Advice on situation. For me!

[Amber]

I need advice on how I can take some skeptical emotions away towards my boyfriend. He recently took his frustrations out on me over the phone because he was stressed about school. I have not called him back since. Just simple texting during the day. No I love you's.

Today he told me that phones work both ways. That I should call him if there is something wrong still. Because he did apologize through voicemail and texting. We have not spoken about what happened voice-to-voice. I can't stop thinking about what happened and for some reason have not picked up the phone to talk to him about it (I know he is busy with studying for finals).

Can anyone please help! I know I love him and I know that we miss each other so much. How do I make this emotional distance between us smaller? How can I make myself pick up that phone and just let it all out. I have trouble telling him how I feel sometimes because I might be embarrassed or I just cry. UGH! How can I get over this situation? Talk to him and laugh together again? The last time we saw each other we made so much progress in our relationship and then this happened and it makes it seem like we took one step forward and two steps back.

[roosie]

As hard as it feels now, I think the only way to get over the situation is to really talk about it. So I think you already answered your question. Be honest and tell him how you feel, as it's the only way to make a real progress. I know I'm sometimes guilty of wishing my SO secretly know what I want or need but he is not a mind reader and neither is your SO so let him know what you want and how you feel.

[Micah]

You aren't going to get emotionally closer if you choose to not call him and distance yourself from him. I think you should just call him and open that line of communication again. From there, hopefully you can build up the emotional connection again. Don't be scared to express how you feel and cry... A relationship is all about communication, especially a long distance one.

[toggle]

After speaking to my SO today after he has finished the semester, I realize how much toll stress can take on somebody. Now that his stress is over, he seems like a different person. He wasn't angry or anything before, but I could see in his eyes that he was just drained and withdrawn. Different people handle stress in different ways. I'm sure things will get better during a less stressful time. I can speak for myself when I say this, because now is a really stressful time for me and it makes my moods swing so bad! I guess my advice would be to try and support and encourage him through this tough time of year. Also, I know it might be hurtful if he takes his frustrations out on you, but try and be more patient and forgiving with him than you would normally.

[kiara_silver]

I had once my Nathan was frustrated and he just said that he was going to go now before he gets upset with me. He was frustrated with his project he was working on with a friend, and was stressed. He chose not to vent and just go off, everyone handles there stresses differently. The next day when we talked i asked how he was feeling and he told me why he had been upset and we moved on. I think you just call him and just be that support, if he needs to vent let him and move on. Call him up and be cheerful, so he knows your always there for him and are able to bring him up when he's feeling down.

[Barbie.Dahl]

I agree with roosie
I know how hard it sometimes is and also struggle with this at times. But if communication is important in any relationship, it's crucial in LDR's since practically all you can do is just talk with each other.
I hope you both resolve this. Good luck

[LostInLove]

Talk with him. If you cry, if you get embarrassed, if you stumble over your words, don't worry about it. Be patient with yourself and get it all out there. He can't fix what's wrong if you don't tell him what it is.

[Summer]

Tough love time: he was stressed about exams, took out his frustrations on you, and then apologized. It's not a big deal!! I'm sure it must be upsetting and I bet your feelings got hurt. If you really love him, and he really loves you, then there will be LOTS more times when one of you will take frustrations out on the other person without intending to. Just gotta dust yourself off, make sure the other person apologizes, and you both try to do better next time. If you really love him, this doesn't need to be a big deal. You can get through this!

[TknandLvnIt]

Just pick up the phone and call. My SO and i had a similar situation a couple of days ago...he had a Horrible day and pulled away from me and said he needed space. I gave it to him but I was hurt and I told him we talked about it via text he explained why he needed the space what that did and didn't mean. But apparently he was texting me later in the day...I never got them and next thing I know we are getting into an argument because I'm being short with him (He asked if I got the texts I said No I didn't and cue argument)...and things got escalated after that for reasons I didn't understand. I tried to explain myself but no matter what I said he was upset. I felt like it had to be about something else...He didn't feel as though he was taking anything out on me but we ended up ending the convo horribly. I text and said I don't wanna fight and called when I was available...as much as I didn't want to he was angry he was grumbly I was emotional but we talked and now things are better. I had to take a lot of deep breathes and be super patient because I knew he was having a rough time...My So apologized via text and then kept arguing with me lol...I said all that to say that in these moments the more rational and least stressed person should make the first move. Good luck.

[BabyGund]

It really depends. I know The Boy is undergoing a very stressful time right now and calling him would not make it better. One thing I've learned about him, when he's stressed he really does crawl into a hole. I will text, letting him know I am here for him. But otherwise, I'll leave him alone.

It's frustrating as all get out. But I know better than to push him; he'll really bite my head off then.

[ClipitsWings]

you should def talk to him again, perhaps warn him in text before calling that you want to talk about it so that he's prepared to hear you admit hurt feelings, and if you have issues dialing at that point, he'll be there to coax you
i would just avoid getting him on a stressful day again, and again, warning him could be beneficial there

good luck

[hanksk]

What the dude and I do is this:

We set a timer for five minutes. One of us goes first. That person can talk and let out all emotion and feelings and say whatever they want for those five minutes. Then the other person goes, and the first person has to sit and listen. We like to take notes while the other person is talking. After we've done the ten minutes, we go back over and talk about things rationally, point by point.

This works really well for us. Getting out the emotional side of things and being able to validate each other allows us to both feel like we are being heard and that we can listen to the other person.

Call him! Notice if you need to take a break and give it to each other. Remember that you are working together on your relationship and you don't have to be butting heads. Good luck!

[we'reunderthesamesky]

We set a timer for five minutes. One of us goes first. That person can talk and let out all emotion and feelings and say whatever they want for those five minutes. Then the other person goes, and the first person has to sit and listen. We like to take notes while the other person is talking. After we've done the ten minutes, we go back over and talk about things rationally, point by point.

I love this idea!

[JEREIANEDREI]

this past few weeks I'm experiencing the feeling of being depressed for my man and I has always havin' issues and argues..i misses him so much,,thats why I'm being too emotional and sensitive of showing my feelings towards him,,maybe thats why he is feelin' annoyed for my drama's..I know and I feel that maybe my man is just havin' some problems...I dont wanna think negatively though it hurts for me as he treated me being ignored....I love my man so much,,and I'm willing to have bad times with him,.rather than to lose him and living a life without him....
...just believe in your LOVE FOR YOUR MAN,,,love him unconditionally....understanding him and making him that you're always been there for him will help....
...by the way thanks for your advices to me we'reunderthesamesky...I do appreciated them and it inspires me!...
God bless us all...and always bear in your mind that God is always with us!.....

[JEREIANEDREI]

this past few weeks I'm experiencing the feeling of being depressed for my man and I has always havin' issues and argues..i misses him so much,,thats why I'm being too emotional and sensitive of showing my feelings towards him,,maybe thats why he is feelin' annoyed for my drama's..I know and I feel that maybe my man is just havin' some problems...I dont wanna think negatively though it hurts for me as he treated me being ignored....I love my man so much,,and I'm willing to have bad times with him,.rather than to lose him and living a life without him....
...just believe in your LOVE FOR YOUR MAN,,,love him unconditionally....understanding him and making him feel that you're always been there for him will help....
...by the way thanks for your advices to me we'reunderthesamesky...I do appreciated them and it inspires me!...
God bless us all...and always bear in your mind that God is always with us!.....