Longest Long Distance Relationship?

[whatruckus]

It can definitely work. We have a lot of success stories on here. But, it can only work if both parties are invested. Just like any other relationship. It takes two to tango, unless you're weird like me and don't know how dance.

[Rezie]

I have indeed, it's been a topic we've visited a fair bit. He's basically said that after we've met a few times, and we know for sure we want to pursue something long term, he is willing to go through any avenues to be with me. He knows what he'll be leaving behind, but he seems quite optimistic about it; his reasoning is that there is no price on love, and even if it may be difficult now, it'll be worth it in the end. Which is basically the best response I could get, right? But as I said, he's a big romantic and I worry that it clouds some of the realism sometimes. Which is why I try to be the logical one, but I think sometimes it comes across as negative.

Almost like reading my own text. Sometimes being practical comes off being negative, but if it is in your nature you can't "go with the flow" just becuase someone else tells you to. I personally sometimes wonder if my way of thinking is because of the way I am or if deep down I have a feeling that something is off.

Unfortunately these are the things that you have to figure out yourself. In what schedule is your partner thinking of moving there? Maybe if he knows your stand and he is still willing to come over and you are willing to give it a chance you might feel different when you get to meet up gain. Also it is possible that your partner really knows what he is doing or alternatively when the situation of meeting up comes closer the reality might hit him.

As for some of the comments on this forum. This is an internet forum and people in internet forums sometimes like to anonymously judge people, missunderstand on purpose or just cause mayhem for fun. Gladly majority of people in here are nice normal and helpful people

[ThePhoenixRises]

For what it's worth, I didn't interpret your post as you trying to compete I have been a member at this forum since December 2015 - so I am still quite new myself - but I am finding that overall that most of the people on this forum are very helpful and supportive. LDRs do come in all shapes and sizes and they can all be hard in their own ways. I myself am in an Australia/Europe LDR - so I can understand the challenges and the difficulties - and as Moon said - international LDRs do come with their own set of challenges. But it absolutely can be done if both parties are willing to communicate and work together to see a successful outcome - if that is what both people want.

I think for me, the hardest part is planning the trips because with the fact that it takes nearly a full day to just get to his country, a lot of planning and preparation has to go into it, because we can't just visit for a weekend, so there is also the factor of time off work, etc. But keep positive, it can be done and there are a lot of success stories on this forum worth a read

[gamer_gurl]

I have indeed, it's been a topic we've visited a fair bit. He's basically said that after we've met a few times, and we know for sure we want to pursue something long term, he is willing to go through any avenues to be with me. He knows what he'll be leaving behind, but he seems quite optimistic about it; his reasoning is that there is no price on love, and even if it may be difficult now, it'll be worth it in the end. Which is basically the best response I could get, right? But as I said, he's a big romantic and I worry that it clouds some of the realism sometimes. Which is why I try to be the logical one, but I think sometimes it comes across as negative.

He sounds lovely and extremely rational. From what you say, he would not want to move prematurely too, as in - he would first like to meet you a few times, and only if it transpires to be a relationship worth fighting for, he would be prepared to fight. Romantic and rational, awesome. How long have you been in an LDR with him? From what you're saying about prices and stuff, it seems it will take at least a couple of years for you both to decide whether he should move countries. I would say not to worry prematurely about it now, just enjoy what you both have and decide for yourself whether you're prepared to invest the time the relationship needs to reach that 'international move' decision stage. You're quite young so you still have time (I wouldn't probably go for it being 34 I am now). All in all, enjoy love :-) some people never get to experience it. Hope it works out :-)

[Framboise]

I live like 12 000km away from my boyfriend. And I absolutely understand what you mean when you say that this sounds impossible. I sometimes feel the same way. When I see people who are like 800-900km from their loves I'm like, okay it will be SO GREAT to be in this situation instead of having the whole world to cross when we want to meet. Anyway. I know it's maybe kind of selfish but I disagree with the fact that "all distances are the same". It's not true. But your love is not impossible either. You can make it work. Of course it is difficult and tough but it will be okay.

[Honour]

I disagree with the fact that "all distances are the same". It's not true. But your love is not impossible either. You can make it work. Of course it is difficult and tough but it will be okay.

Yeah, I partially agree with you here... in your mind, 80 miles compared to 8,000 sounds extremely daunting and might even put some people off. Perceptions vs. realities of things though... they can totally differ.

[Framboise]

No. I understand that a relationship from 80 miles away between two teenagers who doesn't earn lots of money can be as tough as another relationship between two people from 8000 miles away from each other. But in MY situation, with MY life, and my money, if my boyfriend was clike 80 miles away, it will be obviously so much easier.

[snow]

No. I understand that a relationship from 80 miles away between two teenagers who doesn't earn lots of money can be as tough as another relationship between two people from 8000 miles away from each other. But in MY situation, with MY life, and my money, if my boyfriend was clike 80 miles away, it will be obviously so much easier.

