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The end of the line?

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    The end of the line?

    It has been two weeks since my SO and I have split up. The reasons at first were very unclear to me when I read his email, all he said was that he no longer wants me to wait for him. We hadn't been talking much the past four months because he had been having alot of internet issues. I of course was very confused and hurt at this because he couldn't even tell me voice to voice, I just got a random email. We have had our problems over the last three years, so I kinda figured he just got tired of it all and gave up.

    Two days ago he signs onto msn and he says hello to me, we were talking for a few minutes and he tells me that for the last three weeks he's been in the hospital. Last year around June, we found out he had a stomach tumor, so he had been hospitalized for a few weeks because of that aswell. He tells me that not only is his tumor back but that the doctors have also found a mutant strand of Necrotizing Enterocolitis and believe that he doesn't have much longer (maybe up 6months). I have been going out of my mind the past two days, and today I found out that untill somwhere around February he will be in and out of the hospital during the weekdays, and possibly the weekends depending on his treatment. I have no idea what to do, and what makes it worse is that I can't be there.

    It took some courage but, on Saturday I asked him if he had told me not to wait because he learned about the seriousness of his condition. His answer was yes. He says he realised "I have no future with him, that I have my entire life ahead of me, and I shouldn't waste it on a half dead man".
    I told him that no matter what happens I will be sitting here waiting for him when ever he needs me, togeather or not. If anyone has any advice as to what I could do to keep from going comepletely insane, ideas would be earnestly welcomed.
    Thank you.

    #2
    Wow..I don't know what to say.. I'm soo sorry this is happening. I hope he can recover.

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      #3
      I think you should look into a support group for people who have loved ones dying from a serious illness. There are many stages of grief you'll be going through, and it's hard to prepare for such an event.

      Another suggestion I have is to keep in mind he might be very exhausted and unable to talk much, so finding ways to help show him your encouragement, positive attitude, and so on, will help you both. Maybe letters or postcards. Something you know he likes.

      I'm so sorry for your troubles.


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        #4
        What a terrible situation and I'm so sorry you have to go through this. I say now is the time to be the best friend he could possibly have. Go visit him if you can (and if you can't, MAKE time, FIND a way). A few weeks after my sister visited her best friend she unexpectedly passed away. My sister is ever grateful she took that time to spend it with her friend. That's what you need to do now. Be there for him.

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          #5
          speechless.
          i.am.so.damn.sorry.

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            #6
            I'm so sorry.
            LFAD Book Challenge: 4/25 Complete
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              #7
              Thank you all for the suggestions.

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                #8
                I am so sorry. I think that you should be there to support him and let him know that you are there for him, through thick and thin. Maybe join a support group too. Best of luck hun!

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                  #9
                  I am so sorry...

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                    #10
                    Oh no, I am so so sorry you have to go through such a hard time :-(
                    If I were you, I would try to be there for him all the time, would take some days off (if possible) to visit him, be there to spend some time with him, give him the feeling not to be alone.
                    Send him a letter how you feel and that you still love him so much (I think you do) and just talk as much as you can with him.
                    Maybe you could make an album of pictures of you two and write some nice words in it. So he could look into it everytime he wants to have a "look" into the past.

                    I wish you all the best of luck, for you and for him and try to stay positive!

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                      #11
                      ... can't even begin to imagine what you must be going though right now.. you, your SO, his family... I definitely second a support group. Sometimes it can mean the world to know that you're not alone...

                      I'm so, so sorry...

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                        #12
                        I am so sorry to hear this. I agree that a support group can help, and do your best to get a visit in and to let him know you're there for him. And remember we're all here for you, whatever we can do to help.


                        "You know it's love when you want to keep holding hands even after you're sweaty."
                        -- Anonymous

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