Engagement rings? Ahhhh?!

[Mfashnik]

I LOVE jewelry. It doesn't have to be expensive I just really love to wear necklaces, rings, and bracelets as much as I can. My SO has never really given me any jewelry with the exception of a beautiful necklace he and his family made me that I wear everyday. So last night I was online "window shopping" for jewelry that I could never really afford while I was talking to my SO. He started complaining about how he doesn't know anything about my taste in jewelry and I told him that it didn't really matter if he knew or not I don't expect him to buy me jewelry at all (he is in a tight financial situation right now). He got weirdly defensive about why he needs that information and generally just started to say worrisome (to me) things about the importance of him knowing what I like in rings specifically. So now I am thrown into shock and worry because WOAH hey. . . we made a rule that we cannot and I will not get engaged until at LEAST my senior year of college if not when I'm in grad school. But that isn't the point of this post. The point is to ask these questions:

What's your ideal engagement ring like?
Would you ever tell your SO that or would you ever casually drop hints or tell a friend to help him pick one out?

[Miramaid]

I think you shouldnt hope that he is gonna get you an engagement ring. I do not mean it is impossible, but for example my SO asked me a few times when would I like to have a family and children, and so far we do not have any kids and are not married Just do not keep your hopes high.

Answering your question: I am not a jewelery kind of person and I would not care about an engagement ring at all (weird huh?), I would wear a very simple marriage ring, so people know I am married, but even that could be very plain and simple.

[Rach321]

Maybe he's thinking of getting you a promise ring to show his commitment until you're both in a place to be engaged??

My ideal ring is one using a recycled diamond that comes from family. I don't like the idea of buying a new diamond. It's not worth the expense for me. I want something that is easy to wear, doesn't stick out too much. Ideally doesn't have prongs to hold in the stone (more of a bezel set would be perfect!).

I'd like something unique, feminine, but not over the top. I imagine that I will pick out the ring with my SO, but I'd also love to see what he would choose for me, and I would cherish it all the more for that reason (as long as I feel comfortable wearing it!).

[Darth_Taco]

One with his birthstone on it :P. Not only is it cheap, but it feels more personal than a diamond. Everyone does diamond, and I'm pretty sure our relationship is quite unique xD (and blasphemous ;D). There's the issue of this being a gay relationship :P. In the US, guys tend not to wear engagement rings XP. We'll probably end up trading engagement swords xD. You read that right ;D.

[Mfashnik]

I think you shouldnt hope that he is gonna get you an engagement ring. I do not mean it is impossible, but for example my SO asked me a few times when would I like to have a family and children, and so far we do not have any kids and are not married Just do not keep your hopes high.

Answering your question: I am not a jewelery kind of person and I would not care about an engagement ring at all (weird huh?), I would wear a very simple marriage ring, so people know I am married, but even that could be very plain and simple.

Please don't misunderstand. I am in NO WAY hoping for an engagement ring. In fact the concept is rather terrifying to me. I know he isn't planning on proposing or buying a ring anytime soon, but I know he' thinks about it. Which is both good and bad. It is nice to have a man so willing to commit, but I'm a little bit itchy about commitment. I think he just likes to make me squirm.

No worries. My hopes are not up. It simply got me thinking.

[FadedSunrise]

I'm a little bit inclined to agree with Darth_Taco on that one. Everyone does diamonds! Its not terribly unique. I would want my birthstone(hehe-because green is my favorite color). Otherwise, if its diamonds I want a unique shape.

[OliveOyl]

yea, when I visited my SO for Christmas, he was itching to buy me a ring, a promise ring actually, so we just went to do the ring shopping together. Unfortunately, Mexico had a lack of options, everyone is soooo petite there, and my dad blessed me with ginormous hands and feet (im a 9-10 on my ringsize and a 9.5-10 in shoes) haha, even though I am only 5'4... i feel like a clown sometimes, but LUCKILY! I found 2 that had slightly thicker bands. I couldnt decide which I liked better and neither could he, so he bought me both (rings in Mexico are super cheap compared to the US) They are 100% silver, and they both have little white/clear stones in the center. They are actually pretty, and the one I wear on my left hand is definitely my "dream" engagement ring. He loved it because it looked very "serious" and the other one I wear on my right ring finger. Before I came back home, he told me the right ring was because I was his girlfriend and he loves me. and he said the left ring was a promise ring, because he wants to marry me one day, and should be my constant reminded of our love, and to work on trusting him. We talked about engagement/wedding rings too. We both like verrrrry simple! which is good! So, it definitely makes waking up every morning sans beautiful novio a lot easier. Unfortunately, can't find a single person to dance with at a club! lol but its nice, because now I definitely know who my real guy pals are! haha. (one of them disappeared). So, who knows?! maybe its an i love you ring, maybe he just wants to mark his territory (so to speak---thats what my boo wanted out of the rings as well--jaja), maybe he wants to marry you one day, maybe its a promise ring! lol who knows?! maybe its just small talk!! Just keep happy & optimistic!!