And that is why we don't compare distances

[maybesomeday]

Almost like reading my own text. Sometimes being practical comes off being negative, but if it is in your nature you can't "go with the flow" just becuase someone else tells you to. I personally sometimes wonder if my way of thinking is because of the way I am or if deep down I have a feeling that something is off.

Unfortunately these are the things that you have to figure out yourself. In what schedule is your partner thinking of moving there? Maybe if he knows your stand and he is still willing to come over and you are willing to give it a chance you might feel different when you get to meet up gain. Also it is possible that your partner really knows what he is doing or alternatively when the situation of meeting up comes closer the reality might hit him.

As for some of the comments on this forum. This is an internet forum and people in internet forums sometimes like to anonymously judge people, missunderstand on purpose or just cause mayhem for fun. Gladly majority of people in here are nice normal and helpful people

Exactly, you get it.

He's thinking within a two-three year bracket, so it gives us enough time to visit each other and really figure out if and how we want to pursue this. But he is confident he will want to move here with me.

Most are nice, yes. Thank you!

[maybesomeday]

For what it's worth, I didn't interpret your post as you trying to compete I have been a member at this forum since December 2015 - so I am still quite new myself - but I am finding that overall that most of the people on this forum are very helpful and supportive. LDRs do come in all shapes and sizes and they can all be hard in their own ways. I myself am in an Australia/Europe LDR - so I can understand the challenges and the difficulties - and as Moon said - international LDRs do come with their own set of challenges. But it absolutely can be done if both parties are willing to communicate and work together to see a successful outcome - if that is what both people want.

I think for me, the hardest part is planning the trips because with the fact that it takes nearly a full day to just get to his country, a lot of planning and preparation has to go into it, because we can't just visit for a weekend, so there is also the factor of time off work, etc. But keep positive, it can be done and there are a lot of success stories on this forum worth a read

Thank you.

Indeed; we haven't started planning for a trip to happen any time soon, but we have done research on what things will cost, or within a certain range, and when and how we can manage to do it. Even that can get a little hectic, so I can only imagine it'll become a little more daunting once the time comes to really put everything into place.

Thanks for the encouragement!

[maybesomeday]

He sounds lovely and extremely rational. From what you say, he would not want to move prematurely too, as in - he would first like to meet you a few times, and only if it transpires to be a relationship worth fighting for, he would be prepared to fight. Romantic and rational, awesome. How long have you been in an LDR with him? From what you're saying about prices and stuff, it seems it will take at least a couple of years for you both to decide whether he should move countries. I would say not to worry prematurely about it now, just enjoy what you both have and decide for yourself whether you're prepared to invest the time the relationship needs to reach that 'international move' decision stage. You're quite young so you still have time (I wouldn't probably go for it being 34 I am now). All in all, enjoy love :-) some people never get to experience it. Hope it works out :-)

He is pretty lovely. Rational too, I suppose, but maybe in a little over his head sometimes because of how romantic he can be. Overall that's not a bad thing, of course. To be honest, we kind of just fell into this relationship with time, one day we just realised we were more than friends. I met him over a year ago, we've been "more than friends" for about 7-8 months. And that is good advice, thank you. Going with the flow, in a sense, is probably a good way to go about it until we know for sure that we can pursue something long-term and permanent.

[sasad]

No. I understand that a relationship from 80 miles away between two teenagers who doesn't earn lots of money can be as tough as another relationship between two people from 8000 miles away from each other. But in MY situation, with MY life, and my money, if my boyfriend was clike 80 miles away, it will be obviously so much easier.

Not really... Factor in children and 80 or 8000 doesn't make a lick of difference.. Especially if the other parent is involved and you can't move until kids are 8. 8 years.

[R&R]

Not really... Factor in children and 80 or 8000 doesn't make a lick of difference.. Especially if the other parent is involved and you can't move until kids are 8. 8 years.

But she is saying for her situation, that if they were only 80 miles apart, it would make her individual situation much easier. I can understand that. I mean, I drive over 100 miles on a Saturday just to go up North with the kids for the day. If my SO was 80 miles away, for me, that wouldn't even be an LDR because I could see him as frequently as I liked. 80 miles, depending on the couples situation, can be considered LDR or CD.

[sasad]

But she is saying for her situation, that if they were only 80 miles apart, it would make her individual situation much easier. I can understand that. I mean, I drive over 100 miles on a Saturday just to go up North with the kids for the day. If my SO was 80 miles away, for me, that wouldn't even be an LDR because I could see him as frequently as I liked. 80 miles, depending on the couples situation, can be considered LDR or CD.

I was making a comment on the first part. More direct to OP .

[R&R]

I was making a comment on the first part. More direct to OP .

Ahhhh, gotcha.