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    Flirting is it okay?

    Kay heres a question for you all. If i can get both guys and girls opinions on this one. Do you believe its okay to playfully flirt with others? Or is that not okay. My SO is always open with me but he goes out sometimes with his friends and before he was telling me how he went out and bought these girls drinks. So i assume there was probably some innocent flirting. Which i don't love, i want him to be mine only but im not upset cause i know his heart is mine. Ive asked him before if he is a natural flirt and he's all idk lol so he might be, but lucky for me he doesnt hang with alot of girls. So whats your take on flirting? Do you think its okay if its innocent, should there not be any, lol opinions, thoughts, and replys!
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    #2
    I personally don't think it's right, I would be upset if I found out my guy had been flirting with other girls, I know he wouldn't though. He knows how I feel about flirting and I'm pretty sure he's only interested in me. I'd never want to flirt with anybody either, my guy is my world and the only person I want.
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      #3
      Depends on your definition of flirting. I think it's ok for my SO to go out and talk to girls and have fun. I talk to boys when I go out, it's not like I'm just going to stop being social because I have a boyfriend. We both always mention we're taken in some shape or form anyway. And, speaking for myself here, if someone starts to cross a line, I tell them to back off sharpish.

      If it was more then talking, like he was buying them drinks and being a bit more amorous (I mean like flirty and leading them on, or just letting them hit on him) ... I probably wouldn't be so happy. Though it might irk me, it would take a lot for me to lose a gasket though. A little jealousy is normal, remember, but you can't ban someone from talking to other people.

      <3 The day we met : 10.31.2009
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      The Day we went long distance: 08.08.2010
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        #4
        definitely going to have to agree with nicole. However, the last visit I had, I had been drinking, my SO was wasted, and went to the bathroom. 15 minutes went by and he hadn't come back yet. I found him talking to a girl and I totally flipped out. Turns out it was a friend from university he hadnt seen since he became a teacher..and she was expecting a child with her fiance.. (facebook clarified this, lol). Needless to say I felt bad, but I also did not think I was wrong, because he saw me walk into the room and tap my foot while he wrapped up his conversation. He should have introduced me! lol. I am totally ranting now, sorry...

        flirting is okay in some cases, with friends, but, I figure, theres a very ambiguous line between flirting and being friendly when you first meet people, eh? Its only flirting if one of you thinks its flirting. BUT, may not be so intentional.

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          #5
          i dont see anything wrong with it, as long as it doesnt go beyond sticking your tongue down someones throat then little bit of flirting is fine

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            #6
            Cheating starts on flirting... that's my opinion...Be honest to him and say to him your feelings about this and i know he will understand you.
            "Love wins everything especially fear."

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              #7
              A little flirting is fine with me. It reminds me what I have and why I need to hold onto it. Just the other night we went out salsa dancing. Because I have feet problems, and he's a lot better at dancing than me anyways, I encouraged him to go dance with other girls. I really like seeing him with other girls, then the song would end and he would come over to me and kiss me.

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                #8
                As some have already stated - a little flirting is fine, but there is a definite line you should not cross.

                Personally, I think it's sort of natural to have some simple/innocent flirtations between the opposite sex. Yes, flirting can lead up to cheating, but that's if the thought to cheat is/was already there or if the person was not strong enough to stop that course from going where it shouldn't. There was someone who did cross that line with me, I put an end to it. Then there is my friend Jason... I have known for YEARS, since I was 11. There's no sexual attraction for either of us, although neither of us believe the other is also NOT attractive. There's just no sexual chemistry, but because we've known each other for years and are completely comfortable around each other - sometimes people will assume we're together. My SO is aware, because I personally find it funny. There's never been anything inappropriate. There has been hugs, playful 'whacks', but that's it. He's my drinking buddy, and I'm often his wing-women for getting other girls. :P

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                  #9
                  I'm a natural flirt. I flirt with everyone. Men, women, straight, gay, bi, asexual, older, younger, everyone. But I make a conscious effort not to since I've been with my SO. I tone it down because I know it would tear me up if I found him flirting with another girl. Sometimes I can't help it, it just happens. If a guy tries to do anything besides talk to me, I quickly shut him down.

                  My verdict: Flirting is okay as long as it means nothing and your SO is okay with it.
                  "We are all a little weird and life's a little weird, and when we find someone whose weirdness is compatible with ours, we join up with them and fall in mutual weirdness and call it love " ~ Theodore Seuss Geisel.

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                    #10
                    There are different sorts of flirting and different levels, and everyone sees them differently. What may be harmless social interaction to one is a blatant "hey you're cute" in someone else's book. As long as the one flirting has no intention of actually attracting this person, regardless of whether or not said person takes it that way, then it's fine. Some people are very friendly in general and it can be read the wrong way.

                    If my guy was to flirt, casually, with another girl I'd have to assume she was either a good friend or a cousin but that's merely because he's about as social as I am, which is near not at all. Now if I saw him touch her in a way that suggested heavier flirting and him "coming on" to her, well I made it clear to him why I carry heavy books in my bag at all times. I don't recommend hitting people, though.

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                      #11
                      My rule of thumb is "if it doesn't feel right, it's probably not." If you feel wrong doing it, or if you feel like you wouldn't want to tell your SO about it, then you miiiiiight want to think twice. Good luck!

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                        #12
                        My so is naturally a really friendly guy which could be mistaken for flirting if I didn't know him better. I think there is a really fine line between friendly and flirting. I also am very friendly. If I am talking to a guy and hes funny I will laugh at his jokes and will engage in conversation, however I won't probably touch him as we make conversation and if he starts asking if I have a boyfriendI will tell him or about any sexual history I won't go there.

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                          #13
                          I used to have big jealousy issues with my boyfriend. He didn't think he was flirting, but when the girl he was talking to got jealous of him spending so much time with me, I assumed he was and got mad about it. Generally he's not the flirty type, and really doesn't show much interest in other girls at all. If he does flirt a little bit I don't think it'll bother me much now, at this stage of our relationship. (:

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                            #14
                            I personally don't have a problem with it - I tease The Boy all the time about his flirtatious nature! I've seen him online and he's just a personable guy. But I also know he wouldn't act on it. But I will admit to having a problem with it in the past, with past relationships.

                            So I am not sure if it's me being more secure in myself, or me being with someone who is trustworthy, or a little of both, but when it comes to The Boy and I, I really don't worry too much.

                            Now I have a guy friend, we've been friends FOREVER, and he stopped talking to me because our flirtatious nature made his girlfriend uncomfortable. She actually posted this on her Facebook page:

                            Flirting is a habit for those who are single, it means "I'm free"; but for those who are committed, it means "I'm bored".

                            I don't think there's a hard and fast rule on this...depends on you, your SO and what you are comfortable with.


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                              #15
                              It's not okay with me, on any level. We've had some issues where Rane is too friendly, and the girls take it wrong. He doesn't mean anything by it, and I'm not worried about things going farther, except in their minds, but it makes me mad. It was worse LD. Now I can go beat some ass if necessary. Or given my current state, simply sit on them.

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