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    Differences between you and your SO

    How do you handle the differences (big or small) between you and your SO?

    Sometimes ours are so visible... I'm a really curious person and quite open about the things going on in my life, whereas she keeps all her worries to herself. This sometimes creates us some tiny communication problems when I'd like to know how is she (she's having some issues with job) and she won't tell me. And eg I know nothing much about her siblings, and when I try to ask her about it she just laughs it off and says it's a boring subject. No, it's not for a person who is overly curious about everything. I'm always trying to be as gentle as possible without pressuring her when I ask her something and I always drop it, but this is the main thing that makes me frustrated.

    We've also got completely different tastes in such things as food, music, movies, literature... We're from different cultures, religions and countries. She's a smoker, I'm not. She eats and sleeps badly wheareas I find healthier lifestyle habits quite important. She's very laid back and I constantly stress over everything. I like schedules and planning, she doesn't. I have a really specific memory, and she forgets everything she's told. Then there's age difference and her hard-to-understand Glaswegian accent: needless to say I have to ask her to repeat quite a many times. Sometimes I feel like we are from completely different planets - it's as if we are different in every possible way! The only differences that I really find a bit tricky are those in our personalities and the ways we have been raised in our cultures, because small things like what to eat or which movie to watch are much easier to figure out.

    Yet she's the best thing happened to me during the year we've known.

    So now I'm curious - do you have any differences with your SO and how do you usually make those things work? Do they ever make you frustrated?
    "Everyone smiles in the same language."

    #2
    My SO and I are vastly different as well. OP, I'm more like you. I'm a constant worrier who likes to plan things out. My SO is like yours, he's very laid back and doesn't plan anything out. Sometimes It makes me CRAZY. It makes me anxious if things aren't planned out. I love to read and he'd rather watch TV ( although I've been buying him books and letting him borrow books of stuff he's interested in and he's been reading more!!!). I'm a nerd, and he's more of a jock. My family is very very important to me and to him, they aren't.

    But we do have the same sense of humor, the same adventurousness, and we love each other. Our differences allow us to grow with each other and teach each other.
    "We are all a little weird and life's a little weird, and when we find someone whose weirdness is compatible with ours, we join up with them and fall in mutual weirdness and call it love " ~ Theodore Seuss Geisel.

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      #3
      My SO often jokes with me about the fact that we're so alike, and sometimes calls me his twin. Slightly weird perhaps lol. It's just such a strange thing that we're practically identical in every way. I find it to be one of the best things about us, and it's probably why we're so compatible and why we instantly clicked when we first met. I also love it, how we compliment each other. The only thing I can think of that we disagree on is how much we like/hate Call of Duty: Black Ops

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        #4
        I think our differences are wonderful. While sometimes they cause problems and arguements, they help us grow in our understanding of each other and in our appreciation for each other. Patience is definitely the key in recognizing where you and your SO are different.

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          #5
          lol we have alot of differences too. Our tastes in clothes, food, and music are almost opposite. Im more family oriented as far as i still check in with my family with everything and am always attending family events. Partly fault to that is i have alot more relatives and nearby me, then he does. He's alot more... knowledgeable lol like I don't know what's going on half the time... He's alot more confident then i am. But somehow we fit well together, i still say he's my other half. lol differences or not, we work
          I love you Nathan <3
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          5/25/09 <3

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            #6
            I've always said he's like the younger, male version of me, even during the time of our friendship. :P We do still have our differences though. For example, he's more into computers, programming, gaming, etc. than I am, and I love reading and writing whereas he doesn't do more than technical writing. Oddly enough, with the technical writing that he does, he's a musician and something of an artist. I, on the other hand, am a mathematician and much, much less abstract. He's optimistic in ways I'm a pessimist and I'm optimistic in ways he's a cynic. We do a lot of balancing each other out, with our differences. I would say the one thing for which we are complete polar opposites is our tastes... If he likes something, I'm guaranteed to hate it, and vice versa; we often joke about how we're going to need to keep two separate cupboards and prepare everything in twos.
            { Our Story on LFAD }


            Our Beginning
            Met online: February 2009
            Feelings confessed: December 2010
            Unofficially together since: January/February 2011
            Officially together since: 08 April 2011

            Our Story
            First meeting in person: 16 August - 14 September 2011
            Second visit: 17 March - 01 April 2012
            Third visit: 23 July - 13 September 2012
            Fourth visit: Looking at 23 March - 6 April 2013

            Our Happily Ever After
            to be continued...

