Cultural Differences?

[milaya]

I also find that gender roles in relationships are quit important. Itīs totally normal for a woman to stay at home and cook and clean and stuff, and for the man to be the breadwinner. Also, men always open doors for your, pay for meals, etc... Iīve had to fight Miguel to pay sometimes :P And he wonīt let me walk on the side of the sidewalk with cars...

it's exactly the same for my SO and I. The sidewalk thing as well. I've given up trying to pay things though. XD. Also in Japan a lot women become housewives when they marry. Then when the husband receive his paycheck, he gives it to the wife and she controls all the money XD even gives the husband allowance. But, my SO and I wont use this system.

[MadMolly]

He is from Bangladesh and lives in Canada... I guess I will find out the cultural differences more when we meet! :P

[mllebamako]

There are too many to count!! But here are a few:

- Malians are really superstitious, so I've learned all sorts of things like that owls are evil, you shouldn't be in the rain with a new boyfriend/girlfriend, it's not good to ask someone about their pregnancy, if a lizard runs over your foot...you'll be pregnant within a year, etc.

- They eat rice or toh (pounded millet) for almost every meal. He jokes that I deprive him of his culture because I'm usually the one cooking and I'm always making pasta instead!

- Malians avoid arguing or talking back. So if someone is yelling at you or talking harshly to you, you avoid eye contact at all costs and just agree with what they say until it's over.

- Malians often identify people by skin color, which I think we actively try to avoid in the US for fear of looking racist. So people are always calling me Toubabou (white girl) which gets old pretty quick but they also do it to each other (ie. Light skinned girl, dark skinned boy, etc).

- Greetings are hugely important so you have to say good morning/afternoon/evening and then ask how the whole family is doing, how are the kids, how's your mom, your dad, your brother, your wife, etc, etc. And even if you don't have a wife/husband/kids, you still answer "There are no problems" for each one.

Okay, that's all for now. I could go on and on and on...

[lucybelle]

- Malians often identify people by skin color, which I think we actively try to avoid in the US for fear of looking racist. So people are always calling me Toubabou (white girl) which gets old pretty quick but they also do it to each other (ie. Light skinned girl, dark skinned boy, etc).

Same in CR. Calling people by their skin color is often a term of endearment. For example, my SO calls me "machita" (little white girl) all the time. If people want my attention on the street I get "OYE MACHA!" ("HEY WHITE GIRL!") My roommate from 3 years ago was constantly called "negrita" (little black girl). Plus people call each other gordo/gorda (fatty) all the time too. It's all to show love!

[CaptainKaz]

I absolutely love all of the differences you guys in the States are coming across with your British SOs - especially the word fanny, Minerva. My SO still gets a kick out of that particular difference in meaning. I also am boggled by the size of the States - my SO drives to parts of Pennsylvania for holidays and he just waves off a 6 hour drive like it's a trip to the local supermarket!

And floppy bacon is better than crispy bacon, damnit! Although I agree that shops closing early is a bugger, especially on a Sunday. It hits 5pm and it's like the world ended.

[mllebamako]

Same in CR. Calling people by their skin color is often a term of endearment. For example, my SO calls me "machita" (little white girl) all the time. If people want my attention on the street I get "OYE MACHA!" ("HEY WHITE GIRL!") My roommate from 3 years ago was constantly called "negrita" (little black girl). Plus people call each other gordo/gorda (fatty) all the time too. It's all to show love!

Glad it's not just in West Africa!! Malians also comment on your weight (and booty size) all the time! But I have such a healthier relationship with food/my body since living there!

[Minerva]

Ah yes, the driving thing! Last year I had a vacation in the UK with my mom and son (they were with me for two weeks, and I stayed on an additional 2 weeks). In two weeks, I drove from Edinburgh to North Yorkshire to London to the West country to Cardiff. Then on their last day there, I drove from Cardiff to Heathrow to drop them off for their flight home, and then turned around and drove to Salisbury. After a few days in Salisbury, I drove to the Devon coast for a week, then back to Windsor the night before my flight home.

My SO was pretty taken aback at how much I got around in a month. Hehe.

The shops closing early! I'd forgotten about that. My SO was surprised to find out I go shopping sometimes after work (I work nights).

Hmm, differences I noticed? Everything is very organized. Because the Brits queue for everything and are completely polite about it (i.e. no cutting, no pushing, no standing too close, and most of all, willing to form a line at all), we found everything ran smoother. We almost didn't do the London Eye because the line was so long, but we'd promised my son that was one thing we'd do for him. So we bit the bullet and queued. There was a woman at the end of the queue who was only letting the people buying the tickets in, so my mom and son stepped to the side to wait. The line was quiet and moved quickly. At the head of the line was a long counter to buy tickets. When you got to the head, you waited for an announcement stating which ticket station you should go to. This announcement also came with a helpful light show, with arrows and numbers lighting up, hehe. Once I had the tickets, we headed outside to wait in the actual line for the Eye. Again, it was a long queue. But again, it was quiet and moved quickly. All told, from the moment I stepped in line to the moment we stepped onto the Eye, it was about 20 minutes. I was astonished. We expected it to be hours. In the US, it would have been. And it wouldn't have been as pleasant!

