First meeting, so confused.

[Lio]

Welcome back.

It seems that this guy is trying to get girls' attention to him. Like an attention whore, you know, but male version. And more than attention, he was trying to have at least two girls for himself. And then, what would have it been ? Three, four ? Would he be kinda polygamous ? Or maybe he would feel what he "felt" for you, for this girl, and then he'll meet another one, and bis repetita .. as you say, he's almost 33, but from what your post, he's acting like a teenager.. and even teenagers (not all, sadly) behave better than him.

The thing which is probably the most shocking is when he described their sex to you. This is completely cruel. This is like, flirting with you (and with her at the same time, while you not knowing about it), then throwing you away, just like that. This is a disgusting behaviour.

I'm glad that you're moving on. You deserve way better. I supposed you blocked him everywhere now ? (deleting is not enough in some cases)

There is a sentence that I like, that I found on the Twitter account of some politic, who sometimes uses it to people who mock him : "you don't know the feeling of shame, as you have no honour". That could suit him.

Good luck. I believe you're now on the right way to feel better. And yes, this is right. The only person we should trust is ourselves, and we tend to forget that. Instead, we decide to trust this or that person. Sometimes it works, and some other times it doesn't.

[Rey]

Welcome back.

It seems that this guy is trying to get girls' attention to him. Like an attention whore, you know, but male version. And more than attention, he was trying to have at least two girls for himself. And then, what would have it been ? Three, four ? Would he be kinda polygamous ? Or maybe he would feel what he "felt" for you, for this girl, and then he'll meet another one, and bis repetita .. as you say, he's almost 33, but from what your post, he's acting like a teenager.. and even teenagers (not all, sadly) behave better than him.

The thing which is probably the most shocking is when he described their sex to you. This is completely cruel. This is like, flirting with you (and with her at the same time, while you not knowing about it), then throwing you away, just like that. This is a disgusting behaviour.

I'm glad that you're moving on. You deserve way better. I supposed you blocked him everywhere now ? (deleting is not enough in some cases)

There is a sentence that I like, that I found on the Twitter account of some politic, who sometimes uses it to people who mock him : "you don't know the feeling of shame, as you have no honour". That could suit him.

Good luck. I believe you're now on the right way to feel better. And yes, this is right. The only person we should trust is ourselves, and we tend to forget that. Instead, we decide to trust this or that person. Sometimes it works, and some other times it doesn't.

Thank you so much for the loving and supportive reply, it honestly healed part of me. I needed to really see the real him cause I put him on a pedestal for so long thinking he’s this awesome good man and it made it harder to move on cause my mind kept going back to that idea, that he’s a good person so it must be me that’s wrong and he had reasons to reject me! Seeing him through others has helped me let go of this idolizm.

You’re also dead right about the attention part, I think because he used to be much less attractive and struggled with his weight and getting desired by women have made him that way, now he’s good looking and he has a better more outgoing life and he’s enjoying attention he’s never had before, it’s what really surprised me when we met face to face that he came off much more insecure than I imagined.

And yep, he was talking to her and me at the same time... if he’s sharing her sex life with me, an ex he knows it’d break my heart and he has no honor talking about her that way either. Now it only makes me wonder how much he’s shared about me with others.

At least now I can move on knowing I didn’t lose a good man.

[Lio]

When we're in love, we see our loved one as a very good person. Some people show that this impression is the right one, and then there are the others, like him, who disappoint, for this or that reason.

Somehow I relate to him a little bit, about the weight. I'm overweight for years, and worked out in order to lose some kg - until I got a kind of stupid injury - and I also wasn't considered as attractive by girls, especially in my area. It was a bit different online. But, does getting attention allow us to behave the way he does ? No. It may be nice to get attention, but people still should behave properly. Being attractive is not an excuse to behave like this. Also, physical attraction is not everything.

I suppose that if he behaved that way with you, he probably will do the same with her, after some time. Now that you know you didn't lose a good man, it's about time to forget him - not the experience, because it could be useful to remember it, if anything similar was going to happen - which I don't wish to you. No-one deserves to be treated the way he did to you.