Family Approval?

[mouse411]

Personally, I do care about what my mother thinks about my relationships, mainly because she's never been wrong about past boyfriends. I would care if my brother didn't like my boyfriend. But as far as my stepdad, sister, and father go, I don't really care what they think. They don't have a big part of my life, so I wouldn't reconsider a relationship if they voiced concerns about it.
I don't think my parents care that I'm in a LDR, they've never mentioned that they think it's bad or anything, but I do think that they don't understand it. Like when my boyfriend comes to visit, and then he leaves afterwards, I get really sad. My mom will say something like "Why are you so sad? Do you think you guys are moving a little fast?". I don't think she understands how well you can get to know a person even when they're not physically present. That part kind of frustrates me.

On his side, his parents loved me and I think that they're much more understanding of the LDR because my SO is in the military. They're used to him being away, and I think that since their relationship with him over the past few years has been over long distances, they find an LDR to be more normal. They never seemed to question it, and I think they even expect him to move to where I am. They don't seem bothered by that at all.

[Rach]

My parents and friends love him more than they love me haha

[mickey's bird]

When I was visiting my SO, I met my mom for brunch (they both live in the UK) and wanted to arrange a meeting. I've never been in a serious relationship so this was the first time I told my mom about a guy. Anyway, my mom was very open to meeting my SO because he was a different race. She was more concerned about that the the fact that he's 17 years older than me. We got into a big argument about it and she knows that it's my life and I'm going to do what makes me happy. She's come around and is looking forward to meeting him the next time I'm there. My cousin (and person I'm closest to after my SO) loved him from the beginning because he makes me happy. Then when she went to England, she met up with him and loved him even more.

[Sunbeam]

My grandparents (whom I live with) used to approve, until my boy and I met.. now they hate it cause they realize that it is actually more than "internet dating."
My brother... absolutely adores my SO. I bought my brother a tiny stuffed sheep from Wales, when I went (cause my brother always makes sheep jokes about Wales), and seeing as to how my SO is Welsh, my brother named the sheep after him.
My mom basically told me if it was love, to follow it no matter the cost. My mom was in an LDR 2 years ago, and she moved 2.5 hours away to be with him. I hated her for it for a while, since because of school, I couldn't go with her, but I understand so much more now.

[Hilary]

I have a bit of an odd relationship with my family. :S We're opposites, and I've never felt they accept me for who I am, so there opinion is worthless to me.

When my SO and I started our relationship my mother was full of unwanted opinions and comments. She even said that my SO was probably a serial killer. (Apparently those are the only people online)

[sarinalilac]

My parents approved when my SO and I first started but somehow they missed that we were romantically interested and my mom eventually got really mad and my dad was for a little while but he told me later that he thinks having people I love in my life is the most important thing for me. So he accepts the fact that with their blessing or not I will be with him someday. Now it's just a few months til we're both eighteen and I can go see him. I hate to think how it will affect my family but I keep telling myself that this is my life and he is important to me.

[Soyokaze]

The problem with family approval isn't actually from my end. My mom likes him, even let him spend three weeks visiting me and staying in our house (even in my bed!). My dad, my brother, and my friends all liked him too. Unfortunately, he didn't give the best description of me to his family. When asked he apparently described me as an athiest and politically liberal to his conservative christian family. Needless to say they aren't fond of me in advance and he says their opinions are important to him. I'll have a lot of recovery work to do once I can go down and see him and meet his family.

