How the hell am i gonna be able to leave???

[Caitlin2009]

As you all know im going to be visiting Denise in a few weeks for christmas and new years, then i have to go back "home" to the US. How the hell am i gonna do that??? Thats not fair to her, i visit for only a few weeks and then i break her heart by leaving again just because i gotta do a visa thing for us to get married! It's not fair, i love her with all my heart and she loves me and its just not fair that we have to leave each other a few times in order for me to finally move in with her under one roof! Nothing feels right with her, simple things like taking a walk somewhere, grocery shopping, ect is not the same without her! The last few nights ive had to listen to her sob because she misses me so much, it breaks my heart to hear her do that and hear her tell me "its not so much i want you here i do want you here... but its more like i NEED you here!!!" do you know how that makes me feel??? how much that hurts my heart to hear, I need her as well with all my heart and soul i NEED HER!!!! but in order for me to be with her forever under one roof, i have to leave my soulmate, my other half behind a few times and it hurts!!! its not fair! *Sniffles* sorry for the little rant and tears but damn it i just want to be with her now!!!!

[mllebamako]

Caitlin, breathe. Stop worrying about leaving. Don't waste your whole trip thinking about how awful it will be to say goodbye and how much LDRs suck. Accept the situation and then try to focus on enjoying the present.

[NaNi]

Well, that obviously the sucky part about LDR's. You have to say goodbye again. It hurts. Like hell. But there's really nothing you can do. It broke my heart the first time and it will break my heart again, especially since we won't see each other for another 8 or 9 months, but yeah...

[LadyMarchHare]

When there's a high, there has to be a low. What goes up, must come down. Etc. Leaving is not fair to either of you, nor is it fair to anyone who's ever visited their SO with the knowledge they're not staying forever. But you guys have a plan on when you'll be together forever and that's what matters more than the coming visit and the eventual leaving because you'll be back. You're not going and stranding her forever on a deserted island.

[amb85]

Try to calm down. Just take comfort in knowing that you have a plan mapped out and you WILL be together under one roof soon. Not everyone has that option at the moment or so soon. So just be thankful there is a light at the end of your tunnel for you two. I know how you feel...I get the same phone calls and it breaks my heart. You both have come this far and will be together for good once all of these shenanigans are taken care of. You will be together for a lifetime once its all said and done so just focus on the good.

[Silviar]

Keep it positive. You're leaving so you can come back forever, and that's what it's all about. Leaving is just temporary. Enjoy your trip, and let yourself love and be loved, and hold that when being apart is hard.

[nicole]

Just try to stop thinking of the short-term and think of the long-term- sure the good-bye is terrible and painful, but you're going back so you can be with her permanently. just think, all the hard times make the good times that much more special.

[Caitlin2009]

thanks everybody i know its only temporary but it just sucks being so far away, i know in my heart that us closing the distance is really close and most likely *knocks on wood* will be a year and half away, both of our impatience are kicking in and a visit is defiantly needed!

[Tanja]

That's the rubbish part us LDR'ers have to deal with... Don't let it spoil your trip.

[agentholli]

Caitlin, breathe. Stop worrying about leaving. Don't waste your whole trip thinking about how awful it will be to say goodbye and how much LDRs suck. Accept the situation and then try to focus on enjoying the present.

I think she said this well. I haven't met Mark yet, but I DREAD having to say goodbye to him, and we don't even have a date set to meet. that is the sucky part about an LDR..but you have a plan in motion for the future, you know what you have to do to get there, so this, the leaving her again thing..is only a temporary thing. Its just a little speed bump on the road to happiness

[Riyko]

cheer up and don't think about how you'll have to leave and come back to the US think of the positive and think of all of the stuff you'll be doing in the US to make the distance end sooner

[Talent_2]

Feeling for you hun! I try so very hard not to dwell on the leaving my SO once i get close to a visit, as i am right now, it is very easy to ruin the whole trip worrying about the goodbye at the end, and i know you really dont want to do that! Remember it is not goodbye it is see you later, you know you will be seeing her again and you will be together permanently real soon. Your really lucky you two have a bond beyond love and friendship, Make the most of every second together and dont think about leaving til the last minute, and focus on the fact that you will be together again soon!

Stay strong hun

[squiddie]

You can't obsess over this, or it will kill you. Yes, the leaving is going to happen, and it will hurt, but instead, work on planning your wedding and getting the visa issues under control.

Focus on the good stuff: you're going to be with Denise for 3 whole weeks, and in that time, you're working on the means for you two to be together for the rest of your lives. Make plans. Enjoy each other's company. Have a knock down, drag out, one hell of a time so that when you do have to get back on that plane, it's with a smile on your face, because you had the best 3 weeks of your life. Even if your heart is breaking.

Because you two will be together again, and one day, it will be for the rest of your lives.

[Jacquie]

don't think about it over and over... just think of it like this... the more time to spend away you can make up for it when you are filly together for good

[Tabitha]

My SO always says "It's not goodbye. It's see you again soon." Unfortunately, leaving is one of the biggest downsides of an LDR. Try to stay positive. You have an end in sight, and you'll get to be with her forever in due time.