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              #7
              We're similar in things we enjoy such as music, movies, tv shows, art, etc. and we have the same viewpoints on many things regarding life. We have the same views on religion and politics, too. However, our differences are more in how we handle things: I'm a saver, NOT a spender. He spends as soon as the money is in his hands. He likes to go all out, I like to do things cheap (but this makes things fun when he goes all out for me - I'm not used to it so it's a big treat for me). He has communication issues, BAD, and I like to talk things out and lay things out on the table, right away (this is our biggest issue, yet, but it's something we'll just have to work on). When it comes down to it, compatibility is just whether or not you want to make it work, try to make it work, and are happy together! ^.^ Differences can be a beautiful thing, because it helps people learn from each other - or, if they don't learn from each other, one person can pick up where the other slacks off (lol - like in the case of me saving money and my SO spending it).

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                #8
                I'm German. Which means that I'm always on time. ALWAYS. Most of the time I'm even early. My SO on the other hand is not. She's a Kiwi and they don't take "being on time" very seriously. My SO is also much slower than I am. For example when we're getting ready. I'm already sitting in the car while she rushes around the apartment. So annoying! She's also a huge nerd, loves science and prefers chick flicks. I hate studying and love horror movies. We have quite a few differences, but none of which that are really bad. Except that she's so slow.

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                  #9
                  I think we're just different enough to keep things interesting in the relationship. Our culture and languages are different but that makes things more exciting.

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                    #10
                    He makes the mess; I clean it up. Sometimes we argue because of it, other times we just break out in song.

                    Yeah... no, seriously, we're always singing together. We have a road trip coming up and I can't wait for the extended singalong.

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                      #11
                      Originally posted by NaNi View Post
                      I'm German. Which means that I'm always on time. ALWAYS. Most of the time I'm even early. My SO on the other hand is not. She's a Kiwi and they don't take "being on time" very seriously. My SO is also much slower than I am. For example when we're getting ready. I'm already sitting in the car while she rushes around the apartment. So annoying! She's also a huge nerd, loves science and prefers chick flicks. I hate studying and love horror movies. We have quite a few differences, but none of which that are really bad. Except that she's so slow.
                      Haha! My SO (he's South-African) and his fellow contrymen are the same when it comes to time - very laid-back and you can count on them being ALWAYS late! Me on the other hand am like you, being punctual and conscious of the fact that you are being respectful towards your acquaintance when you're on time. I'm the one who has to remember to not be angry about the fact that my SO is late because South Africans simply don't think in those terms as they were't raised that way.
                      Other differences: He's very religious, I'm not. (And that's an issue with me, but we're going to work on it.) I'm a reader, he's not so much into books. I'm sure there are many other differences I'm not yet aware of and finding them out step by step.

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                        #12
                        We hardly like any of the same food, but for the stuff we DO like we have a huge passion for it and sharing it with each other.
                        I'm more of an alternative/artsy kind of girl where as he's all about hip-hop and pop culture and all that stuff. He hates my music, which I'm okay with because I like his. Actually our taste in all media is a huge difference, I tell him that I like GOOD movies, and he likes BAD ones but he says theA same to me.
                        He's a lot less outgoing than I am. I'm definitely more carefree and laid back, where as he is a lot more afraid to try new things and have an open mind about things.

                        When we first met eachother and started going out, we used to say that we had nothing in common, but the more we get to know eachother the more we find out how similar we are.

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                          #13
                          I think we're pretty similar.
                          There are some differences... I'm really messy (I can't help it) and my boyfriend likes things to be neat. He tidied up my whole room on his last visit.
                          Ohh, he needs a lot more sleep than me. And it's really annoying that he's asleep or at least tired all the time, when I know for sure he slept more than me during the night.

                          Być tam, zawsze tam, gdzie Ty.

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                            #14
                            Oh god, we´re complete opposites, yet completely the same. It´s actually quite hilarious.

                            He´s SERIOUSLY into cars and movies. I´m Seriously into music and baseball. So when he goes "OMG! Look! It´s a *insert fancy car name here*" or I go "Hear this song, it´s by the same band that does *insert song that I think is reasonably popular*) and we give each other blank stares... lol.

                            Oh, and although we both like motorcycles, he´s into sports bikes and I´m into more dirty bikes. I think our only shouting match ever went along the lines of "GOD, Ducati´s are disgusting! You have no class, it´s all about Harleys!!!"

                            Also, he needs 10 hours of sleep a night to be able to function at all, and I can manage on 3.

                            "In order to attain the impossible, one must attempt the absurd."
                            -Miguel De Cervantes

                            Read our story HERE
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                              #15
                              Our biggest difference is that he's ridiculously optimistic and I'm what I like to call a "realist".

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