Sorry my other post was kind of long
But that other stuff happened.
Anyway I ended up telling him that if august wasn't good, he should just give me a date he an stick to next year and I'll book a flight. I guess that sent him into panic mode and he started texting me repeatedly even when I was in class and when I got home he called me begging me to come in August which before he said was a bad time but not its okay because he desperate because he thinks I'll break up with him. (I dont want to repost the same things over)
But we were on the phone for like 3 hours the beginning was him pleading with me to come in August after he said no and stressed me out then he jumped ship and started talkinig about how fat he thought he was then he asked me how much I weighed and I didnt want to tell him and he just started pesturing me about but the whole time saying it doesnt matter then he got upset because I "couldn't trust him enough to confide things like that in him." I thought the whole thing was stupid but he just kept pesturing me and it just stressed me out to the point I didnt want to talk to him at all. Then he asked for more pictures of me and I just sent him some earlier this week (the bad kind) and I told him I hate taking any kind of pictures because Im self conscious of the way I look but I have in the past because he said it would make him happy. I told him I didnt want to and he just kept pesturing me saying he doesn't understand how big of deal it is that I cant send pictures to the person I love and the ones that I have sent are not full on or something and I was just really tired of talking to him and he just finally dropped it after I told him it didnt seem like he was respecting my feelings. I just dont see why he can't understand because it took him forever to send me a picture and he's still reluctant unless he wants to send me his man parts which I dont really need to see. Probably the last hour was less strained and we laughed a little bit but I still dont know how I feel about this whole thing. I dont know what Im suppose to be feeling and right now Im just feeling like this isnt going to work. I know I love him and he constantly tells me how much he loves me and wants us to be happy together ... but I dont know. I dont feel as confident as I did before.
But that other stuff happened.
Anyway I ended up telling him that if august wasn't good, he should just give me a date he an stick to next year and I'll book a flight. I guess that sent him into panic mode and he started texting me repeatedly even when I was in class and when I got home he called me begging me to come in August which before he said was a bad time but not its okay because he desperate because he thinks I'll break up with him. (I dont want to repost the same things over)
But we were on the phone for like 3 hours the beginning was him pleading with me to come in August after he said no and stressed me out then he jumped ship and started talkinig about how fat he thought he was then he asked me how much I weighed and I didnt want to tell him and he just started pesturing me about but the whole time saying it doesnt matter then he got upset because I "couldn't trust him enough to confide things like that in him." I thought the whole thing was stupid but he just kept pesturing me and it just stressed me out to the point I didnt want to talk to him at all. Then he asked for more pictures of me and I just sent him some earlier this week (the bad kind) and I told him I hate taking any kind of pictures because Im self conscious of the way I look but I have in the past because he said it would make him happy. I told him I didnt want to and he just kept pesturing me saying he doesn't understand how big of deal it is that I cant send pictures to the person I love and the ones that I have sent are not full on or something and I was just really tired of talking to him and he just finally dropped it after I told him it didnt seem like he was respecting my feelings. I just dont see why he can't understand because it took him forever to send me a picture and he's still reluctant unless he wants to send me his man parts which I dont really need to see. Probably the last hour was less strained and we laughed a little bit but I still dont know how I feel about this whole thing. I dont know what Im suppose to be feeling and right now Im just feeling like this isnt going to work. I know I love him and he constantly tells me how much he loves me and wants us to be happy together ... but I dont know. I dont feel as confident as I did before.
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