, and based on what I've written, I am wondering if there's still any value in contacting him to ask for an explanation or at least try to clear the air. There is a loving from a distance blog post that suggests there may be some value in doing so (titled "He says he lost the feelings he had for me").
Any advice appreciated, thanks.
I have/had been in a LDR for 5 months and things seemed perfect, despite the distance. Then in the 6th month he suddenly changed - became less attentive, stood me up on phone calls became less responsive to texts. I do believe he had been very busy at work not sure if that was the reason for the change in behaviour or something else. As far as I'm aware my behaviour has not changed.
In essence last time I got him on the call I asked what was going on and if (a) his feelings have changed and (b) he wants relationship to continue, and he answers "I don't know" to both. Then he says he needed time to sort out some stuff and hangs up. To make matters worse I asked him these questions while we were both in the same town (we both come from the same home town and happened to be there at the same time). I wanted to meet him in person but he wasn't setting a date with me. However he knew I was coming and knew I was there.
We never met up after that call. I've heard nothing from him since but nor have I contacted him due to his request for time. It's now been a month. My friends are saying to take his silence and the fact that he didn't catch up with me while I was in town as closure and to move on but I'm finding it very difficult to do so, especially when the change seemed to happen overnight.
So I'm told the reasons why this happens is that (a) he met someone else (b) the relationship got serious and he realises he's just not that into me or (c) something happened at work / life that caused him to cut me off (unrelated to me). He's not used to expressing his feelings and but is a good guy.
While I'm hurt and confused, deep down I'm still hoping the reason is (c) and that he was just (and still is) overwhelmed. For those more experienced than I, and based on what I've written, I am wondering if there's still any value in contacting him to ask for an explanation or at least try to clear the air. There is a loving from a distance blog post that suggests there may be some value in doing so (titled "He says he lost the feelings he had for me").
Any advice appreciated, thanks.
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