Metting the family

[Bethypoo]

My boyfriend and I have been together for 10 months. I have a HUGE family and i have very slowly been introducing them (slowly because there is alot of them and because i am rarely home). Anyway, his parents are divorced and one lives on the other side of the country so i obviously haven't met her. His dad on the other hand lives about 15 minutes away from him. I haven't met him. Nor his grandparents who he is super close to. His family has had a huge falling out and there has been alot of drama and he doesn't even choose to see them that often. Therefore he tells me that he doesn't want me to see them like this and if he doesn't want to be around them then why would he want me around them. Especially when his step mom has been known to throw things out windows and such (the woman is nuts).

This used to bother me and now it doesnt. I guess i get it. My question is: is it a bad thing that I still have not met his family and that I am okay with that? Even with the situation that is going on?

[floridaellen]

I don't think it's a bad thing. It seems with all the drama surrounding his family it may be best to not introduce you yet.

[Haley53]

Take it from someone who's in a situation and okay with it despite a handful of people telling her she shouldn't be, yes, it's fine. :P He has his reasons, and his reasons are valid. They have nothing to do with you but with a bad situation, and I can see where he wouldn't want to bring you into it, not only to keep you from witnessing/having to be a part of it but keeping them from putting a mark/scar on a beautiful thing. My partner's dad has no idea about me, and my grandfather has no idea about my partner, both for the same reasons; has nothing to do with the other but rather what we're trying to avoid. So no, I don't think it's wrong at all to be okay with it.

[Jgui]

i dont think it's a bad thing considering the fact even he doesn't see them often. You probably wouldn't want to get all in the mix with his family drama also.

[uniquefem]

I haven't met his parents yet.. and he haven't met mine aswell..

Actually the fact that we meet twice already and i don't feel the urge to introduce him to my family and both of us feeling allright ..sometimes made me wonder hahah...

As long as we both feeling comfortable then its just fine i think. He should meet up with mine oneday for sure, its the culture thing also. Especially if we plan to get serious and get married someday.

[snow_girl]

Everyone family is different, some are close and some are not. I don't think its a bad thing you haven't met his family, he wasn't fortunate to have a close family unit and he doesn't feel comfortable with you meeting them. It doesn't mean he thinks of you or them any less its just one of those situations. I am glad you have accepted it, maybe down the road things will fall in place and it will be more of an appropriate time to meet, but until then you've got the mindset.

[Xanahtas]

I havent met his parents and wont until a few days before we get married! He has met my parents.
Naah its not a bad thing, doesnt bother me really that i havent met his parents - kinda scared to tbh! XD

[rhomy]

I don't think is a bad thing. Apparently he is not very close to them and there is a lot of drama going on there.
If I were you, I would be ok too!

[Dziubka]

My boyfriend first met my mum and brother (and grandparents and some extended family!) after we had been dating for a year and a bit.
I live quite far from them and I see them 3 times a year at most and it wasn't really practical for us to go up there before.

He still lives with his parents, though, so I met his mum the morning after our first date and his dad about a week later.

Family is different for everyone. I'd probably be concerned if my boyfried hid me, but I wouldn't worry about meeting the parents later in the relationship.

[Bethypoo]

Thanks guys. I already felt like it was fine considering the situation and all of the drama but I just wanted to make sure that it was right for me not to push meeting them in this situation. At the beginning i felt like he was hiding me, but as time as gone on and I have seen what his family is going both to themselves and to him, i am sure now that it is better to wait.

Thanks again!