Scared To Travel To My SO.

[maybesomeday]

I’ll try to make this as short as I can.

It’s been a week since my SO left after visiting me for just under two weeks. It was our first meeting, and it went better than I expected. So naturally, it is my turn to visit him and his country + family.

He’s in England and I’m in Australia, so it’s typically a 22-24 hour flight. Very long, and very draining. The usual stop-over is in Dubai for almost 2 hours, and my SO was delayed by a whole day on his way to me. It was completely unexpected, and meant we’d have a day less with each other, not to mention he had to stay in an unfamiliar country on his own for 24 hours.

We both suffer with anxiety, so travelling is a lot more daunting and stressful than it would be for the average Joe. I’m sure everyone would feel anxious, but it’s a lot different when anxiety often rules your life. However, he did seem to deal with the delay very well, maybe because he’s had travel experience before and he usually has a positive mindset about things. I’m a lot different, though.

There is no way for me to travel direct. The Dubai stop-over isn’t my only option, but it is the option that costs less and provides me with a “quicker” flight time. Travelling on my own, so far away, with three different airports along the way, is already causing me to panic. But it’s the thought that I would be delayed that really makes me worry, and quite frankly scared shitless! My SO was also delayed by an hour in Dubai on his way back home. I have also read reviews that often times most flights are delayed in Dubai. So, there’s a high chance I would be too, and that’s going to be a big issue for me. I think I would be okay if the flight was delayed by a few hours, as I could remain in the airport where it’s safe. However, if it was delayed by several hours to a day, then that’s where things are going to get a little scary for me.

I’d be a young girl on my own, I’d be easy prey…It’s not a nice thought, anyway.

I panic and stress easily, and I feel a delay in my flights will be my breaking point. So this brings me to the title of this post…I’m scared to travel to my SO. So scared, that I find myself trying to talk myself out of visiting him.

Does anyone have any advice on how I can overcome this? Or any tips on how I can keep safe and keep a level-head when I travel?

P.S. I’m not asking for advice on my anxiety; I’ve dealt with it most my life and there are techniques I know to do to help calm me, but they are never always guaranteed.

Thank you.

[autumn1790]

I flew into and out of Dubai on Emirates...stayed there for a day and toured the major landmarks. I was with my sister and her husband, but I felt pretty safe the whole time. All the terminals we went to (I think 2 & 3) were super modern and classy. My sister had booked a hotel ahead of time and we just took shuttles to and from the airport--very simple, easy to follow all the English signs. There were plenty of single females in the terminals I saw, so you would not stand out from the crowd. And there's so many information desks and people stamding around in information vests to help you out to wherever you need to go. I would suggest trying to have at least 6-8 hours between your flights, so you have time to figure out where you need to go and how to get there. We had to go through a smaller version of security again (just bag checking and metal detector) directly after getting off the plane from India, so that took awhile, but I don't know if you would have to.
The one thing that made me nervous was immigration...if you leave the airport, you have to go through immigration. We stood in line for over an hour, and the whole time we were stared at. I don't mean the look and look away stare, I mean the oh they're staring, look back five minutes later and they're still staring. Ten minutes they're still staring. Not sure if that would happen to you, but it's just a culture difference I'm guessing.
I loved the time in Dubai, so I hope you will have a good time, too. Just try to remember it's bringing you closer to your love. Good luck!

[differentcountries]

Hi, usually what happens when a plan gets delayed for several hours is that they give you a hotel room and breakfast for free. This is usually in an airport hotel with close proximity to the airport, where you take the airport shuttle bus and everything is very "airport". At least for me, it still felt as if I was in the airport. Some airport hotels are also actually placed IN the airport.

I dont have anxiety, but when I travel I usually for for a worst case scenario preperations. It is normal for a plane to be late, therefore in itself there is nothing worrying about a plane being late. I usually calculate that every plane is late by at least 2 hours. I plan my intake of food and water accordingly (I eat a lot in airports. If choosing foreign food worries you, try to find a Burger King or some other international chain).

The first time I visited SO, I researched hotels close to the airport/in the nearby city, so that if he did not pick me up, I would know places to go.

I have flown stretches my hometown -capital- international airport or/and Istanbul- his work or home town. I have had trips that lasted more than 24 hours and included hotels. It can be quite draining, but the most important thing is to carry money and credit cards and some food with you. Whatever bad should happen, those things may help you.

Also remember that the airline people as well as grounding staff are there to help you. And if a plane is delayed/grounded you will also probably travel in a group with the other passengers, so you can turn to other people for practical help. You can also be in touch with friends and family for reassurance and practical tips.

[maybesomeday]

I flew into and out of Dubai on Emirates...stayed there for a day and toured the major landmarks. I was with my sister and her husband, but I felt pretty safe the whole time. All the terminals we went to (I think 2 & 3) were super modern and classy. My sister had booked a hotel ahead of time and we just took shuttles to and from the airport--very simple, easy to follow all the English signs. There were plenty of single females in the terminals I saw, so you would not stand out from the crowd. And there's so many information desks and people stamding around in information vests to help you out to wherever you need to go. I would suggest trying to have at least 6-8 hours between your flights, so you have time to figure out where you need to go and how to get there. We had to go through a smaller version of security again (just bag checking and metal detector) directly after getting off the plane from India, so that took awhile, but I don't know if you would have to.
The one thing that made me nervous was immigration...if you leave the airport, you have to go through immigration. We stood in line for over an hour, and the whole time we were stared at. I don't mean the look and look away stare, I mean the oh they're staring, look back five minutes later and they're still staring. Ten minutes they're still staring. Not sure if that would happen to you, but it's just a culture difference I'm guessing.
I loved the time in Dubai, so I hope you will have a good time, too. Just try to remember it's bringing you closer to your love. Good luck!

