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A Positive Note --long--

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    A Positive Note --long--

    So EVERYONE is breaking up! I know someone else posted something along these same lines a couple days ago, but I felt like making a different post and maybe it'll make someone smile.. Although I'm rather selfish, this is mainly for me to remember all the good things about my relationship :P

    I gotta say that my SO is perhaps one of the greatest men on earth (Don't we all say that?). Recently, he and I have been having a varied amount of difficulties with time, which is quite a significant factor in every LDR. I'm homeschooled and graduating in May; he's in his first semester in college. He has day classes as well as a job in the day so we don't talk much, and that gives me a lot of time to finish my high school classes and try to finish up in March or April instead of May.

    We realized that he needs a switch in jobs for confidential reasons, but with that he'll need to work in the day and do classes at night. Fine right? Well.. Yeah, then I realized something. I'll be working starting as soon as I graduate (have a job lined up at my grandparents' business) which is the typical 8-5 job with an hour for lunch. That leaves me about 30 mins total, if my SO is not busy, to talk in the day. He'll end up getting home around 10 and I send him to bed at 10:30 because he needs to be up at 6:30 and he desperately needs the sleep to fully function in his busy schedule. Once I realized I get to call him for half an hour on some days, I quite frankly was a bit devastated. I've just gotten used to his going to college, now he's going to be gone more in the next semester.

    He saw the look in my eyes (I have difficulty talking openly with virtually anyone as a result of my past) and immediately knew what was wrong. He comforted me, told me he loved me, and told me no matter what happens or how busy he is, he's always thinking of me and misses me and wishes he could hold me all day long. How sweet is that?

    I have a much rougher past than he does, so I have many walls he's had to work hard to break through. Well as a result of my past, I have anxiety issues and depression issues amongst my 9 or 10 (I lost count) physical issues. Because of the anxiety and depression, anything that could seem insignificant can be made significant which leaves me a bit hard to deal with. This never seems to phase my SO. He and I were drifting a little far apart because of the lack of quality time together each day, so we ended up talking about it and it was fixed right up. This happens a lot with us -- he's so great to me and knows exactly what fixes every problem.

    So I'm rambling now. Stop reading at any point :P

    The whole thing I really wanted to say is this. Every relationship, no matter how hard it gets, can make it with the proper amount of tender love and care. Listening to each other, talking through problems, never getting off the computer with them or off the phone with them while upset, and understanding and embracing your differences. I'm happy to say that in the entire year he and I have known each other, we have never once had a true argument. We've had our differences of opinions, and have gotten frustrated with each other having a different point of view, but every time that's happened, we've been able to talk it through and find a mutual ground that we both agree on. If he's upset, or angry, or sad, or just having a really crappy day, somehow I'm able to fix it in 2 minutes flat. And somehow, he's able to do the same.

    I love my SO more than I could ever love any man on this earth. He loves me more than I ever thought I could be loved by anyone! And I know that no matter what happens, he and I will never have to face what so many of you precious people are having to endure -- breakup. I now wear a promise ring with my name and birthstone, and his name and birthstone on it. It represents that I am promised to him forever, and he is promised to me and when the time is right, he and I will become engaged and proceed in getting married. And I honestly can't wait.

    So everyone that has been feeling down as a result of the breakups posted here, remember. There's always hope. There are many people here that are head over heels in love with their SO, some that are finally closing the distance, and some that are engaged. So you can see, not everything ends in breakup. I know my relationship won't.

    Ok I'm done rambling now. Toodles!

    #2
    Aw.

    My SO and I are also still going strong. We talk about ending the distance, moving in together, maybe getting engaged and married.

    We even talked about how we might be able to end the distance next year. She could come over after she finishes uni and she could stay with my mom and I until I earned enough money to follow her back to New Zealand or somewhere else.

    I want to spend my whole life with this gorgeous, beautiful woman!

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      #3
      my relationship wont end up like that either, i mean hell were planning our wedding which is in a few months, we already have our own place to live, and sometime next year were gonna be closing the distance! I know for some people they have to wait a few years to end the distance and thats frusterates them even when some have kids, but i keep saying theres always a way to fix things and find solutions to problems including ending the distance, you just gotta try and figure it out

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        #4
        It's good to hear someone writing something positive. I think it's important for people to remember that people ask for more help during turbulence, and do less posts celebrating the joys; I commend you for posting something positive - it's so good to see you guys working as a team to stay on balance.