[OliveOyl]

PS: promise ring was super exciting and super terrifying!! because I too am "itchy" on commitment, but I don't know... I also told myself I would never date anyone not in the same city as me, and now im committed to someone in an entirely different country! lol anything is possible when your happy and that person brings out your good qualities.

[LadyEcstsasy]

My SO and I actually danced around this issue about a month ago lol He was asking questions and fretting about not knowing what my ring size is. He tried to be subtle but that's kind of hard to pull off for him, and I'm good at figuring him out when he tries to play it cool. He ended up getting me a silver promise ring with little white stones inlaid on top. I love it so much and wear it every day. It serves as a good reminder that he loves me and is committed to working things out between us no matter what, with the intent of proposing to me some day. It was kind of scary to committ, but I'm glad that he's committed to me it put me at ease so I'd stop worrying about him up and leaving me like a lot of my exes did, and best of all, he understands if I get a little hesitant sometimes about whether I'm for sure that we'll make it.

Anywho, I've shopped around a bit, but not seriously so I'm not sure what kind of engagement ring I'd like. Can't go wrong with diamonds of course XD but I'd want something modest and elegant, small or medium-ish diamond (or diamonds) on one of the intricate sort of bands (my english skills are failing me to describe it sorry lol, like I said, I really don't do much shopping, I don't want to give into temptation and get too hopeful)

[lucybelle]

I have blatantly told my SO that I don't like big diamonds, and he knows I like unique things. If we get engaged, I hope he lets me help pick out the ring or he gets me something small, no diamonds, and funky. Or, I could give him one of the rings I already have to do the proposing with. No need to buy more when I have beautiful rings already!

But, that won't be any time soon. He doesn't even know my size!

[rivi87]

yea My SO is as I like to tell him "not sneaky at all". I know he's up to something he has my mother and sisters in on it...(now they are all facebook friends..cooincidence?). He already knows my rign size bc we took my sister to get a "fake ring for college". All my friends believe its only a matter of time

Now like the rest of you I also have been itchy about that serious of a commitment. My mother has not been involved in good marriages (been divorced twice) and I have seen the damage and experienced it firsthand. This is not something I would ever take lightly but for me to say I am very open to the idea is a big step for me. But my SO is the most attentive, sweet and overall incredible man I could have ever wanted and if he were to ask me before he deploys to marry him I would say yes

[MrsExPrez]

Hahaha for some reason the whole idea of "his birthstone" ring gave me a giggle, mainly because he was born in April and it would still be a diamond for me even if I wanted to go that route instead! I am destined for a big fat diamond, ladies and gentlemen!

[8983MilesofLove]

I'm a little bit inclined to agree with Darth_Taco on that one. Everyone does diamonds! Its not terribly unique. I would want my birthstone(hehe-because green is my favorite color). Otherwise, if its diamonds I want a unique shape.

I've always wanted welsh clogau gold engagment and wedding rings, but for a little while I also wanted an Australian Opal engagment ring because I wanted something different, but in the end I decided I love diamonds way to much, so I had my heart set on the Welsh Gold one. Luckily my SO knew this and I know he got me the ring (he can't keep secrets), we've discussed when we want to get engaged and I said when I'm 20, which is in a few months...so seeing as he has the ring I'm hoping it will be this year! *fingers crossed* :P
So even though mine is diamond, at the same time it's totally unique because it's welsh gold, which is really rare (they don't even make my engagment ring anymore...my SO got the last one!), and it also has the word 'Cariad' which is welsh for love/sweetheart inscribed in the inside of the ring, it's also small and simple, which i love. It's literally my perfect ring. It's unique...but still diamond

[nicole]

My SO and I had a huge arguement about this last year- I didn't want diamonds, and all the rings I picked out to show him weren't the traditional style at all. He sort of freaked because it wasn't what he was expecting. So we have come to a compromise! I am getting a 3-stone ring with a low, white gold setting, a diamond in the middle with a sapphire on either side of it.

He went ring shopping yesterday and was telling me how much information he got lol he was so proud of himself! I had only been wanting a 1/2 carat diamond (or smaller) and he had been insisting on 3/4s, thankfully after the trip and he saw how huge the 3/4s was, he decided I would hate that and stick with 1/2. Thank goodness, a 1/2 carat is expensive enough! I really hate people spending too much money on me!

[mllebamako]

One with his birthstone on it :P. Not only is it cheap, but it feels more personal than a diamond. Everyone does diamond, and I'm pretty sure our relationship is quite unique xD (and blasphemous ;D).

That's what we did! Well, my engagement ring has HIS birthstone on it and his engagement necklace has MY birthstone on it. They are beautiful and definitely more "us" than a solitaire diamond. I was never a flashy nor have I ever been someone who gets something just because everyone else has it.
Most people tell me how beautiful and original my ring is. Although I have gotten a snarky comment or two from girls who act all shocked that it's an engagement ring..."OHhhh well, I didn't think it was because it wasn't a diaaaamoond"