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    #16
    Originally posted by princessmeg1328 View Post
    I don't think you should say anything either. He gave his opinion of what his body looks likes and it's his perception. Unless this affects the way you feel about him, you should just let things keep progressing the way they have been. Sometimes even when they aren't exactly what you thought you wanted, they are exactly who you need.
    i agree with her....maybe its different with my SO coz we started as CD,,before he left me..and we seen each other at first how we exactly look liked,.my SO is a quite a little chubby but he's handsome and tall,.I love him and I like the way he is,,.as I always keep on telling him...no matter how he looks,,he will always be my Baby,,and my one and only Love....

    we'll its good to know that what you sees dont changed your feelings towards him,,maybe its just your mind who was surprised,,but not what your heart feels...as a suggestion as what they've said just keep it on you,,and later on as you talked and still it bothers you,,mentioned it to him but in a nice way,,i mean be honest but make sure that it wont hurt his feelings...anyway Goodluck and God Bless!...
    dianelovesjeremy

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      #17
      It sounds like you've got it figured out. I can see why you had a different image of him, to me "toned" does not include flab. But I can't imagine a guy telling a girl he likes that his body is "kinda flabby", so I could see why he'd try and find something different to say. Who knows, maybe he was thinking of trying to lose the flab anyways and thought he could do it before you noticed. There's a million and one reasons why he would mislead you.

      It sounds horrible, but most people prefer their partners to have good bodies. It may not be necessary (it isn't in my case), but the preference is still there. I was certainly a bit surprised the first time I saw my SO shirtless, somehow I'd come to the assumption that he was fairly built. That said, I'm perfectly okay with my SO having a bit of squish. A bit of squish is awesome for cuddling. And he's still damn sexy to me . I'm being rambly tonight, but I'm just trying to say I understand your initial reaction, but your initial reaction does not necessarily indicate how you really feel about the subject. I agree with taking a few days to get over it before thinking about saying something. You already said you were doing that. I guess this post's kind of pointles....

      Oh well. Hope it was helpful at least.


      "You know it's love when you want to keep holding hands even after you're sweaty."
      -- Anonymous

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        #18
        It sounds like you've already figured out what to do Like everyone else, I agree that if it isn't a big deal then don't bring it up. However, if you do feel a bit bothered by it and it'd make you feel better to tell him then I would suggest bringing it up in a light-hearted/joking way BUT, only once you two have had some time to get comfortable with each other. As in, when you both know for a fact that neither of you cares what the other looks like

        You could also bring it up when you meet and are snuggling together later ("hey, you know that time back when you told me.......")
        Cuddling while you say it also (partially) takes care of the insecurities he might have because hey, it's obvious you don't care what he looks like if you're there!

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          #19
          you shouldnt say anything , itll probably just hurt his feelings.
          buuuuut, you need to find your partner physically attractive .

          and im not saying not everyone is attractive . or anyones ugly.
          just different people find different aspects attractive .
          and if thats something your juust not into. then i think it'll strain your relationship, or at least when its gets too or if its on a serious level.

          buut if you love this guy . you'll be attracted once your not in shock ha(:
          give it some time.

          you'll figure it out(:

          and your not a bad person at all.
          it doesnt make you shallow at all,

          physical attraction is just part of any relationship (:

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            #20
            I wouldn't mention it. He probably knows how he looks and was wanting you to like him reguardless of how he looks.

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              #21
              I say if his size/shape hasn't changed the way you feel about him-- great! But if you now don't want to be with him, I understand that too. I actually met a guy online way back before there was skype, etc. So I didn't know what he looked like for a looonnngg time. When I finally saw a picture of him he was not only completely different then how he was describing himself, he was so unattractive I didn't even want to look at him. You can't be in love with someone you're not attracted to. I don't care how vain that sounds, it's the truth.

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