Thank you for the advice. I've been trying to find the cheapest flights with only one stop over, and the stop over I found was in Dubai for 1 hour and 55 minutes, if not delayed. In a way that's better for me as I don't have to stay too long in a place I'll be stressed and uncomfortable in, but then on the other hand I worry I'll need more time as you said (6-8 hours) to really figure out everything.

Hi, usually what happens when a plan gets delayed for several hours is that they give you a hotel room and breakfast for free. This is usually in an airport hotel with close proximity to the airport, where you take the airport shuttle bus and everything is very "airport". At least for me, it still felt as if I was in the airport. Some airport hotels are also actually placed IN the airport.

I dont have anxiety, but when I travel I usually for for a worst case scenario preperations. It is normal for a plane to be late, therefore in itself there is nothing worrying about a plane being late. I usually calculate that every plane is late by at least 2 hours. I plan my intake of food and water accordingly (I eat a lot in airports. If choosing foreign food worries you, try to find a Burger King or some other international chain).

The first time I visited SO, I researched hotels close to the airport/in the nearby city, so that if he did not pick me up, I would know places to go.

I have flown stretches my hometown -capital- international airport or/and Istanbul- his work or home town. I have had trips that lasted more than 24 hours and included hotels. It can be quite draining, but the most important thing is to carry money and credit cards and some food with you. Whatever bad should happen, those things may help you.

Also remember that the airline people as well as grounding staff are there to help you. And if a plane is delayed/grounded you will also probably travel in a group with the other passengers, so you can turn to other people for practical help. You can also be in touch with friends and family for reassurance and practical tips.

Thanks for the tips. My SO was given a free room at a hotel about 15 minutes by taxi from the airport, and two food vouchers so he could eat there. Which was fine, but my point is that I don't want to leave the airport at all, so I don't want my flight to be delayed.

I'll try to keep all the essentials in my carry on bag, in case anything wrong does happen.

Hopefully so. It'd be much better if help was easily accessible. Thanks.

[autumn1790]

I read online that a 2 hour layover in Dubai is fine. If you haven't done so already, I would check when the next flight onward from Dubai to your destination is in case your flight into Dubai gets delayed and you need to be put on the next one. That way you'll know what Plan B is, and it might help you stay calmer.

[Sparkling72]

Dubai really isn't too bad. the US has a strong military presence there. I would be more worried about my foul mouth in public b/c they can arrest for that LOL If your lay over is 8 hrs... I'd still camp out in the airport. If you're delayed even longer, I am willing to bet you're not the only one and you could probably befriend another lady who is headed to the same hotel.

[maybesomeday]

I read online that a 2 hour layover in Dubai is fine. If you haven't done so already, I would check when the next flight onward from Dubai to your destination is in case your flight into Dubai gets delayed and you need to be put on the next one. That way you'll know what Plan B is, and it might help you stay calmer.

I think the flight there will be fine, as if there is a delay I can always catch the next available flight. However on the way back from Dubai to my city, there's only one flight per day, which is why the delay would be an issue for me. But I'll definitely check it all out anyway and hope there's nothing to panic about. (: Thanks.

[BritishGirl]

Honestly, it is not as scary as you think! In May 2015 I flew from England to the US on my own for the first time. There's no direct flight to his state from England so I had to stop over in another airport to catch a connecting flight. I had never travelled on my own before and I had never had to catch a connecting flight before. Typically everything is easily sign posted, I managed to find a train to get me to the new terminal I needed and if I needed help I asked someone (which is hard for me as I am a very anxious/nervous/shy person!). I've done it 3 times on my own now and it gets so much easier. The first time I had a 5 hour layover in Chicago airport, which for me kept me calm as I knew I was there in plenty of time for my flight in case of delays. But the last 2 times I've had only 1.5-2.5 hour layovers and they were honestly just as easy. If you book all your flights in one go you will be covered should the worst happen and they'll put you on the next available flight, but try not to worry about that so much as it may be unnecessary worrying, as that's exactly how I felt! I took a handheld games console plus my macbook with a ton of films on to keep me occupied on the flight and during waiting times in the airport. I'm sure you'll be absolutely fine and have a great journey!

[Kimikins]

They are starting direct flights Oz to london I believe

[maybesomeday]

Honestly, it is not as scary as you think! In May 2015 I flew from England to the US on my own for the first time. There's no direct flight to his state from England so I had to stop over in another airport to catch a connecting flight. I had never travelled on my own before and I had never had to catch a connecting flight before. Typically everything is easily sign posted, I managed to find a train to get me to the new terminal I needed and if I needed help I asked someone (which is hard for me as I am a very anxious/nervous/shy person!). I've done it 3 times on my own now and it gets so much easier. The first time I had a 5 hour layover in Chicago airport, which for me kept me calm as I knew I was there in plenty of time for my flight in case of delays. But the last 2 times I've had only 1.5-2.5 hour layovers and they were honestly just as easy. If you book all your flights in one go you will be covered should the worst happen and they'll put you on the next available flight, but try not to worry about that so much as it may be unnecessary worrying, as that's exactly how I felt! I took a handheld games console plus my macbook with a ton of films on to keep me occupied on the flight and during waiting times in the airport. I'm sure you'll be absolutely fine and have a great journey!

Thank you. There's only one flight per day from Dubai to my city, so if it gets delayed I will have no choice but to wait a whole 24 hours for the next flight. That's my main concern. However, by what you've said, being at the airports seems much simpler than I've thought. As long as there are obvious signs and help available, I should be okay. Thanks!

[maybesomeday]

They are starting direct flights Oz to london I believe

Yes, but it doesn't start up until March 2018. It'll be a direct flight from Perth to London. But I don't want to have to wait until then to see my SO.