I don't think I could....

[Heather]

Some people go online with the intentions of looking for a partner and that's pretty okay.. whether they are looking locally for a partner, or LD. (I don't know why someone would search to have a LDR, but some do I guess) But for me personally, I wasn't searching for a LDR nor was I looking for a relationship in general really.. I was looking for a friend, someone to talk to and share stories with. You build a connection I guess, you bond and really get to know someone through the internet and on the phone etc. Sure some could be fake, but if you really talk to someone everyday and spend time with them via the internet, you really get a feel for whether or not they are real.

It's definitely not easy and it's not something I would encourage someone to do. (My brother always asks if I can "hook him up" with one of my online friends or if I have any single friends. I look at him like hes crazy and ask why?) Anyways, sidetracking here I guess but..

How did I do it? Love, Trust, Communication, Faith.

Also, if there is a connection/true love and it's more than just a relationship that is one-sided or not very "real" then MOST times you will still feel that connection "in person" at least, with my experience it's been that way

[WakeUpSusie]

Whoa whoa whoa...

For those of you who took offense to that for some reason, that was not in any way written to offend people. I made that perfectly clear from the beginning. I, personally, can not imagine that type of situation working for me or any relationship that I would think about getting into. The reason I posted the question was to better understand how and why relationships like that work, from people in situations that are clearly working out just fine. I am genuinely curious, and not closed minded in the least. Don't forget, I am in a long distance relationship too, albeit under slightly different circumstances. Why would I want to offend people who are in more or less the same situation as me? I know how much it sucks.

Anyway, thanks for the positive responses ladies and gents It's interesting to see how the internet and social networking brings people together in beautiful ways... and to think that the internet didn't even exist twenty years ago. Very cool. I wish you all the best of luck, and keep responding if you want to!

[LadyMarchHare]

Whoa whoa whoa...

For those of you who took offense to that for some reason, that was not in any way written to offend people. I made that perfectly clear from the beginning. I, personally, can not imagine that type of situation working for me or any relationship that I would think about getting into. The reason I posted the question was to better understand how and why relationships like that work, from people in situations that are clearly working out just fine. I am genuinely curious, and not closed minded in the least. Don't forget, I am in a long distance relationship too, albeit under slightly different circumstances. Why would I want to offend people who are in more or less the same situation as me? I know how much it sucks.

Anyway, thanks for the positive responses ladies and gents It's interesting to see how the internet and social networking brings people together in beautiful ways... and to think that the internet didn't even exist twenty years ago. Very cool. I wish you all the best of luck, and keep responding if you want to!

I think the reason some people are taking offense is when someone says they can't imagine something like that actually working, even if they mean just for them, people wanna be quick to say "well it works for ME" and try and prove that what you can't imagine can be imagined, made reality, and work out. I pretty much thought the same thing when I was younger and my best friend dated solely online. I couldn't see me enduring that sort of crap and couldn't see how she could. It's just one of those things you're not sure about until you get put on the spot.

Unfortunately with text, wording is crucial and I think the way you worded your initial post makes it come off slightly rude or just judgmental. It happens to the best of us, goodness knows I've done it enough to start drama on this board.

[WakeUpSusie]

I mean... I thought that out very carefully so as not to come off as judgmental. I wanted it to be perfectly clear that I didn't think it would work for ME, not for all relationships, and I think I did that. But, c'est la vie, I suppose it's hard to understand tone in a post and people read things differently. Thank you for your input

[LadyMarchHare]

Like I said, text is a hard thing to control. You can re-word something ten times and chances are someone's gonna read it wrong. I figured you didn't mean anything rude by what you said, it's something that doesn't work for everyone and lots of people can't really see themselves being serious with someone they only see pictures of or never see in person.

[Alisz]

I wasn't offended (I'm used to that question actually hehe) and understood you were curious, but it was kinda pointed out by other ladies that you could find your answer all over the board as a good number of members are in that situation. Just look at all the stories in the LDR Stories sub-forum. I just saw it kinda strange for your first post on the board. It's not unheard of that people could want to stir the pot. :/ Not saying that was your intention, but there's plenty of people (especially online) that do.

As Heather mentioned, the majority of people probably didn't go searching for LDRs online. They just sorta happened. I agree that it's amazing how technology has changed the world. I mean, you can sign up for Twitter and tell your favourite celebrity whatever you want instantly. There's a good chance that they'll read it too. ^^ And with streaming video chat added on it makes for a good substitute for talking to someone across a table. Despite the advances though, it seems like to understand it one has to experience it. My friends & family have tried to understand and they've seen me in LDRs and sorta live them through me, but still don't "get it." They don't get why someone would put themselves through all that hardship when they could date someone locally. It wasn't a choice because you don't get to choose who you fall in love with, it just happens. :P And it can sound just as silly as someone saying, "Why did you marry so-and-so and not someone else?" hehe

[heatherotic]

I fall into both categories and I think it makes our relationship stronger than any other that I've been in. We were together for four months before we met and we don't have a definite end in sight, but we kind of have plans to end the distance.

I feel like this one is much better because we got to know each other before we physically met. I love being with him and the only thing I would change is the distance. But I feel like, for the most part, it doesn't diminish our relationship. It makes us stronger since we can survive being 1,100 miles away.

[LostInLove]

I fall into the second category. It's hard, and I wish I knew for sure what kind of timeline I was looking at. That said, I know that we love each other very much and that we'll do everything we can to make it work. His love keeps me going.

[bigmac62]

I only fall into #2, myself, and it's my belief that love never fails you that keeps me going. If it's truly meant to be, it doesn't matter when it happens, just that it happens. Whe everything begins to calm down and one of us gets a steady job, we'll get it together. I know in my heart that this thing will work out and everything will fall into place, one way or another.

[Rugger]

I fall into 2 as well. I thought our distance was closed. He moved in with me while trying to find a job, but that's didn't work and he ended up going home. That's been the worst part for me. We don't know when we are going to close the distance, it all really depends on where he gets a job. I have to stay put til at least August, but after that I'm a free agent. So we shall see.

[H87]

I didn't meet my SO in person before we got into a relationship, and personally I kind of liked it that way. It allowed us to really get to know each other and to really form a emotional connection without physical stuff getting in the way.
My SO and I did not have a set date when we got into a relationship and we still don't but we are hoping to close the distance within the next eighteen months.
Love keeps us going. We have no doubt that we are meant for each other, and neither one of us is willing to give that up. No matter what may come our way we will deal with it because we love each other.

[Jrapp]

I fall into both. I met Brianna in May of 2010 and we started dating August 25 of the same year. We still haven't met, but that will change come April 20th, just 43 days.

Secondly, we are both still unable to have a concrete date set to end this distance. It should hopefully be in a about 14 or 15 months, but we can't guarantee it.