Nervous!

[ErikaH]

Hi everyone, I'm Erika and I've been in a LDR for over 2 years. Has anyone ever had the misfortune of your parents/family disapproving of you talking to someone you've never met in person? Unfortunately, that's my case.

To make a long story short, I'm not supposed to be talking to my SO, since my parents banned me, but I simply couldn't let him go. I've been hiding this fact for almost 2 years behind my parents backs, and I've decided I'm tired of fighting and keeping secrets from them, and am going to tell them tomorrow that I am still talking to him. I have no idea how they'll react. I could get kicked out of the house, or they'll stop paying for college. (Mom's threatened those, anyway.) I'm nervous, and yet ready to tell. Wish me luck tomorrow! I hope I don't sound like a horrible daughter for keeping this behind their backs. :S

[Kiara]

Erika, I haven't got a similar story, I for sure I wish you good luck with your LDR and with your parents!

[ErikaH]

Thank you very much! Much appreciated.

[vpavelock]

I wish you all the luck!

[Freckles]

Oh, Erika, my heart goes out to you. That really is a tough one.

I don't think you're a horrible daughter for keeping it from your parents; rather, I think it speaks volumes in terms of you being a good PERSON for deciding to tell them now. That takes a tremendous amount of courage despite the possible outcome. If anything, I would find their motives as PARENTS questionable if they actually follow through on their threats. (Sorry :/)

Hopefully they'll see, since this is something that has lasted 2 years, that it obviously means a lot to you and it's something you're more dedicated to than they ever imagined.

I wish you all the best with this dilemma...please, do keep us posted on how it goes. We're here for you!

[ErikaH]

Oh, Erika, my heart goes out to you. That really is a tough one.

I don't think you're a horrible daughter for keeping it from your parents; rather, I think it speaks volumes in terms of you being a good PERSON for deciding to tell them now. That takes a tremendous amount of courage despite the possible outcome. If anything, I would find their motives as PARENTS questionable if they actually follow through on their threats. (Sorry :/)

Hopefully they'll see, since this is something that has lasted 2 years, that it obviously means a lot to you and it's something you're more dedicated to than they ever imagined.

I wish you all the best with this dilemma...please, do keep us posted on how it goes. We're here for you!

Thank you very much, Freckles. I hope that they see it too, as you see it. I hope they (and by 'they', I mostly mean my mom) can see that I'm not a little girl anymore, and that I am able to take care of myself now. I just wonder why I hadn't gotten the courage to tell them earlier. I sure will keep you updated on what happens tomorrow! It means so much to me that there are people here for me, who know what I'm experiencing. Thanks again.

[Freckles]

You are most welcome. Stay strong!

[loveknowsnodistance27]

Best of luck, and try and stay strong! I doubt they'll think you're a terrible daughter, because you're not! I think you're very brave for telling them about this and I think that they'll see that you're serious about this relationship. =]

[komakino]

Hey Erika,

I wish you all the luck tomorrow when talking to your parents. I dont think you have been a bad daughter at all, your parents have put you into this situation and i think you are being very brave by standing up to them. I know it cant be easy.

My situation isnt quite the same as yours; my parents do know about my SO and while they are suportive and want me to be happy, my mother in a recent conversation admitted that she worries about certain factors in our relationship. Things like the age gap (29 and 21) and that we may be at "different times in our life". My mother wants very much to be a grandmother, and as im coming up to those "child years" i guess she worries that what i have with my SO wont last because of the distance, and his age, and that it may be too late after then for me to settle down an have kids. Now i love my mother to death, but shes can be a very pushy woman sometimes, and our little 'chats' have caused me tears in the past. But besides this she has been suportive, and i do know she only wants the best for me, so i take what she says with a pinch of salt.

On the other side is my SO's parents who do not know about me at all which is not at all an issue for me. To be quite honest im rather nervous about meeting his family, and to top it off hes part of a triplet. lol. Anyway, after he finished uni he went back to live with his parents while hes working on his teaching qualification and until he can get a full time job, and because hes at home I guess he doesnt want to rock the boat, which i fully understand.

I know that it wont be the easiest for his parents to swallow thats hes got with a older woman who lives no where near him, and the fact he doesnt have as open relationship as i do with his parents works against the situation. Hes worried they will have a simlar reaction as your parents have, and make it dificult for us to see each other. And to be quite honest, i couldnt bare not being able to be with him.

I hope everything works out for you

[AllieBaba]

I just wanted to wish you good luck!!! I hope that once you tell them they realize that this is no joke since you guys have been together for quite a bit now.

[Sarah M]

Best of luck!

[ErikaH]

Hey Erika,

I wish you all the luck tomorrow when talking to your parents. I dont think you have been a bad daughter at all, your parents have put you into this situation and i think you are being very brave by standing up to them. I know it cant be easy.

My situation isnt quite the same as yours; my parents do know about my SO and while they are suportive and want me to be happy, my mother in a recent conversation admitted that she worries about certain factors in our relationship. Things like the age gap (29 and 21) and that we may be at "different times in our life". My mother wants very much to be a grandmother, and as im coming up to those "child years" i guess she worries that what i have with my SO wont last because of the distance, and his age, and that it may be too late after then for me to settle down an have kids. Now i love my mother to death, but shes can be a very pushy woman sometimes, and our little 'chats' have caused me tears in the past. But besides this she has been suportive, and i do know she only wants the best for me, so i take what she says with a pinch of salt.

On the other side is my SO's parents who do not know about me at all which is not at all an issue for me. To be quite honest im rather nervous about meeting his family, and to top it off hes part of a triplet. lol. Anyway, after he finished uni he went back to live with his parents while hes working on his teaching qualification and until he can get a full time job, and because hes at home I guess he doesnt want to rock the boat, which i fully understand.

I know that it wont be the easiest for his parents to swallow thats hes got with a older woman who lives no where near him, and the fact he doesnt have as open relationship as i do with his parents works against the situation. Hes worried they will have a simlar reaction as your parents have, and make it dificult for us to see each other. And to be quite honest, i couldnt bare not being able to be with him.

I hope everything works out for you

Your support means a lot to me, thank you! I know how you feel, about your mom being worried about certain aspects of your relationship. I hope that everything works out for you two, once he tells his parents - which I'm sure it will! Even if they do have a bad reaction, you're both certainly adults, and am perfectly able to be together. I hope everything works out for you too.

[ErikaH]

Best of luck, and try and stay strong! I doubt they'll think you're a terrible daughter, because you're not! I think you're very brave for telling them about this and I think that they'll see that you're serious about this relationship. =]

Thank you. I only hope that they see it that way too. I feel a lot more courageous now, after seeing all these wonderful responses.

[paulawriteslove]

Best of luck! Stay strong!!

[princessmeg1328]

Good luck! I hope that everything goes well for you.