LDR wife wants divorce, but I've planned a surprise visit. What do I do?
At the start of the year I planned a surprise visit for my SO, set for June 10th. Her mom was in on it and I was going to make her a surprise meal for when she got home.
However, since I moved house a couple of weeks ago, she has become increasingly hostile and I haven't managed to get any kind of meaningful conversation out of her; instead she insists on talking about my past mistakes, constantly criticises me and shifts blame. This was 24/7, I got sick pretty quick so I asked for space a lot, and I didn't receive it; constant calls and texts.
Last night, I completely lost it, and in a rage I hung up. She then text me these:
"I wasn't done talking
Hello
I said"
To which I text:
"I want time to think. You're never done talking, you give me no time to think. Leave me the f* alone."
She then continued:
"I don't love you like I used to
As in
When before I could look past your flaws and not care but after being repeatedly failed so many times it took a tole (toll, hole?) in my heart
It started to actually hurt
And I'm hurting because
Deep down I do wish we were our old selves
I tell you to do this and that because I want us to improve and u show me ur still there
and by doing things it shows me your actually wanting to keep me wanting to try and give me better
Because all I've been receiving are really bad and sad ways of showing ur "love"
And honestly it hurts
But I've realised
I shouldn't have ever bothered you to do anything
To nag you every day
Because if you really wanted to I would have
In your own time
But I'm not going to stand here like an idiot for a man who obviously doesn't see marriage the way I do
I'm not going to beg you anymore
Like I said the day I stop "nagging" u as u say then it's the day I'm done with us
I'm not wasting more of my life for someone I gotta beg to do anything they didn't want to do in the first place
I'm done
I'm setting you free
I'm not wasting your time anymore either
Let's get a divorce
For real this time
No more games
Let's both start to get better and move on
I'll go half on the lawyers fees
I'll make an appointment first business day
Clearly we weren't meant to be
I'm done crying for someone who doesn't take marriage as serious as I do
Maybe its in a different way then urs
But it's over
I don't need ur money anymore
Or u
U broke my heart
Idk if I can ever marry anyone anymore
Marriage doesn't mean the same to me like it used to."
I haven't called or text back since. What the hell do I do? I was supposed to be going over in two weeks to try and be more romantic and fix some issues she had with me. Obviously she has the impression we had no plans at all. Should I let the plans slip, go anyway or cancel it all? I'm devastated.
However, since I moved house a couple of weeks ago, she has become increasingly hostile and I haven't managed to get any kind of meaningful conversation out of her; instead she insists on talking about my past mistakes, constantly criticises me and shifts blame. This was 24/7, I got sick pretty quick so I asked for space a lot, and I didn't receive it; constant calls and texts.
Last night, I completely lost it, and in a rage I hung up. She then text me these:
"I wasn't done talking
Hello
I said"
To which I text:
"I want time to think. You're never done talking, you give me no time to think. Leave me the f* alone."
She then continued:
"I don't love you like I used to
As in
When before I could look past your flaws and not care but after being repeatedly failed so many times it took a tole (toll, hole?) in my heart
It started to actually hurt
And I'm hurting because
Deep down I do wish we were our old selves
I tell you to do this and that because I want us to improve and u show me ur still there
and by doing things it shows me your actually wanting to keep me wanting to try and give me better
Because all I've been receiving are really bad and sad ways of showing ur "love"
And honestly it hurts
But I've realised
I shouldn't have ever bothered you to do anything
To nag you every day
Because if you really wanted to I would have
In your own time
But I'm not going to stand here like an idiot for a man who obviously doesn't see marriage the way I do
I'm not going to beg you anymore
Like I said the day I stop "nagging" u as u say then it's the day I'm done with us
I'm not wasting more of my life for someone I gotta beg to do anything they didn't want to do in the first place
I'm done
I'm setting you free
I'm not wasting your time anymore either
Let's get a divorce
For real this time
No more games
Let's both start to get better and move on
I'll go half on the lawyers fees
I'll make an appointment first business day
Clearly we weren't meant to be
I'm done crying for someone who doesn't take marriage as serious as I do
Maybe its in a different way then urs
But it's over
I don't need ur money anymore
Or u
U broke my heart
Idk if I can ever marry anyone anymore
Marriage doesn't mean the same to me like it used to."
I haven't called or text back since. What the hell do I do? I was supposed to be going over in two weeks to try and be more romantic and fix some issues she had with me. Obviously she has the impression we had no plans at all. Should I let the plans slip, go anyway or cancel it all? I'm devastated.
Comment