Things went all wrong! - Breakup help

[Xandal]

First, refer to me as Zack. The forum name is just an alias I use for everything.

Anyway, here's the situation. I'm older than her, I'll be 19 in just a few days and she's still a Junior in high school. I'm attending my first year of College and well... The first week of it was terrible. It was an orientation week that was incredibly busy and I spent almost all of my time busy, my text messages sent to her were really lack-luster, and there was little to no time at all to talk with her. That's not the worst of it, once that passed it only got worse and I made a huge mistake and broke up with her because I thought that was the best option for both of us. Now, after a week or two, I've finally figured out everything that I got tossed in to and why we were fighting (this includes fights before College too). It was me, I was a jerk and now I know it. I've apologized to her for it because that's all I could do. I finally realized how much I really loved her and how amazing she was. So... I asked for her back. Not in a simple manner what-so-ever... I just tried to get her back. She won't budge and I'm going crazy. I can't eat, I can't sleep, I can't even organize a forum post because I'm so incredibly upset. What can I do to get her back? Can I even get her back? She keeps saying things like she doesn't love me and when I sent her a good morning she told me she had someone else to tell her good morning now and that that person is more important. She acts like she never had feelings for me, but I believe it's a facade. We're nearing 2 years, I know she loves me... Somewhere in that mess...

Edit: I apologize for the text block and frantic formatting of the message... I'm just a mess right now.

[annamorgan]

I'm am also a junior in highschool, so being the same age as her, I can understand a lot about her. She's a teenager and her emotions will be so up and down you will never know what to say right. She's probably hurt that you broke up with her, and because you didn't think it through thoroughly, she might think you don't care. She may or may not actually have another guy in her life like she claims, she may be saying this to make you feel bad (don't assume this though, I'm just saying it could be an option). I think you should text her asking if she can have a short phone conversation with you, and if she agrees, explain to her how you feel like you've done here. Don't beg or plead, just tell her everything. Then take it from there.

[LadyMarchHare]

Well, first off at least you realized you screwed up. However, that and saying sorry, no matter how you said it, does not guarantee you'll get the one you let go back. More than likely she's still hurt over the breakup but if she's saying she has someone else, well, she has someone else. It's not uncommon for someone her age to easily flit to another relationship no matter how much they invested in someone emotionally. Chances are you two weren't on the same page of 'love' anyway.

Sorry, but I think you need to let her go. There's no use in hanging on to someone who won't return to you and killing yourself inside, thinking the more you beg, plead, and crawl on your belly they'll return. If they do, chances are it's out of pity and not love, and you don't deserve that. I wish you the best.

[Zephii]

Welcome to the forum Zack
To me it sounds like you need to find a good way to explain everything that she can't interrupt you or hang up, if you have not already. Texts are not your friend when trying to fix this. I'd suggest a nice handwritten letter. Tell her everything, try not to ramble. Just explain that you've had time to think and figure it all out, you can see where things were going wrong before, etc. You might ask to at least remain friends so you're still in her life. If she has another SO, you could try to wait that out, if you think that's what is best.

She's hurt, and it's going to take her a while to get past that - if she ever does. Additionally she probably has friends and family supporting her to not get back together with you so you don't treat her badly again. All you can do is show her you wont treat her like that again, and that'll take time. Try not to come off as the crazy stalker type while you're there, because desperate isn't hot.

I'm sure with preserverance, if you're supposed to be together, you will be.

[paulawriteslove]

I am so sorry for your situation. She sounds like a very emotional person and needs time to gather her feelings. I don't think you should give up yet, but give it time. If she doesn't come around in a few weeks, then maybe you should give it up. But not yet!! Best of luck!!

[Karringtyn]

2 years is a long long time. I wouldn't hang up the hat yet. You have been given many great ideas here as to how to approach it. Have you asked if you could talk on the phone? i would start there...and then the handwritten letter is a good idea.

If it is love...it will work itself out. Believe.