Right ok i dont know what the hell is wrong with me lately or why i decided to push the boundaries of our relationship the last couple of days, but lately i have been super over sensitive to the point of questioning Denise's love for me and stuff, the last few days i was depressed and she knew so she tried to keep me calm all the while her mom was over, and in the process of worrying over me whenever she gets over stressed her TMJ acts up which makes her jaw hurt really bad and today it started to heal again but for some odd reason i questioned her loving me again today, because i was being nostalgic and she was watching a movie so i wasent getting much of a response to which i told her "well im trying to be nostalgic and it seems like you dont care....." *smacks forhead* lets just say i got majorly yelled at to the point where she actually threatened to shut her phone off if i didnt stop, i didnt want that so i called up and apologized alot, to which she said "FOR GODS SAKE I LOVE YOU!! WHEN ARE YOU GONNA GET THAT THROUGH YOUR HEAD!!!!!!!!" well today it got through, because at that moment if i didnt patch things up i would have lost the one person that means so much to me!!! It scares me to think about how close i came to that, and its all down to this stupid little fear that i have about not thinking i deserve all the happyness in my life or fear that if i let my guard down shes gonna run off or something!! I mean i finally let it go but, i dont wanna go through that again i dont wanna put her through that again, i dont wanna let that fear overrule our relationship!!! that was waaay to close

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