[CaptainKaz]

No one queues like the British. It seriously is like a sport for us, and queuing etiquette is learned at a young age because it's AWFUL if you get it wrong and accidentally cut in front of someone or something. It also makes me really mad if someone cuts in front of me, but I won't say anything either - I'll just fume in silence and rant about it later.

The most unusual thing about America for me is the television. You guys have SO many adverts, it does my head in. Also, when I go into a shop, I'm awfully confused when someone greets me and asks if I need help. I'm used to British customer service, which is a grunt of acknowledgement, if anything at all.

Edit: ALSO! Man - you guys have CRAZY food, I absolutely love it. My SO took me to a pizza place with pasta as a topping! Those things are two different dishes! And I also saw a tub of cheese puff things in a Duane Reade. A whole plastic tub! There's also a Willy Wonka-esque choice of chocolate, when really, Nestle and Cadbury dominate here. Because I'm not used to it, I literally have no self control when I'm in New York, and when I fly back, I swear I actually need two seats on the plane.

[ashleecarol]

I'm Sri Lankan-Canadian, he's Hispanic-American but we're really a lot alike. I'll give this a try..

-He can roll his r's so well and I'm pretty jealous
-He hadn't seen a snowflake until he came here!
-I've never seen so many palm trees until I went there.

Agreed. My SO stuck his head out of the window of my car (while I was driving) when it was snowing, made a snow man, went ice skating; he was like a kid in a candy store. I was in awe with how warm it was there when I was down for the winter holidays one year, but I had also never seen a palm tree. And yes, due to his puerto rican heritage, he speaks Spanish and rolls his R's. I think it is sexy

My SO was raised Jewish though (his dad is Polish). I was raised Christian (non-domination). We consider ourselves agnostic now. However, he does continue the culture of his Jewish heritage by celebrating the holidays.

[Xanahtas]

My SO is from Canada and they dont use the same slang as us english XD There has been so many moments ive used a slang word and he hasnt understood what i was on about! I like to tease him about little things like that >.< Also, over there they call trousers, pants. Over here pants are underwear, took me a while to get my head round this XD because Canada and England are simillar anyways, there isnt much different. Although, in winter he can walk around in a hoodie outside in the (small ammount) of snow, and not be cold - Id have a hoodie on, a coat, scarf etc and STILL be cold! I swear he is just a walking radiator... :L

[Xanahtas]

My SO is from Canada and they dont use the same slang as us english XD There has been so many moments ive used a slang word and he hasnt understood what i was on about! I like to tease him about little things like that >.< Also, over there they call trousers, pants. Over here pants are underwear, took me a while to get my head round this XD because Canada and England are simillar anyways, there isnt much different. Although, in winter he can walk around in a hoodie outside in the (small ammount) of snow, and not be cold - Id have a hoodie on, a coat, scarf etc and STILL be cold! I swear he is just a walking radiator... :L

[DemonxOisin]

And floppy bacon is better than crispy bacon, damnit!

Damn straight, Captain! I never liked bacon until I started making my own, because my mom burns it to a crisp -.-

[DemonxOisin]

Although, in winter he can walk around in a hoodie outside in the (small ammount) of snow, and not be cold - Id have a hoodie on, a coat, scarf etc and STILL be cold! I swear he is just a walking radiator... :L

LOL! This happens with me and Miguel all the time! I remember last February, we went for a walk at night, and I was wearing a camisole and a really light leather jacket, open. He was in full winter regalia, and it must have only been negative 10 (celsius) Like honestly, itīs not that bad :P

[uniquefem]

My SO is sasak, the main culture of Lombok island (Indonesia), asian and muslim. And I'm catalan, christian and european so our cultures are very different. We have so many differences that I never would finish of telling all. xD In part I like having cultural differences, it makes everything more interesting. So I just will tell the food part now.

They have many exotic fruits that I even don't know. The rice is their main ingredient but they also vegetables, spices, noodles (almost their only kind pasta) and chicken daily. They don't eat pork or drink alcohol because the islamic traditions. The tea is the most common drink. Milk products and coffe aren't very usual. They fry with coconut oil. They seldom eat burgers, pizza or sausages. Their common meats are cow, goat, duck and specially chicken.

The opositte here. We eat rice but no very often. We don't have many spices and we seldom eat spicy food. Cheese and other milk products are eaten daily or almost, the same about pork. We fry with olive oil and we use it for our typical sandwiches and salads too. Alcohol is almost compulsory here, the people drink alcohol in their social life and its used in some sweets or for roast some meat. Tea is new and strange in my land, but the majority of people drink coffe daily or even different times per day (my mother drinks 8 cups per day). We rub tomatoes in the bread, we burn creams, we grill snails, we have a strange way of eat green onions. I think we eat much more junk food than they.