        LFAD Book Challenge: 34/100 Complete

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          #5
          Thanks for being so positive! It really is a breath of fresh air! And way to be confident! My own relationship is going great but I'm constantly worried...it's something I'm working hard on to fix. As of the future, we have discussed marriage and closing the distance but it can't be until after we both finish school, which won't be until 2016 at the earliest....and somehow with jobs and student loans we'll need to pay off, I'm just assuming we can't until 2018. It makes it a little depressing to think of...

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            #6
            Reading this definitely was a good start to my day, it's good to hear something positve. Especially with all the breaks up I've been hearing about - not just on here, but among my personal friend circle as well. Facebook wasn't kidding about a lot of people breaking up =/. My SO and I have hit some rough patches but somehow he always gets me to keep going when I want to throw in the towel and quit. Knowing that he has put his faith in me and thinks that we'll pull through makes me want to try harder to prove him right. We won't be closing the distance for what feels like a while - and there's a lot of unknown factors that could screw it up but I know he's the one I want to spend the rest of my life with, so we'll make it work

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              #7
              Thanks for lightening the mood! As for my relationship, it's very early at this point so who knows. But I know he makes me happy, and I make him happy. He'll send me texts with things like "I know you're stressed out but whatever you do don't stop smiling. The world is all a little grayer when it doesn't have your smile in it," and when he told me he hoped that our v-day together would be good, I reminded him that he'll be the first thing I'll see in the morning, the last thing I see at night, and I'll get to spend the whole day with him. It couldn't get much better than that.

              Regardless of what happens in the long run, he has made me feel special and treasured, and made me like myself as a person. He has been a positive influence on my life, and I hope I've been one on his as well.


              "You know it's love when you want to keep holding hands even after you're sweaty."
              -- Anonymous

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                #8
                These positive feelings are just what everyone needs, especially in LDRs. It gets tough and we all need reassurance. I LOVED your post and thought it was so cute. I feel the same way about my SO that you do, but we haven't talked about the distant future yet. I still think it's too soon, just seeing the rate our relationship has progressed. We're taking things very slowly and I'm enjoying the ride. =]

                "Do I love you? My God, if your love were a grain of sand, mine would be a universe of beaches."

                Like a drum, my heart never stops beating for you.

                Comment


                  #9
                  Originally posted by nic&matt View Post
                  Thanks for being so positive! It really is a breath of fresh air! And way to be confident! My own relationship is going great but I'm constantly worried...it's something I'm working hard on to fix. As of the future, we have discussed marriage and closing the distance but it can't be until after we both finish school, which won't be until 2016 at the earliest....and somehow with jobs and student loans we'll need to pay off, I'm just assuming we can't until 2018. It makes it a little depressing to think of...
                  I'm feeling the same. The ending distance for me could happen a little earlier than you-- May 2013--- but even then, we probably won't have moved in together. We'll just be more local (anything is better!).

                  Thanks for the post, I'm thinking about bookmarking it. All of these breakups are so sad! I know things happen but they always get to me, I just want everyone to be happy you know. It can also be quite triggering at times for me personally.

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                    #10
                    I definitely know how you both feel. My SO and I won't be closing the distance until late 2012 or early 2013 -- however long it takes for me to have the money. And in that case I'll be picking up my entire life and leaving my family, home, church, relatives, etc here in Texas and moving to an apartment in SC -- we also won't be moving in together for a couple years after that when we decide to get married lol.

                    BUT. It's totally worth it. It's a looooong ways away, but I enjoy looking forward to it -- knowing that every penny I earn is a penny closer to being within a 5 minute drive of my man.. I can't wait!! Waiting 2 1/2 years for a lifetime with my baby? I think it's worth it

                    Comment


                      #11
                      Thanks for the lovely positive post Sarah

                      There are loads of people still very happy together, which makes me happy. And it's good to focus on the positive, and not let fear get in.

                      We're very very very happy in love. We're still just as in love as when we first fell in love. He still makes my heart flutter. It has only been 6 months together so far, but we fell in love almost immediately, and we knew very quickly that we wanted to spend the rest of our lives together. I have no idea when we're going to be able to close the distance, but I am determind it will happen. And until that happens I'm going to make the most of being in love and having him in my life and whatever time I do get with him.

                      Wishing everyone happy hopeful relationships

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