So as some of you may know, I'm flying to Hong Kong to see my SO next week (8 days from today). Since he proposed this "real chat", it makes the whole visit feel really different. I know a lot of you feel nervous before your first visit (even you're CD before) but for me, it feels like if we can't figure out a relationship pattern that fits both of us, we'll have to go seperate ways.
From what I knew about him in the 7 months' time we spent together, he's not that kind of guy who'd cheat on me, then start to talk about how he's tempted/distracted and ask for my "permission" in a tricky way. He's quite simple-minded in all aspects of life except his professional life. I'll be very, very surprised if he turns out to be a manipulative person. And I still don't think he has cheated on me already.
However, I don't know what he's going to say when I go there. I think a lot of your analysis is right, he needs to grow up, or say accept the fact that he's 34 and the "youth" he wants to make up for has unfortunately gone. I believe he knows this, he just doesn't want to know he knows. I always find him an innocent and childish person at times although he's very mature when he works.
I guess I'm not going there to convince him to commit his future to me, I can't commit my future to him now! It has been only 7 months! But I think if we still want to have a relationship, we should commit to each other that we'll be loyal, honest, caring and sharing when we're still in a relationship and be willing to find out if we're having a future together.
We're still talking these days as usual, nothing between us has really changed since he left, well maybe we even talk more now. He has explored his new neighborhood so he can "show me around" when I go there and he's giving me "homework" to think about things we can do there. It just doesn't feel like some big storm is coming...but I know better. I guess I'm writing this down today not for opinions, but just as a record of what I'm thinking, and I can always look back after the "real chat".
From what I knew about him in the 7 months' time we spent together, he's not that kind of guy who'd cheat on me, then start to talk about how he's tempted/distracted and ask for my "permission" in a tricky way. He's quite simple-minded in all aspects of life except his professional life. I'll be very, very surprised if he turns out to be a manipulative person. And I still don't think he has cheated on me already.
However, I don't know what he's going to say when I go there. I think a lot of your analysis is right, he needs to grow up, or say accept the fact that he's 34 and the "youth" he wants to make up for has unfortunately gone. I believe he knows this, he just doesn't want to know he knows. I always find him an innocent and childish person at times although he's very mature when he works.
I guess I'm not going there to convince him to commit his future to me, I can't commit my future to him now! It has been only 7 months! But I think if we still want to have a relationship, we should commit to each other that we'll be loyal, honest, caring and sharing when we're still in a relationship and be willing to find out if we're having a future together.
We're still talking these days as usual, nothing between us has really changed since he left, well maybe we even talk more now. He has explored his new neighborhood so he can "show me around" when I go there and he's giving me "homework" to think about things we can do there. It just doesn't feel like some big storm is coming...but I know better. I guess I'm writing this down today not for opinions, but just as a record of what I'm thinking, and I can always look back after the "real chat".
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