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    Heart vs Head :(

    Ok i'll try and make this as short as i can, I met a girl online from chile (shes 18 years old) and im 20 years old from the uk. We had a long distance relationship for over 16 months..things went wrong when she stoped beliving it could work. We broke up late july of last year. It took about untill mid september for us to be talking again, ever since the attraction has been building up again slowely, but its never quite left the same.

    February 2011 came and she left me an offline on msn saying 'Plss marry me, i miss you so much, i need you right now, i want you to be with me, i wish you still love me' So the day after i told her how i felt (the same way) But then things still didnt seem the same..
    But she starting saying 'i love you' everytime we would talk
    And then last sunday her relationship status on facebook changes, i asked her and it turns out its her new boyfriend, i was quite upset

    The reason why things have not felt the same is because of these inner conflicts that are happening inside of her..Her head is saying 'it will never work' and her heart still wants me deep down. shes always been saying stuff like 'i wish we could do that together' and stuff. I really need everyones opinion, whats the next move? i really dont know what to do

    #2
    It sounds like she's playing you. You deserve so much better than that. If I were you, I'd cut all ties and forget about her.

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      #3
      If she has a guy, there's not much you can do even if she's just using the guy to try and get over you. It's fine and dandy to say "I love you" or "Please marry me" but unless your actions back up those words, they mean nothing. Love cannot sustain and support the entire relationship, it is not a miracle cure for everything once it's said or felt. You two can love each other until you drop dead but unless you both work to maintain a relationship that will keep you happy, you're basically wasting your time, breath, and feelings. She needs to learn that even if it doesn't work out in the end, as long as she finds the risk worth it there's nothing to fear.

      But again I say if she's with some other guy you can't do anything no matter what she tells you. And if this guy is made up just to get you riled up, personally I'd drop her like a hot potato because nobody needs head games like that. She already is screwing your head up by flip-flopping between what she wants to do and if she actually wants to be with you, something like that would just be the straw breaking the camel's back.

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        #4
        Originally posted by WakeUpSusie View Post
        It sounds like she's playing you. You deserve so much better than that. If I were you, I'd cut all ties and forget about her.
        My sentiments in fewer words.

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          #5
          What's there to decide? She got herself a new boyfriend. I would be pretty hurt.

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            #6
            Really does sound like she's playing with you, if she truly loved you she wouldn't be with anybody else. Cuts the ties and move on, it'll hurt like hell but waiting and being strung along will hurt 10 times more.
            As long as there is air in my lungs... there is a chance

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              #7
              thank you everyone for ur responses, shes been nothing but confusing and leading me on all this time, i think u guys are right

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                #8
                It seems to me that she just wanted to be with the first person she could physically interact with.

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                  #9
                  Sweetie, there's no decision to be made here, she's totally playing you, and that's not going to change. As much as it'll hurt, it really is in your best interest to cut her off completely, block her from everything, and don't even give her the courtesy of an explanation (because she'll only use it to try talking you out of it). When a woman has any feelings at all for a man, she will not behave like that, no matter what. I'm sorry you have to go through this, but trust me, you'll be so much better off this way.
                  Our separation of each other is an optical illusion of consciousness. ~Albert Einstein

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                    #10
                    Originally posted by Kristie View Post
                    It seems to me that she just wanted to be with the first person she could physically interact with.
                    exactly what im thinking!

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                      #11
                      I agree with everyone else. You have to cut it off with her. She's just stringing you along, and you're the one who's ultimately going to be hurt the most. If she really cares about you the way she says she does, she'll find a way to be with you even once you cut ties.
                      "I'll hold you in my heart till I can hold you in my arms again."


                      "It's supposed to be hard! If it wasn't hard, everyone would do it. The hard...is what makes it great! -A League of Their Own

                      Met: August 22, 2010
                      Made it official: September 17, 2010
                      Got engaged: January 15, 2012
                      Our First Visit: November 18, 2010-November 28, 2010
                      Our Seventh (and Last) Visit: November 10, 2012-November 24, 2012
                      Got married: November 21, 2012
                      Big Wedding Date: May 25, 2013
                      Closed the Distance: June 2, 2013

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                        #12
                        Now, i agree with the fact that you need to let go . no point in hanging around waiting for her . her loss .
                        but i think its more of her not being mature enough , strong enough , or just not loving you enough to handle the distance/ deal with.
                        i dont believe shes just being a bitch and wants to hurt you .

                        she cant handle a long distance relationship and you deserve someone who will love you through the distance.

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                          #13
                          Well, it might be that she's just not mature/strong/loving enough to handle a LDR or it might be that she's just playing you for a fool. Be as that may, those are just some reason as for why she behaves the way she does.

                          What I definitely agree with all the others and what should be on your to-do list: Get away from her ASAP even if it hurts! It's better for you and her, too, in the end....

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                            #14
                            Well maybe its of bit of all those things, maybe shes just not mature enough for me anyways. its a shame the distance effected the rest of what we had to, it had an impact on everything really >.<

                            A few weeks before i got a signed autograph from this famous tv star that lives in my town for her, i sent it with a letter telling that i love her and stuff..i wish i didnt now. but im expecting her to contact me sometime, what should i do? and when people say 'cut it off with her' does this mean feelings & contact right?

                            Comment


                              #15
                              She probably just wants attention from you when theres nobody she can have physically. Let her go, if she cared about you seriously she wouldn't be messing around with someone else. distance or no distance

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