Cry for help! I found loads of sex videos on my bf's pc including mine!!

[nicole]

I agree with everyone else, delete them and get out of there =/ I'm so sorry, but this relationship does not sound healthy. Do no let him try to explain, that is unacceptable and nothing he can say can change the facts. Go to a hotel until you can get on your flight.

Stay safe ok?

[nicole]

I agree with everyone else, delete them and get out of there =/ I'm so sorry, but this relationship does not sound healthy. Do no let him try to explain, that is unacceptable and nothing he can say can change the facts. Go to a hotel until you can get on your flight.

Stay safe ok?

[Élan]

Augh, I am so sorry this happened to you! I have to agree with everyone else: delete the videos and get out. I feel like finding out with 100% certainty that he not only cheated but also recorded you without permission is closure enough. I'd buy a calling card (to call family or friends), find a hotel and wait for your flight. I wouldn't even tell him anything about where you are going.

I won't comment on the cheating or the use of prostitutes on his trip... I still think this guy needs to go because of the video taping. It makes me sick to even think about someone doing that without my permission. I can't imagine how you felt finding the videos. Oh and in terms of if he's changed since you've been together, I highly doubt it. If I was him and I'd really changed for the better for my girlfriend, I'd immediately delete the videos of all the prostitutes and go "what was I thinking???!"

Do you have a phone with a prepaid SIM card over there? I'd change throw it away and get a new one so he can't contact you. You seem like a really sweet and giving person (for example, how you went to Hong Kong for your bf)... you deserve someone who won't cheat and who won't invade your privacy in this way. It's not that much to ask.

*biggest e-hugs since I don't know what else to say* Please be careful and get away from this guy.

[MissShortie]

I am so sorry you have to go through this but don't stay, if you stay with him it makes you look like a fool... and you aren't a fool. I'm sorry this is happening to you... be strong! <3

[Karringtyn]

Augh, I am so sorry this happened to you! I have to agree with everyone else: delete the videos and get out. I feel like finding out with 100% certainty that he not only cheated but also recorded you without permission is closure enough. I'd buy a calling card (to call family or friends), find a hotel and wait for your flight. I wouldn't even tell him anything about where you are going.

I won't comment on the cheating or the use of prostitutes on his trip... I still think this guy needs to go because of the video taping. It makes me sick to even think about someone doing that without my permission. I can't imagine how you felt finding the videos. Oh and in terms of if he's changed since you've been together, I highly doubt it. If I was him and I'd really changed for the better for my girlfriend, I'd immediately delete the videos of all the prostitutes and go "what was I thinking???!"

Do you have a phone with a prepaid SIM card over there? I'd change throw it away and get a new one so he can't contact you. You seem like a really sweet and giving person (for example, how you went to Hong Kong for your bf)... you deserve someone who won't cheat and who won't invade your privacy in this way. It's not that much to ask.

*biggest e-hugs since I don't know what else to say* Please be careful and get away from this guy.

Beautifully said.

You are such an amazing woman and you deserve MUCH MUCH more than this slime.

[elina]

Woah, that's horrible.. I'd die if I found out something like that.

Some kind of action has most likely already happened but I really hope you got yourself a copy of that video, got rid of them and got out of there! That guy's toxic and sooooooo doesn't deserve you.

Take care and be safe *hugs* can't even begin to imagine how horrible you must feel..

[Tanja]

What a pig. I'm pretty sure I posted in one of your threads before... Him wanting to look around for Asian girls was a red flag.

Leave him NOW, that's my advice. Leave and never look back, he's done something that can't be forgiven IMO plus it's illegal too. I suggest you show the tape to a police and have him held responsible for what he's done.

I'm sorry he's done this to you.. but on the other hand it's good that you found out about it now rather than after years of living together.

[Silviar]

He's given every indication that he's into casual encounters, and the tapes just seal it. Hun, if he taped this stuff with other women when he was supposed to be your honey, he cheated on you.

Leave. He doesn't deserve you. You'll be better off having someone who cherishes and respects you for the woman and partner you want to be.

[Silviar]

Oh, and might I add - I'd delete your sex act, too! Just in case...

[BluePikachu]

I'm so sorry you had to find out this way, instead of him just telling you about
I agree with many of the others, this is a giant red flag. You deserve sooo much more than him. I hate to say that, but he still seems like he needs to mature A LOT before he can get serious with you, especially over this amount of distance.
Personally, I wouldn't sit around and wait for him to come home to discuss this. Write him a long looooong letter, leave it with his computer, and book it.
Again, I'm so sorry you had to find out this way *hugs*

[Snowy.Winter]

I'm so sorry that this has happened to you. I don't have much advice for you, I just hope you'll be okay, and you have all of us here if you ever need to vent or talk.
*hugs*

[MoonWatcher]

I'm a little late on reading this. This is a really, REALLY tough situation. I'm so sorry you have to go through with it

We have lots of very wise people on this forum; listen to their advice. Reading from your other posts, I'd say your instincts were already telling you there was something wrong, but like most people we like to be proven wrong and that everything is still right and good so we try to bury those feelings as overreacting or nonsensical. They're there for a reason, though.

I've had personal experience with a boyfriend of mine taping our make-out sessions (one of them we had shirts off). I didn't have any idea about it until his roommate, who is a film major in college, came to me and said "You need to see this" a while after we'd broken up. Apparently he'd been using his friends equipment to film me without my knowledge. He'd even put a camera in the bathroom... where I had changed multiple times and even showered. Luckily I was the only one he'd filmed to our knowledge. I decided not to press charges though and just had his friend delete everything. He's the type that it would have probably scared him to the point of vomiting when he realized that we knew.

Also, I would like to stress the get-out-quick theme of advice. Placing my thoughts on prostitution aside, all these signs point to sex addict. And trust me, relationships with sex addicts DO NOT WORK and can become violent depending on the person. I don't want to scare you, but please understand the extent that this situation could go. Please get out right now, and don't let him con his way back into your life or try to contact you in any way again.

[Zephii]

I second what most everyone has said: Get out as fast as you can, delete the videos (because if you were one of the other girls, you'd really appreciate it!) and possibly talk to the police. But, most of all, cut contact so he cant use your heart to make you do something stupid, like forgiving him.

*hugs* we're here for you. Let us know you're alright when you can.

[loveonspeedial]

If he asked you to be exclusive, he should of known that went both ways. No double standards allowed in LDR's!!
He cheated, lied and betrayed your trust and many other womens trust by filming them, not a good sign. For all you know, there could of been other woman and he just didn't film it. You don't know. I wouldn't take my chances and I would break up and leave.I'd be a b**** and film me breaking up with me, but that's only cause I believe in karma.

[underthewater]

Hi all, just want to say thanks to your reply and support. I'm still in Hong Kong and I'm doing good. I've experienced and thought a lot in the past couple of days. Will eventually learn a lesson and grow up as a result. Thanks again you nice people!