should I really do this??

[JEREIANEDREI]

yap,yes,abosolutely....If you really LOVE EACH OTHER I could say that there is no reason not to tie a knot...
I dont believe in long term bf and gf term....as long as you feel to bind together as one...there is no reason not to get married yet....THAT'S THE BEST DECISION THAT YOU WILL MAKE.....
a simple yet solemn CEREMONY will do,,WHAT MATTERS MOST IS YOUR LOVED ONES ARE THERE....
or if not you're right THE ACTUAL WEDDING CAN WAIT....
ACTUALLY WE HAVE THE SAME PLAN,,as soon as my visa is done(God's will soon)...we will just have a civil wedding...
then after a few years as we go back here in pi..then we will be having a CHURCH WEDDING.....

GOOD LUCK AND GOD BLESS...BEST WISHES IN ADVANCE!....Follow what your heart says...

[lshay]

This is strictly my opinion but it comes from life experience and a good hindsight of 20/20.

My intention is not to destroy anything there, I would suggest waiting to get married.

I know it has been said before but it really is so true.
If you love each other and it is meant to be, etc....that same love, dedication and committment will be there when he gets back.

He himself is going to be thrust into a new world full of new surroundings, rules, lifestyle and people. He's going to face a huge amount of adjustment and yes, temptation as well.
This is going to be a time of vast discovery about himself. He won't come back the same person as the guy you know now. Not saying he will come back worse, etc but just
different as he will grow while he is away. This growth period needs room and freedom, and the confines of marriage are hard during deployment even for the most
committed and long standing couples, a newer couple makes it even harder.

I would rather allow him to go through this time and keep or relationship status as is until he gets back and we make sure we are still on the same page, than get married now because you love each other NOW and it feels great,
and have BOTH of you go through changes and growth while he is gone and realize it isn't going to work out.

We all know statistically speaking, how many military marriages end in divorce due to affairs, etc especially during deployment time. Why not give yourselves an even better chance at it by waiting and continuing to love and learn
about each other until you can be together for a longer period of time. Marriage is easy....a SUCCESSFUL and LOVING marriage is WORK!!! Every single day for the rest of your life.

Age aside, it's a hard world out there and relationships are tough I know. My SO lives in Rio and being 4700 miles away is horrible! And to also think that the only way for us to truly be together is marriage due to visas.
But I would not do this just for this reason alone. I married at 21 and it's not something to take lightly. You change so much in your 20's, your wants, your likes, your desires for your life. We need time and space to grow as a person.
I'm in my 30's now and it's amazing how much we do grow.

So while I completely support love and all it has done for you, I would love for you to really take my thoughts into consideration as they are not meant to be negative in any way.
Love is a powerful force. And it can also span time and distance...and that is what I would suggest you do for now. Let it continue to grow between you and make any important decisions that will impact the rest of your life when
he gets back.

Thank you for allowing me to comment.

[Mizpah]

I can't see any reason why you shouldn't You love him, he loves you, the important people in your life are supportive, and the military would be supportive and it would provide you with more benefits (not just the health, housing, and spousal privilege). Aaron and I would have been married much sooner had we not originally been planning a wedding, and we got married about ten and a half months after we met. Time really has nothing to do with these things

[rivi87]

Let me say I thank everyone of you for your opinions. I appreciate every one of them. I looked into it today to see what I'd have to do and its alot easier than I thought.

Me and Mitch talked about it a lil last nigh (he's at training so havent been able to talk much ). We decided that we want to make this happen either in two weeks or when he's back on leave..sometime within the next year I guess just not sure when!

I have thought long and hard about it weighing pros and cons. Such as He's not that close with his family and he wont have to worry about bills and other expenses. with the money we would get as dual military it would be a great base for our life together..on top of that, If I come down on orders then I will have an easier chance getting closer to him.

Again thanks for all the advice..you have all given me alot to think about...feel free to keep posting