Tears

[Mfashnik]

Erik visited me last week for three days and it was absolutely wonderful. The night before he left we were in bed having a deep conversation when the topic got incredibly serious and he started to cry. It was the first time I had ever seen him get that upset and it was heartbreaking for me to watch. I cry in front of him pretty much every time he visits at some point or another, but this was the first time that he cried. I was so affected by seeing him hurt that much that I couldn't help but cry myself. As sad as it was it was a conversation that I think we both needed to have and it was nice to be comforting each other for once, instead of him just comforting me. Now that we've moved on I can't help but wonder if he feels the same pain seeing me cry as I felt when he cried.

So for you guys, have you ever scene your SO cry or maybe heard them cry over the phone? How does it make you feel? and How do you comfort them?

[Miramaid]

Yes i have seen and heard my SO cry a few times. It breaks my heart. I try to comfort him with words if i am on the phone. Unfortunately a few times he cried during our arguments so he would not let me touch him or comfort him and would just get in his shell.
But yes it is very heartbreaking, but I believe if women start having "mother instincts" when they see a man crying, men react differently and feel like running away and hate it.

[FadedSunrise]

He's said he cried when we broke up for a bit back in January. It didn't hurt that much then because we weren't that close yet, and because I was just through days of sobbing my eyes out myself over the decision.

There's been two more times that he's been upset over the distance, and just kind of goes silent and into his shell. Beforehand, I didn't know each time, but then I see him online, video with him, and when I see that listless unhappy look my heart feels tighter, beats faster and I...pull out every none physical contact trick in the book in a huge attempt to cheer him up.

[Sav88]

My boyfriend told me by text as I was still waiting to get on my plane at Heathrow to come home to Australia that his heart broke and he was on his bed with a box of tissues. I felt my own heart break just knowing he's in his room by himself crying and I'm not there to comfort him. It was so hard. But I have yet to actually see him cry. He's seen me cry a billion times though

[Jonesonaboat]

We thought we closed the distance when I went out there in November but in February some things out of our control happened and I had to come back to the UK. We were both wrecks for about two weeks up until I left. Crying what felt like non stop every day. The day he took me to the airport was the worst. Then when I came back the first couple of weeks little things while we were skyping would set us off. Plus the fact that we were skyping again.

It was very tough to see him like that, but we were both just such a mess that it was different because we were both in the same *ahem* boat if you know what I mean.

We're closing the distance in about 42 days if everything goes to plan. Although it's pretty soon there's a lot of things that need to fall into place first. And it's more on his shoulders than mine. So every so often he does start to crack a little and it's hard when you're just looking at him on a screen. If I could hug him and kiss him it would be so much easier. But sometimes I'm just lost for words as to what I can say to make him feel better.

[NaNi]

I've seen my SO cry. Many times. It's much easier to comfort your partner in person though. You can hug them, hold them, kiss them. I wasn't able to do anything when I heard my SO cry on the phone or when I saw her cry on webcam and video. It made me feel helpless. It also broke my heart and made me cry too.

[LotusWing]

Yes, I have seen him cry. In person and on Skype. It's heartbreaking to see him like that. When I see him crying, I feel like crying with him. When he cried in person, then I hugged him tight and cried with him.
When we're on Skype I comforted him with words. I showed him that I will always be there for him, and he should never feel alone.
But yeah... he has seen me crying a lot for many reasons lol ^^;

[Caitlin2009]

yeah i have breaks my heart to hear on the phone, breaks my heart more when im person and i see her do it, its a struggle for me not to do the same and to be strong while shes doing it lol i usually fail and do it anyway with her

[blankita719]

Yes, I have seen him cry and it tears me up because this is not an overly emotional man, so I know he is hurting when he lets it out. Unfortunately seeing him cry usually makes me cry too so I don't know how much comforting I do, but we will cling to each other and just remind each other how much we love one another. Our last visit we held it together because I had my son and we didn't want him to get upset seeing both of us upset but the visit prior to that one, he cried in the airport with me, which is even more unusual for him to do out in public.

We were friends for a very long time, and I listened to him get upset over a previous relationship ending over the phone...all I could do was listen and it broke my heart to hear it...even though I was in another relationship at the time I wanted to crawl through the phone and just hold him and tell him it would all work out in the end.

[LostInLove]

I've seen my SO cry twice. Once back when we were about to go LD (we were originally CD). He spent the entire night before he left crying and telling me how amazing I am. That was a bit easier, because I just hugged him a lot and told him he was amazing too.

The second time was over this girl who went absolutely psychotic on him and was (and still is off and on) trying to ruin his life. He kept what was happening from me for two weeks because he "didn't want to worry me". That time I just let him talk it out, reassured him how stupid this girl was being and how awesome he was, and saved the issues I had with the situation for when he was a bit calmer.

[TknandLvnIt]

Yes I have he cries when I leave especially after we first admitted we loved each other. Every time gets harder and harder and it almost seems unfair. I appreciate the vulnerability and he has laid his head in my lap and cried too. I love that he is open with me emotionally and just comfort him. He has seen me cry so many times and heard me cry over the phone and I think it breaks his heart every time. He gets upset just thinking that I might be crying and he can't comfort me. He isn't as emotional as I am but we definitely have had our fair share of tears.

[amit2k11]

Its weird to say but at times I find it romantic.Hugging each other and just crying is simply adorable.
Yes,I have seen my SO crying and I let her do it completely till she were back to her senses. But its an OK feeling for me.

[thatstormynight]

My SO doesn't cry, hardly EVER. He's had a lot of traumatic experiences as a child and because of that it has made him kind of cut himself off from the sad/emotional side. However, I have seen him cry twice in the three years we've been together. Once when we were having a deep late night conversation, and we got to talking about his mother who died of cancer when he was 15 (he's only 20 now). The other time was the last visit, when we were at the airport saying goodbye. It was a tough one. We were both crying & hugging each other.
Of course, I cry all the time- which is funny because even my friends and family would describe me as a strong person! I rarely cry too, but something about him just gets me on a deeper level.
And especially seeing him cry, makes me cry too. So we're both just a big mess.
But i have to say, there is something extremely intimate about being open enough to cry together. I honestly think it brought us together even more.

[uniquefem]

I see him crying when we say good bye at airport, not as my 'ugly cry" but i saw a drop of tears from both of his eyes, we hug so tight, and he kept saying please don't cry... huhuhu.. i feel sad to remember that moment... he already walk through the the gate, but running back for me just to hug me even tighter... love him so much knowing that he had that sensitive part... and he also a human behind that Europe cold face (hehehe) he is my Russian Teddy bear!

[thisisme]

My SO has cried only a couple times in front of me, it really pains me when he does. He's such a big tough guy and to see him break down is something different. But I think it brings us closer together, heaven knows I cry almost weekly in front of him for my own petty problems (that's what happens when you're very emotional lol)