[kteire]

My mum has met my SO a few times (once when he was over in November, and several times when he was here in July) and after meeting him, and well really, after knowing that he was willing to pay a lot of money to come see me, she's been fully supportive. She was a bit iffy when I first moved back from Ireland, I dunno if she was concerned that maybe a lot of it was one-sided, but now she adores Loic and is happy for us Both of my sisters have met him now and they both loved him, as did all of my extended family that he met.
My family is pretty open minded, which I'm very thankful for. I was a bit worried when I told my mum that my plans had changed from going back to school to going to the UK for two years to be with Loic, but she was fantastic about it, and told me that she knows it must be really hard for me to be away from him. And my aunts and uncles and grandma have all been like, go for it, you're only young once! Bah, I do love my family

[kiara_silver]

My family accepts us now. At first they didn't like the fact that it was a LDR and if i followed there wishes in the beginning me and my SO wouldn't be together right now. But as time goes on and now that they have met him they are more accepting and most of my family loves him now. The rest tolerate it. As far as his side im not exactly sure. They know about me and have offered to let me stay with them, but im not sure if thats a opinion on me or just because they love there son. I have yet to meet them. So I think for us it helps if they are supportive but in the end we were and are going to just follow our own hearts.

[dutchgirl]

I am with my bf for more than year now and his parents are thinking that I am just a friend and not his gf! Because he is afraid they won't accept it. I want to go back to him in December but I told him to tell his parents that I come back as his gf. I want to book the flight in October so he has some time to think about it I really don't want to come back as a "friend".
All the times when I was there we couldn't walk hand in hand because he has a lot of family who could see us.
He is 28, I am 29 and I think his parents have to know that he has a (foreign) gf!

[HollzHeartsChris]

Neither my family or my SO's family would be able to accept the fact that we're in an LDR. It's so hard not having family support They just don't understand what it's like. My family would say I'm just being stupid and wasting time. For the time being, it's best that things are kept under wraps, even though I would really love to tell my parents how much my SO means to me...

[xnavylovex118]

We were together 3 years before we married and became long distance thanks to the Navy. As for support, both our families have mixed feelings.
My mother is beyond supportive of us, but is always trying to tell us how to live when we close the distance again. My dad on the other hand would rather pretend that we never got married, and really doesn't say much about it beyond that he doesn't approve and "wanted better for me." I tend to just nod my head and change the subject.
His parents on the other hand are out of the picture. They did nothing but try to talk him out of marrying me and went as far as to say that the day he left for basic I would use him for his money and cheat on him every time he's gone. Which to say was a mistake on their part is an understatement. I had a brother who was cheated on when he was serving in Afghanistan. I would jump off a bridge before I would ever do that to anyone, let alone my husband. And he knows that, he tells me everyday that he couldn't have been blessed more in his life because he has me for a wife.
As for our friends and relatives, they really don't say much to us about the relationship. They just try to shove their views on college and kids.
Both of us just live our lives how we want though. We know each other well enough to know what we want and when we're ready for anything, and that's how it goes. :]

[Tobby]

My parents aren't very great at supporting me through this as well. . I think its just because of the fact that i'm a bit too young to be put in an LDR. They don't take me seriously, yet they want me to act like an adult, how can if they still treat me like a kid? I remembered the last day i spent in Bicol, I hadn't told my mom about my relationship yet but she found out through a few people. She teased me on the car ride going to the airport, I just shrugged it off and pretended like i didn't care. I think my mom knew i was SERIOUS when we were boarding on our airplane and i started sobbing like crazy. I think she's starting to care a little bit more, but she's not great at showing it. she does things behind the scenes rather than have a conversation face to face.

Even up to this day i still drop small subtle hints that i really miss my SO, whenever my moms around, I'd take out my phone and look at our pictures. drag my feet around, eat my dinner alone. Hoping she takes me and my SO's relationship seriously. I mean maybe you can drop small hints every now and then, see if they change their views a little bit? thats my plan for now. even if my mom's not around i still do all these things haha. . . little to none family support kinda hurts a bit in my opinion, but in the end, your the one thats still in love and still in charge of your life, you know what you feel and no one else does. I guess its just an additional obstacle some people face in LDR's, but still easy peasy because we LOVE our SO that much, we shouldn't let other people get in our way. I like to think the people I've met and the overall forums is my main support system. and its a great one at it too.