A Door Closed... A Window Opened?

[Stubborn Hope]

Well, y'all. A couple weeks ago my SO I mutually broke up, after three years as a couple and two years before that as best friends.

My past blogs kinda explain how poorly things were going, and although I did post a more hopeful one at the beginning of August, the situation quickly got worse than before. Essentially, I was ready to start actually making plans to end the distance... because I loved him so much that I thought I wanted to spend the rest of my life with him. He "didn't love me enough for that". So... the pressure built, and we finally had to end things.

We tried to stay friendly, even with the mentality of "it's not working now, but who knows what the next few years will bring?"

A couple days ago, he informed me that he'd spent five days in another state messing around with an ex of his (who will be leaving the country for two years soon) and was "done". Done? With what? "You."

So that was harder than the actual break up. I've lost a boyfriend and a best friend.


But! Since the break up... I've gotten close to my roommate's best friend. Really close. And guess where he lives? Texas! It figures...

I know distance is hard. But I'm older than I was when I got into my first LDR, and this new crush is older than me. So, he's coming to visit in a couple weeks, and we're planning to go on a date or two. We want to take this slow, make sure we do this right, and make sure that I'm ready to try this LDR thing again.

So, folks, I might be sticking around the site! Whether or not that's good is up to you.

[Enric]

You had been 3 years with the same guy, and you forgot him in just 2 weeks? Don't you need longer time alone for forget your ex and date the new guy?

[Stubborn Hope]

Well, I haven't forgotten him... I'm not ready to start a new relationship. I was just saying I might be in a few more weeks.

Second of all... Well, things were anywhere from bad to just okay between me and my SO for at least a year. We honestly should have ended things sooner. So our emotional state towards each other hasn't changed much - just our official status. And, not to say this makes it okay for me to do, but he messed around with another girl only a week after we broke up.

And lastly... I expected people to be skeptical. I really want to stress that if I do this, it will be at a slow pace. So, please, I could use some support...

[Madge]

Take your time. Sometimes it is better to have sometime to yourself but everyone is different in how they cope with breakups.

I hope the visit goes well.

[Madge]

Take your time. Sometimes it is better to have sometime to yourself but everyone is different in how they cope with breakups.

I hope the visit goes well.

[MadMolly]

You had been 3 years with the same guy, and you forgot him in just 2 weeks? Don't you need longer time alone for forget your ex and date the new guy?

I was madly in love with my boyfriend for four years until May this year. It took me one day (when I finally clicked that the relationship was not what I needed) to fall out of love with him. It still hurt like crazy, but it happened, and there was no denying it. Don't be so judgmental, because that comment was really out of place in a supportive environment like this.

To the OP: YAY! I love hearing about blossoming romances. I hope it goes well!

[Enric]

I didn't say that for complain, I'm just surprised and I agree with Madge. Take your time.

[HollzHeartsChris]

That's great, OP! I hope the visit goes well and that things start to look up more for you

[Rugger]

[QUOTE=Enric;147636]I didn't say that for complain, I'm just surprised and I agree with Madge. Take your time.[/QUOTEO]

Some people fall out of love more quickly than others. One of my exes, I was over in 2 days.


I agree with everyone. Take it slow. Go on a few dates. Get to know him. This time you have the learning curve on your side. You know what's coming

[Stubborn Hope]

Thank you all! I really am excited for his visit. Even if it turns out we should just be friends, it's still encouraging to know that I've still got it.

[megfashion]

its good that you are planning to take it slow; you always have to be careful about the r word. (i.e rebound!)
but dont worry, i got over someone within like a week. it just depends how brutal the break up is, i suppose! (the guy lied about some serious stuff).

best of luck, enjoy your date and keep smiling x

[Stubborn Hope]

Well, folks... As you can probably tell from my new avatar and ticker... Things went pretty great. Robin is amazing, and I am so happy we're together!

He even started a profile on LFAD.

[Josephine Falnor]

I fell out of love in a matter of minutes, and this was with a person I had been infatuated with for two years. Within a few weeks, my girlfriend and I got together, and I can honestly say it was the best decision I ever made. I say if you feel like you're ready for another relationship, go for it! Even if it hasn't been too long. Do get to know him first, and all that, but I don't think you should let the fact that you just got out of a relationship stop you.

Best of luck!

[Shepard-Fowkes]

Aww, I'm glad it's going well. Be careful, alright? For his sake. Take your time and most importantly, have fun.

[maja_marky]

its good that you are planning to take it slow; you always have to be careful about the r word. (i.e rebound!)
but dont worry, i got over someone within like a week. it just depends how brutal the break up is, i suppose! (the guy lied about some serious stuff).

best of luck, enjoy your date and keep smiling x

i agree with megfashion, if the breakup is inconsiderable and hurt you so much more than you could ever imagine,
then time to move on...

goodluck and keep us updated!