Not coping so well.

[Kerry92]

Hello
Thank you for taking the time to read my post I shall try not to ramble on too much.

In November I spent a two week holiday in the states visiting my boyfriend. It was amazing we had so much fun and just being physically near him made me the happiest I have been in years. (Anyways I won't bore you guys with the rest) When it was time for me to come home i cried like crazy at the airport and on the plane. I missed him so much and when I was home I cried a little more but as the days went on I began to get back into my normal routine of work and family coping a little more each day but still missing him like crazy.

I thought I was coping well but recently it has gotten worse and I dont know what to do about it. I worry all the time that I am falling out of love with him when he has done nothing to give me that idea infact he has done nothing but prove to me that he loves me and wants to be with me and I know that I love him and want to be with him too. I know the distance is my biggest problem and I wish with all my heart that we could close it soon as it kills me to think of how far away he is. I dont want my own stupidity and over reactions to ruin my relationship with him as I love him very much.

I apologize if this just sounds like some inane rambling but I just had to get this off my chest. I love my boyfriend so very much and I want us to be together. If anyone has been through this or is going through something similar I would love to hear from you. Any advice from people who have beaten the distance and overcame hard trials would be greatly appriciated.

Again sorry the rambling.

[autumn1790]

You're not alone...this is a common thread theme. Maybe reading through them and seeing how other people have dealt with it would help you a bit. I know for me, sometimes I just have to tell him the distance is hitting me hard, and hear his words of reassurance. Since he isn't here this holiday period, and can barely talk to me with his family around, I've picked up at work a lot and try to focus on that. Maybe the people would have better ideas.
But yeah, it happens to most people in one way or another, and it sucks. Hang in there!

[Kerry92]

Thank you so very much for your kind words and for taking the time to read my rambling. Sometimes I do forget that I am not alone in this kind of thing as it is hard. I shall give the other threads a read over and see what help they can give me. Thank you again :-)

[Tenebrae]

I think it's perfectly common. Our whole biology (as well as psyche) screams at us to be close to the person we're in love with. In my case it leads to intense frustration and anxiety when my girlfriend and I are apart. But keep in mind that "distance" is what defines "long distance relationship," so in that sense what you're feeling is normal. It's the obstacle that we all have in common here.

The thing that I've found most helpful is to spend time planning the next visit, even if it's weeks away, and even if you don't know exactly when it will be. I know my girlfriend and I will be together at least once in February or March, and the wait is killing me, but by planning the things we'll do together, I manage to anticipate rather than dwell on our current distance. maybe that would work for you? I hope so. Best of luck and best wishes.

[Kerry92]

Thank you for the advice. Planning our next visit is helping a little bit so heres hoping thanks for the well wishes