I think right now you just need to walk away from the computer and try to relax and clear your head. Basically either way you're giving the reaction he wants. I'm not even entertaining the 'if' of him hurting himself because really I don't think that's what he's doing, but I know the possibility's real for you and it's scary because you care about him and no one wants to have a loved one do anything like that, especially over such a reason as a possible break up. Just look after yourself right now, try to calm down and don't let your brain go down that path.
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guys i'm so scared. he attempted suicide once before and he's bipolar so what if he's in one of those depression phases? he doesnnt take meds for it. what if hurts himself what if he dies it'll be all my fault.Comment
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Try to stop doing the "what ifs." I know this is scary and hard, but this isn't worth making yourself crazy. When you wake up tomorrow morning, and everything's ok, all this worrying will have been for nothing. Take some deep breaths and do something to distract you. Maybe you have some friends who can come over and be with you??Comment
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I'm bipolar, medicated, and still become suicidal. Guess what stops me and lots of others? Cowardice. Everyone fears death, the pain, etc. If he's honestly in a manic depression that's on him because those fuckers start themselves, outside influence doesn't do diddly.
And you're wrong, if he dies, it's HIS fault. He makes his own choices, the only way it would be your fault is if you told him outright to kill himself, which you did not.Comment
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no i'm sorry. and my friends usually stay up till 3 am but of course this is the one day they go to bed earlyComment
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Well you have us, so you aren't completely alone.Comment
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I wish you could remove yourself from this situation and see what we see. I think you're reacting exactly how he wants you to. I don't think he has any intention of hurting himself at all.Comment
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i know i mean i sort of experienced this before but i just have a feeling and right now i feel so helpless. he told me about how he nearly died befre but someone found him and took him to the hospital.Comment
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Whether he's "faking" this or not, he shouldn't be putting you through this. When you love someone, you don't intentionally hurt them, and by not talking to you, that's exactly what he's doing. Break up or not, this isn't right.Comment
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Just because they try once doesn't mean they will again and, for all you know, that story's a load of bull. Like I said you need to think about you right now, not him. If, and I mean a big if, he does hurt himself, the blame goes entirely to him because he told the one person who couldn't do a damn thing besides sit back and cry. No matter how messed up you are, you CHOOSE to hurt yourself or remove yourself from this world. Yeah there are circumstances for it like everything else but it's still a choice, just like one chooses to get help.
Meant to ask this earlier, you said he's bipolar but isn't on medication. Who diagnosed him, then? Any psychiatrist would've put him on Depakote or Lithium right away.Comment
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i don't know. i didn't know him when he was first diagnosed. i'm nervous to talk to him about his bipolar disorder because i don't want to say the wrong thing. he might have meds but he doesn't take them. he doesn't really believe in doctors eitherComment
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There's really nothing 'wrong' to say in regards to curiousity about it beyond "so how crazy does this make you?" Bipolar's the new depression in terms of being common. As for his meds, if he does have them and chooses not to take them, then he's choosing to be unstable and unhappy. I don't like taking pills either but I'd rather swallow the 7 pills I gotta take twice a day in order to be somewhat happy and not be a ball of crazy than stand by some asinine belief that doctors are bad and I'm fine and pull crap like this on people I love and feel ashamed when the manic low goes away.Comment
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I agree with lisa here. I think it is just another way for him to control you. After this he will probably hold this one over your head. I know you are worried but it is just something to think about. I would be worried too.Originally posted by lisaar910 View Post
So anyways what I am taking from what has happened so far when you told him he either had to forgive you or break up... Instead of just forgiving you he would rather "take his own life" or hurt himself (or scare you to believe he is thinking about doing that)???? Really? Why couldn't he just forgive you? Forgiveness is easier than hurting or killing yourself. That's why I don't think he is actually going to do anything to himself because of how ridiculous that would be. I think he is only trying to punish you for threatening to leave him by making you scared enough that you would go crawling back to him so you don't lose him.Comment
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i don't know what to do when this is over. if he really is faking which i'm not so sure of. i mean i DEFINITELY don't want to be with him after this but i don't want anoth suicide scareComment
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Were you guys on an instant messenger or the phone when this happened? You said he quit talking so I guess he's still showing as online or had he signed off? Because really at this point I'd be IMing him saying "you done yet?"
Either way I count this relationship as over, because that's a dick move.Comment
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