Enric, i see what you're saying here.

I am from Sumatra Indonesia, while my SO originally from Russia but not living in Germany. Once i told him that we had so much differences; over 1800kms distances and over 1800 differences between us, and even though sometimes we had misscommunication, miss understanding, we still missing each other like crazy.

I went to Germany, and some part of Europe last two months. I could see huge difference in living, food, language, everything was different!

i thought it would be the end of the world when i still could see sun at 9pm!!! i went there in summer so its normal there (yeah you all could laugh)

I often mistaken to go to wrong side of the car as we drive on different side. Europe car are different with asian car for sure. And ohh gosh.. i love driving in Europe, even in French (where they say it hectic..they should go to Indonesia and drive there!!)

I was having breakfast with milk, raisins, banana, cornflakes, bread, toast anything but rice! lucky i was trained to travel without rice, but still its a different thing. In Indonesia you eat rice 3 times a day! when we eat spargel for lunch i thought its just "snack" instead the main course! i loose total 2.5 kgs during my visit for 18 days there.

He never see real banana tree, i had plenty on my backyard. I drink fresh coconut straight from it shell. And we had cassava that i can not find in Germany.

When i woke up in its the church bell that woke me up (in Strassburg it goes every hour??) if you went to indonesia at 5am its the mosque calling for prayer that wake you up!

There are plenty misunderstanding about my religion, including how he first thought i was catholic because i dont wear hijab to cover my head, or veils for my face, and i use "Mariana" on my name. But the nice thing is he learn about it, and respect it.. hehe went to Germany and he safe me a lot from schwein aka pork.

I was drinking fresh milk a lot too, telling him how expensive fresh milk is, and he said in Europe people drink fresh milk and in Russia people made powder milk for long winter (LoL) i dont know if its true or not... but yeah we never really drink fresh milk!

I had the chance to taste 24 different cheese, that i forgot the names... we never had those much!!

Ohhh and i love spicy food, and i get nuts when i can not find fresh chilli at the market, and when i found it and taste it its not that spicy.. lol and i use like bottle chilli from mexico to cook fried rice for him, and he said its spicy!! when i think its sweet..hahaha... (i think he wont allow me to cook again!) and when i said sauce he literally gave me tomatoes sauce.. but in Indonesia when you say sauce means chili sauce! only babies do the tomatoes!!

And top of all... i never see REAL snow in my life, and i will never forget that first time i see it, i was with him when we went to Zugspitze. I was playing in snow like crazy rolling sliding and throwing it all over until i got my nose bleed. I can't stand cold, i had to wear 4 clothes that time including wool hat, and scarf also hand glove, it was -1 still end of my fingers are bluish from cold.

While on the contrary, when the sun blaze at day time, its just around 20es degree, he was burning like crab, and become pale. I was laughing, saying he wont survive in Indonesia! we had sun every day in the whole year thats where i got the brown skin!

Ohh too much differences.... like i said over 1800 differences.. but still .. i love him because of those differences

[SquishyLove]

My fiance is from Russia and I'm American. In Russia, when you go to someone's house you should always remove your shoes at the door, and the polite thing for them to do is to give you a pear of slippers, or "home shoes" as my guy calls them, to keep your feet warm while visiting. Also, Russians always wash their hands after being out during the day when they enter the house. I actually have adopted both of these habits here in the US. I know some people here like people to take off their shoes in the house, but not everyone is like that here. I began instituting this rule for my (our) apartment after I came back from living with him for 6 weeks. Russians don't like very cold beverages, and we like to load our drinks down with lots of ice. Russians like room-temperature or slightly cooled but not super cold drinks like juices and sodas. Sweetie says he gets a sore throat from having really cold stuff, even ice cream (although he loves it, lol). When he has a glass of milk he warms it up and doesn't like to just drink cold milk. It's more socially acceptable to push and shove through a crowd of people to get where you need to go in Russia. It's not considered rude. I experienced this aspect of Russian culture for the first time boarding and leaving the Aeroflot plane from NYC to Moscow. There is less "smiling for no reason" in Russia - if you walk down the street alone just smiling, people will take you for something of a simpleton or easily-amused person. I find the "service with a smile" thing of the USA to be fake and tacky to be honest. In Russia, I found that cashiers and servers were nice enough and polite, but they weren't forced to put on a plastered exaggerated smile like they are here. They were more "businesslike" but they did their jobs well and served well for the most part. Going to the farmer's market in my Love's city was interesting. If you look at someone's goods/wares, or if you touch them, the vendor immediately goes into a pretty aggressive sales pitch, extolling the virtues of their product and trying to offer you a good deal. :P My Love likes that he can burp and fart in front of me and I find it amusing and not disgusting. People in Russia are more shy about bodily functions, but he finds it refreshing and liberating that he doesn't have to excuse himself to pass gas in front of me and we can be comfortable together. Those are the most significant cultural differences we've noticed so far, and other than that, we don't find that there's anything too dramatically different we can't handle it between our cultures.