Resentment?

[NaNi]

I don't really get jealous. Although I obviously dislike the fact that so many people can spend time with my SO and I can't. Because we could do so much. Every single day. I especially get sad when my SO tells me that I would have been invited to parties if I were there, but she has to go alone every time. It's no fun.

[princessmia]

Hey Justin
I don't really get jealous of people..they are there and that's that. I don't really resent anyone..except for the girls who hit on him, lol.
There are moments where he's around someone and I get a little jealous because it's like 'Ugh, I wish I was them!' or his brother will come in the room and touch him, hug him or kiss him just to piss him off or sit on him..and I know it's weird but it's like..I wish I could do that
I'm probably just weird, but I THINK he feels the same way about me, or worse.

[MissShortie]

Yes! totally...
I've told Clay before that I'm jealous of his friends and he seemed really baffled by that and ha asked why, I told him the truth, they get to see him everyday and to hang out with him whenever they want...

[Miramaid]

I did not read the comments, but yes I do resent. If it is female friends I do resent, tho I rarely tell him and it eats me up a lot. I admit that. HE used to be the same. Well I guess he still is the same, but he used to resent pretty much anyone at all in my life who would require my time, including my mother. And he would show it and we had issues over it. Now I think the roles somewhat switched and he is way more indifferent or tries to seem indifferent, and I am the one who is concerned all the time. Our relationship is not the healthiest one tho and I admit that, so that makes it even harder. But I love him and I am working on being better overall, just be a better person and I swallow my resentment a lot of time. BUT!!!! There is a line that I think people should draw. I know I have a big problem with that. Resentment over something that you know you should not resent is one thing, but if your SO is abusing your emotions and does smth hurtful too many times, like going out with a female a lot (or vise verse) and does it all the time, doesn't tell you and doesnt ask you if you are ok with that etc. then I do not think it is resentment, it is a defense mechanism and you would NOT be overreacting if you bring it up (tho there is always a risk to be called controlling and insecure which usually happens)

[machstx]

I mean It sucks that his friends get to see him more than I do but he comes home and we talk about his night and sometimes says Iwish you were there. So Im not really jealous his friends cant replace me. BUT i know what you mean its probably not pure jealosy your feeling maybe more likke bummed they get to spend more time with her than you

[erinewelsh]

I would say it's normal. Someone else has the opportunity to have the person that we find amazing in their everyday life and sometimes we become afraid that they might see how amazing they are too. My boyfriend has recently made a new female friend, which I was a little worried about because she was the girl that ended up helping him when he had some emotional problems , but I later realized that she is not a real threat and I can tell he has no interest in the girl (and idc if she has interest because he won't let her make a move.) When you two have such separate lives, it's bound to come up that you will find separate friends of BOTH genders.

How to vent these feelings... hmm. For me I mostly try to remind myself that he is with ME through all the pain of distance for a reason. I can be kind of crappy at dealing with it sometimes and I do question my boyfriend much more than I should. Sometimes this makes him upset because he doesn't want me to worry and he reaffirms that he cares. I think what helps is that he would basically stop hanging with someone or stop doing something because it worries me. Although I do not believe in controlling him, it's nice to know that if I'd rather he didn't drink he actually cares enough to not if I'll feel better about it.

I completely agree. It's important to remember that LDRs ARE TOUGH! If she didn't care about you, she wouldn't be putting herself through the pain and anguish that an LDR can cause. I often find myself defending my LDR to people, and one of my strongest arguments is that I think my relationship is stronger than any of theirs, because we have to endure more on a daily basis. There are no "easy days." I have to deal with missing him every single day. Even little things that wouldn't normally be a problem are made into problems because I have to face them alone. I have had to sit and watch my boyfriend cry because his sons told him they didn't want to come over since he would be the only one home. They love hanging out with their dad, but they'd rather be with their mother and her partner. If I were there, they would choose us in a heartbeat. Of course, you're going to be jealous of her friends. They get to see her and be with her in a way that you can't right now. It's only natural to want that. It would be weird if you didn't. Just know to identify what is resentment and what might be a legitimate concern. Communication is everything!

[loveknowsnodistance27]

Not really...it's normal, but I generally don't feel jealousy or resentment. Sometimes I do, because he's made so many friends at college. I've met a ton of people at my college, but because it's a commuter school, I only really have 1 or 2 close college friends. He's became friends with a few girls on floor, but he'd never ever think of cheating on me. I do get a little jealous when he talks about all the fun events his floormates and him get to do, but I'm also so happy that he's having fun. I do have fun with friends here, too.

[paulawriteslove]

I'm glad that my boyfriend hangs out with his friends, but sometimes I have to admit that I do get jealous. I wish that he would stay home and talk to me. But I am so happy that he has a life and hangs out with his friends. I've met them, and they're so nice!

[Dziubka]

I'm glad that my boyfriend hangs out with his friends, but sometimes I have to admit that I do get jealous. I wish that he would stay home and talk to me. But I am so happy that he has a life and hangs out with his friends. I've met them, and they're so nice!

Exactly.
I've caught myself wishing that he'd stay at home and talk to me and even being pissed off when we couldn't talk for a day, because he had gone out with friends. But really... I'd feel cheated (in the sence of false advertising) if he stopped meeting his friends to talk to me on skype. One thing I like about him is that he likes going out and having a good time. As much as I want him to call me everyday and talk for hours, I wouldn't want a boyfriend who'd spend his weekends alone in his room with his computer.

It's not really on topic, but I do get slightly jealous when I see my friends with their CD SOs. I can't help but feeling that it's unfair that they get to see each other everyday and I have to wait weeks to see my boyfriend (I know.... and I perfectly understand everyone who'll now go "and I'm jealous that you two get to see each other every couple of weeks" True that. The word's not fair)

[Jrapp]

Exactly.
It's not really on topic, but I do get slightly jealous when I see my friends with their CD SOs. I can't help but feeling that it's unfair that they get to see each other everyday and I have to wait weeks to see my boyfriend (I know.... and I perfectly understand everyone who'll now go "and I'm jealous that you two get to see each other every couple of weeks" True that. The word's not fair)

^That happens to me too, it sucks.

Thank you everyone for your comments. Now I'll go more into depth with what I feel, lol. Most often I get the feeling of, "UGH! I wish that was me!!" "They are so lucky!" type thing. I never worry that the other person means more to her, as she's told me plenty of times (without me trying to get such a response) that she would MUCH rather be with me. I am happy when she goes out, because I know it makes her really happy! I've never told her I'd rather her stay home or anything like that. In fact, she's stopped a lot of going out like she used to. I think she did it for me, but I'm not sure. I never told her to, but I think she caught on it was making me sad. Regardless, we both make sacrifices for each other and if that is truly what she wants to do I can't say no. I've even told her she should hang out with her best friend more, but she insists she doesn't want to =p. Also, I wish that I didn't get sad and feel the way I do, but as you all know it's next to impossible to control feelings- at least for me.

Sorry this was so long! Again, I thank you all for the posts. I found them quite insightful(: